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Posts posted by jxdama

  1. 1 hour ago, sober4life said:

    I don't drink anymore because my mind can't handle even one more time.  If I drank today I would be next to mom in the cemetery by Halloween.  If I ever choose to drink again I'm saying this is it.  I'm done.  There is no other way for things to go.  I fully believe I have one more time drinking in me and that's it.

    Its a great accomplishment to stop drinking

  2. On 10/19/2021 at 11:39 PM, Thanos said:

    Easier said than done. I've been trying to find another place that would have me but nobody is answering. What the hell do I do when nobody wants me, especially now with so many openings here in the US?

    Keep looking  for  other jobs but dont  quit  your  job now till you find a  better  one. You will find a  better  one.

  3. 4 hours ago, Thanos said:

    I know I just had another topic under the relationships forum but this one I thought could use its own thread because there's another thing that has me wanting to hurt myself. My job has been slowly cutting my hours lately so that I only work about 20 hours a week. I started at over 30 and keep getting told that I'm still a full-time worker but that's just bullshit. Plus this problem only started when I asked to have Thursday nights off so have some sort of social life. Since the summer started they have hired 2 people who are working the hours that I used to work. I'm also 36 and can't keep bouncing around from job to job because it makes me look completely irresponsible. But I also can't stay at this job when they give me table scraps for hours. I can't afford my rent on what they're paying me. Right now the only solution I can think of is self-deletion. No more disappointed bosses and no more worrying about going from job to job. I've never had a job where I get the respect I earn. Thought this would be different but nope.


    Talk to them and explain your situation. Also, lots  of  places are hiring  now if you are  in the US.  Try and find a  job with more hours.

  4. 11 hours ago, sober4life said:

    Well since posting this I got the virus and believe she was here with me a couple of the worst days at the bed.  If I believe in anything anymore it meant even god didn't know if I was going to make it.  If I was given the choice I would have chosen to leave with mom.  I've never really wanted to be here so having a belief that I might actually go to heaven I'm ready when you are god.

    Hopefully you will be  here for a  long time.

  5. On 2/20/2021 at 12:10 PM, sober4life said:

    I recently felt like mom wasn't watching over me anymore but today she gave me a sign that she is still watching over me.  It worries me though because there's no way she could get into heaven if she stayed on the side of scum like me.:sniffle1:

    I am sure you are  not scum. For  one thing  you  have  overcome addiction which is very  hard to do. As far as  how  i feel today, not well.  My loneliness will not  go away no matter what  i try.

  6. On 9/29/2021 at 11:02 AM, Evergreenforst4 said:


    Yeah I think people do not understand men's mental health. Honestly just find a way  to express your feelings either with sports or art you have to have an outlet because it makes people suffer like crazy if they don't

    Thats a good  idea. I walk for  5 or  6 miles a day and  it  lets  me clear  my mind and temporarily forget about  my problems.

  7. On 10/10/2021 at 2:48 PM, sober4life said:

    Usually when I tell someone I like them it's the last time I see them.  After everything I've been through in this life people will have the nerve to say I just don't understand what happened when they find out I off myself one day.  No they won't understand.  They've never taken the time to even pretend to care or try to get to know me or try to figure out a way to really help me ever.

    I hope things  get  better. I know the feeling all too well. No one cares if  im alive  or  not.

  8. On 9/28/2021 at 3:48 PM, fearispower said:

    I feel like I must've committed some terrible crime in a past life. It's  the only explanation I could think of as to why no one wants me. All I  ever wanted was to be liked, but apparently that's asking too much. I  have no interesting hobbies or accomplishments and I still live with my  mother, so everyone automatically ignores me. I  go on dating apps, I  swipe and swipe, I send messages, nobody responds back. I bet if I asked  every single woman of appropriate age on this planet, not one would go  out with me. I would've committed suicide long ago if I weren't such a  coward.

    I hope you  give yourself  more  chances. One thing to do is participate  in activities so you expose yourself to more  people.

  9. On 10/16/2021 at 6:23 PM, surfcaster said:

    after being sick and feeling like i was dying for a week finally i am beginning to feel better, also after all the heart tests they finally addressed my original complaint, turns out my shortness of breath issues boil down to allergy triggered asthma, so i am now on meds for that and for the heart palpitations, YAY more drugs, not, but if they work i guess it's ok

    Glad you are feeling  better. Also glad you discovered the  source  of the  shortness  of  breath.

  10. On 10/17/2021 at 1:56 AM, Evergreenforst4 said:

    Yeah it works really well and helps me with a lot of relationships.

    It is kind of like taking the limit in math, you find a trajectory with a person sometimes it can be positive, negative or unknown so you kind of take a limit to think about the trajectory.

    Glad  it works for  you. I seem to have alot  of negative people  in my life.

  11. On 8/31/2021 at 4:32 AM, Charlee said:

    Sorry it  took me so long to reply, sometimes I dont get notified of replies...

    Thanks, I think it was a bit of both, like @sober4life says, the dark rooms trigger me, as do being around lots of people, like supermarkets as well.

    I haven't been out much since that happened, not alone anyway.

    Is it  continuing to get worse? One thing you can do is  order your groceries  online and  either  have them delivered  or  pick them up.

  12. On 10/8/2021 at 12:22 PM, mrrd117711 said:

    I imagined me coping with my PTSD and finally being able to enjoy life. I just have to laugh at how it’s the opposite. So many things are going wrong. I don’t even see me doing any better. This reminds me of as a kid I always thought my life would change for the better as I got older. How can you be hopeful when every time you believe in something it blows up in your face. My life got way worse as I got older as my symptoms got worse with PTSD. 

    I was supposed to get my 2nd shot of the vaccine but I’m one of the people that got adverse effects. It’s not well known that Covid can cause you to have low potassium. You think we’ll how bad can low potassium be. For anyone with a mental diagnosis it’s really bad. It effects your mood, your body feels weak cause your muscles ache and cramps. I’m literally in a daze for almost two weeks now. While all of this is happening all my past traumas are literally hitting me like a truck. 

    I again get triggered and can’t finish what I want to say. I guess for anyone else who’s an empath just good luck. Maybe it’s just how bad my life always is but feeling everyone else’s pain while living like this is messed up. 

    I hope you  can soon find a  bit  of  happiness. Take a  potassium supplement when you eat a  meal.

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