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Everything posted by monicott17

  1. Awful...cool, windy, gloomy. Rain appears to have stopped after being constant yesterday. Only 48 degrees...ugh.
  2. Still in work misery. Had a slight glimmer of hope that things were maybe improving a bit...but I was brought back to reality real quick. Plus I saw a job listing that’s better pay, better location and better work that I cannot get out of my head. I want to apply but have some stumbling blocks to get over.
  3. Not having a good day so far. Terrible stretch of weather continues (I have SAD and weather affects my mood way more than it should), super anxious right now about a work related issue that I have reached out about and no one is getting back to me about and just overrall...feeling hopeless and down about pretty much everything.
  4. Fought through a migraine episode and managed to get a decent amount of work done today. Think I will check in on the game tonight and try and get my mind off of the accumlating snow we are supposed to get.
  5. Nice today...low 60’s, sunny. I hear the sound of a lawnmower outside my window. In a few days though...snow. Actual accumulating snow. I know it won’t stick around long...but snow in late April, especially after we have gad several 80 degree days already is quite depressing,
  6. Anxiety spiking again and feeling lousy and miserable thanks to it being that time of the month. Worrying about everything again also.
  7. Thanks. No meds at this time...doing therapy once a week and I have discussed possibly starting meds but I am not quite there yet. I have been working from home for over a year now and my company is very bad at communciation and lacking structure/organization. They have given no indication when (or if) we will be returning to the office and that plus the monotony, client issues and inconsistent workflow are just a few of my issues. I miss the day to day routine of going to the office and even though I don’t love this job...I really would like to go back in some form. But I am doubtful that will happen anytime soon as the state I live in still has restrictions and capacity limits in place and my sense is that my employer waiting until we can be at 100% so they don’t have to do any work on the office. And that won’t be anytime soon in this state I think,
  8. Dentists have always been one of my biggest fears and my incredibly messed up mouth shows it. Can’t even remember the last time I’ve been in a dentist office.
  9. Miserable and I am once again struggling with work and lack motivation to do anything.
  10. Doom and gloom is all I seem to know these days and it is really getting old. Feel like there is no light at the end of the tunnel.
  11. Had another lazy, unmotivated, unporductive work day. Supposed to be cold and rainy here the next few days...so that will sour my mood even more.
  12. I love visiting outlet malls. They are generally in the middle of nowhere so it is a nice drive to get to them. Don’t really even love the shopping part. More like the getting there part. Oh and fun to people watch as well. My favorite one is a few hours away in a nearby state which also happens to contain my favorite city to visit. Usually hit both several times a year but it feels like it has been forever since I have seen either.
  13. The state I live in is so unbelievably awful and gets worse with each passing day. Worst of all, I am stuck here for the foreseeable future for many reasons, main one being my deteriorating mental health. Also, have my bi-weekly conference call with my boss tomorrow which I am a bit nervous about. Been procrastinating on some things that I will probably hear about.
  14. Sundays are usually a total waste as I spend a good deal of time doing nothing and comiserating about the work week ahead. Did manage to make a quick trip to the store and lunch/coffee with my brother. Spent far too much time ranting online though and shopping for things I don’t really need. Haven’t made a purchase yet though as I am incredibly indecisive.
  15. Sunday night blues setting in again. Thought I was past these days where I would get so down and out on Sundays worrying about the week ahead, first with school then with my former job. My current job isn’t the nightmare my former one was but it still isn’t a great situation and is making me more miserable on top of all my other issues.
  16. Health anxiety...rearing its ugly head at this time. Also, have so much stuff (purses, clothing items, etc..) I don’t use, some have never been used. Really need to do something with it. And I also need to stop buying more stuff I don’t particularly need or want. Just because it is on sale doesn’t mean I need to buy it!
  17. My area has very, very, very long winters so the first day I can open the windows and let fresh air in always perks me up. Love the smell of fresh cut grass as well.
  18. Same! For years, I envied people who got to work from home and thought it was a good thing. Well, its been over a year now of working from home and it is most definitely not all it is cracked up to be in my opinion. Sure, it has advantages...I live in a place with bad winters so not having to deal with that is good and some days I stay in bed until the minute I have to punch it. But it is hard...especially now with my current state of mind...to focus and be productive 8 hours a day. My company is very poor at communications with the staff so that makes it even tougher. The work itself is starting to be more and more messy and disorganized as well.
  19. Thanks. I’ve struggled with anxiety and OCD most of my life but now the depression has started to overtake that. All bad news. All the time. All doom and gloom. It gets to me. I am unhappy with my job, have been for awhile and working from home for the past year, as well as into the foreseeable future is not making me feel good. Plus, I’ve got bad health anxiety and having a bad flare up now.
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