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About Rach4masaya

  • Birthday October 13

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    Western USA

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  1. I have thought a lot about what you said. I kept trying to find a chance to reply. I’m sorry I hope today is a little better. Who knew this life could be so hard. It was all about having fun and I can’t wait to grow up. Now I’m grown and I think I’m so grateful for all of you. I’m glad you post your comments because it’s nice to feel like your not alone. I would give you a hug and tell you I’m sorry. I hope today is a better day.
  2. I’m sorry that sounds like a horrible day. I would be wanting to lay down after all that. I hope you can eat some really yummy food and watch a good movie or whatever takes your mind from that.
  3. I’m sorry I feel for you. It seems like every time I try to put myself out there more I end up regretting it and I feel so stressed afterwards. If you weren’t here anymore there would be a void left in peoples lives. I’m glad you shared because even though I have never met you I feel like your honesty makes me feel not so alone.
  4. I haven’t been a member of this very long, but it’s nice to have people to talk to that understand how you feel and no judgment. Glad you are all a part of it!:)
  5. Hi! I kept increasing my intake of the omegas. You can increase your l-tyrosine intake too. The author says everyone is different. I had to take the maximum. I really hope it helps you ams works for you. The acupuncture for my mood has made me feel a lighter and not so fatigued. I have added some Chinese medicine that the acupuncturist recommended to me. I take the peaceful sunset with the lithium orotate, magnesium orotate, zinc and calcium orotate. I still wake up in the early morning hours and I take doterra serenity and Now Gabba chewable or l-tryptophan. They have helped me sleep without an antidepressant, which was how I slept before. The depression hasn’t went away altogether. I am able to exercise again now, which I couldn’t with my antidepressant. I was to tired and foggy. The exercise and being able to sleep has helped me the most. I wish I could say I felt like a new women again, but physically I feel a lot better. My mood is not cured, but I am not as bad as I was a year ago. I hope that helps. I added grape seed extract for more energy during the day and the True Focus by Now works a lot better than just the l-tyrosine. It has L-Phenylalanine and some other things in it too.
  6. I have tried it. I have heard so many good things about it. I am waiting for the SAINT to come out from Stanford that is similar, but supposedly more precise in its location compared to TMS. For me it didn’t work. I kept waiting for a change or to feel different. For me I came back exhausted for all the work it was doing on my brain, but I would try to lay down for a minute. I could t though because my mind wouldn’t turn off. I still slept at night though, which I struggled with with antidepressants. I was the 20 percent that it didn’t work. I am treatment resistant with medications too so it may work miraculously for you. If you do try it I hope it works for you. Keep me posted! It worked for so many others.
  7. Hey River light now are you doing? How are you holding up? Thinking of ya!:)
  8. My mother passed when I was a teenager. I had to call my grandma. I lived with her for a time. I dread it. I can’t talk to her either. I can’t even talk about the depression. Every time I tried I was told I would be fine. I wish I could put on my red shoes and tap them together a couple of times and the world would be good. Our church I grew up in there says we should be happy if we have the gospel. Magic magic come my way! Depression resolved happiness is here! Send the magic my way!
  9. I am so sorry your mom gas passed. My mom died when I was 17. I still miss her everyday. I keep her picture by my bed. I often think about how I would like to talk to her or what life might be like if she was here. She treated me good as well and was kind. I wish I had her to talk to. I wish I could tell her how feel. I’m sorry for your loss. She must think the world of you and think of you like you think of her. Thanks for sharing that dream. I’m glad you had a sweet mom too.
  10. Sorry he sucks to do that to you. Yah he sounds like my husband. They know what they are doing and how to play it. You deserve so much better! I will be thinking of you. How are you doing?
  11. That would be a hard decision. I am glad you did. I hope you have things to distract you from missing him. You are strong to make that hard choice. Sounds like the right one. Marriage therapy didn’t work for me either. My husband was having an emotional affair ams he manipulated the counselor. In the end she basically gave him an excuse like to was okay what he did. He is narcissistic. My therapists since have all said he will manipulate the therapist. Glad you made that hard choice. Take care
  12. I take supplements that help me, but even with them I have to use Bose sleep aids. They go in your ear. You can choose different sounds. They can block out snorers too.:). If I forget to charge them no matter what supplements I am taking I wake up a lot without them.
  13. Hey! I got the first COVID shot. I am feeling like soon the close of COVID world might be happening. Trouble is the being able to stay at home. Not having to take my kids to activities and an excuse for family to not come to visit has been nice! I used to stress the night before about having to take my kids to their gymnastics. Now the idea of having to start life over terrifies me. I have had a good reason to not have to do things. Exercise has been the only thing I can do hat for a moment I feel a slight improvement in my mood. I have treatment resistant depression and have tried everything, but shock therapy. I am on amino acids right now. I feel the sad still. Now I am doing acupuncture and just started Chinese medicine to help me sleep. My sister says I just need to go do things with others more. Easier said than done when you feel like you have to take anxiety medication to go be around people. Then I feel so tired the rest of the day I can’t get anything done. I feel like this world is taking it all out of me. Things should not be so hard all the time. How do you want to keep going when everything around you makes you feel like why try!
  14. I tell the kids to say I’m in the shower. It’s the middle of the afternoon. Two weeks ago someone didn’t take a hint. They waited for me. It was afternoon and I was in my pajama sweats. Oh man why are simple things like answering a door so hard! Glad for all of you that get it. My family says, “You’ll be fine”! I don’t feel fine. It’s so isolating because you can’t talk to people about it. They just don’t get it unless they live it. I get it! We travelled for a year in the biggest RV we could find. I thought it would be what I needed ams save my marriage. I just felt more alone. There was cool experiences, don’t get me wrong. It was nice to head to the next place when we were bored of it. You can’t connect with people good when you are every week headed to the next place. Although not having pop in visitors or neighbors you feel like you have to say hello to was nice. All in all I just felt more alone. Doesn’t help when you are married to someone who took a psych test that described him as cold and detached. Good luck on bonding time! It gets old having to deal with depression and life. Really old!
  15. It seems like people refer to themselves as depressed to describe their mood that it has taken the seriousness out of the word. People who haven’t truly experienced anxiety or depression just can’t relate. Depression to them is a bad day not bad months or years like people with mental illness deal with. No one would tell the sick individual to just “push through it”. Our frontal cortex is telling us to slow down when things are to much just like someone is physically sick. Everyone just sees the outside, but what is going on inside would bring them to their knees.
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