all heard te story viewer falls for streamer yadayada yada but this time it's a little different.I watch this streamer for sometime and after becoming friendly we said we could meet up in ******. Now I had had started to develop feelings for this girl watching her stream everyday playing games with her , so I told her listen I really like you so do you mind if we dont meet up because it would be just awkward.
So ok that was that. She said sure just I understand just dont be a stranger to chat. So we agree to meet , but stuff got cancelled. this is where it gets interesting, I decide fk it what have I got to loose I'll ask her on a date, surely she will say no , but not quote she says 'I've got really mad expierernce with guy's from Twitch. Im just in a dark place last right now and need to figure my shit out'. Ok so I say well its not a no and she says we can meet in ****** my hometown(We live in different countries).
Meanwhile me and my friends are planning a trip back to ****** , and she agrees to meet up that would be great.(this was after watching her stream for around 10 months). So im thinking 'wow is this really happening am I like going to get to go on a date with the girl of my dreams'.
After that I feel like shes being really distant not replying back , really irritated by me , (why I have no idea). I can 100 completely say I never did anything wrong on her, or what made her suddenly go cold. I send her nice gifts nice presents. I ask first of course.She revcieves them and doesnt even Thanl me or let me know, i dont give a shit about the money but , just top give you an idea I bought a present of custom boots, with her favorite game design on them and her name , cost about 400 euro Im not poor, but Im not rich either I make an ok wage.
So she eventually says I was only ever after her body and thats the only reason I was there. She had nothing to give her that Idea she just chose to think that about me out of nowhere.I realy had developed feelings for this woman by this stage. Simped, yes I know, but it wasnt all in my head.
Anyway's., we decide I will come back to stream, and be friends and that ,and meet at the next event, but Im still getting that coldness. After a week of her not streaming I say are you alive? She replies with I dont want to dm you incase you get the wrong idea , so I say **** this Im out. I eventually explain this to her and she says sorry you felt that way and welcomes ;s me back a second time, and does the EXACT same thing again . I was like how can we meet at an event, if we cant even dm or speak. BY now my head is so ****ed up I just loose it and tell her to
**** off to chaturbate basically called her a ho' something Im not proud of , I acted immediately regretted it, so yeh, Im banned from her Stream (although I had left as my own accord and also unmodded myself from her Discord, so that was unnecessary),but Ive been in contact with her asking her to just give me a reason why she went off me, because I invested so much time in her I genuinely would probably need to have been resuscitated if I ever met her in real life, thats how much. I care for this girl, but she labels me a horrible person a manipulator , and when the person you care for tells you that you start t doubt yourself I do anyway's.
She refuses ti talk to me and give me an answer, to this day and its really tearing me up inside. Can anyone shed light on this situation please , or just tell me Im a horrible person , or whatever because its actualy messing my head up and Im struggling more every day.
This streamer wear's next to nothing and pretty much gets treated like a sex on her stream by her mods, something that always made me sad when watching, but she never seemed to mind , but whatever nobody is perfect I still was mad about the girl.
I am keeping her name out of this although she will know herself. I've pleaded with her to just talk to me , and she says stuff like it doesn't matter if I had feelings for you not.Im well aware Ive never met this girl in person btw so I dont need any hate here please thank you for listening