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  1. Siblings, may god protect us from them! Whew, me and my brother. I love him, but he is the maniac who trash-talks you one day, then tells on you for it. (This was when we were little) We still do not get along. I am also sensitive, and my brother is just to honest and VERY picky, he's older and STILL TOTALLY addicted to electronics. If he doesn't like something you work on SO hard, he'll just say, "Ew, that sucks, actually, what is it." I am such a little kid at heart, (when I am not depressed) and make things out of K'nex and Legos the he never could and he's just like "meh". We have problems, HELP!
  2. You will Never see me Fall. Regardless if I'm weak or not, I'm going to stand tall. Everyone says life is easy, but truly living it is not. Times get hard, people struggle and constantly get put on the spot. I'm going to wear the biggest smile, even though I want to cry. I'm going to fight to live, even though I'm destined to die. And even though it's hard and I may struggle through it all, you may see me struggle... but you will NEVER see me fall.
  3. good idea jkd_sd , maybe try to focus on things, even if there are few, that make you happy.
  4. I feel exactly the same, except even this my friends would not approve of. The are like parents to me, they sort of "look after me" because well, I guess I'm kind of, "The wild one." They would say I will meet someone bad, and do something bad, even though I trust you guys and know I won't. I feel like a backstabber, but if they find out, I will have to leave. And even my friends aren't people I can tell anything to, or just talk to. They think they understand me but they just can't, no matter how hard they try. I am still looking for someone I can tell anything to.
  5. I feel the same, like the world is full of people harming others, nature, hard work, everything. Even just bad things happening.
  6. Yeah, I mean, I get so distracted and depressed until all my life is is just a bunch of "Whatever, I don't care." I had a house fire, and the day this all started was the day we moved back in, so I had to wait another season before life is back to normal. But part of me is wondering if there even IS a normal anymore. Life is so unpredictable that I feel like I will never be safe again, like the world is just CONSTANTLY TRYING TO **** ME. Pandemics, fires, even small things, like burning my hand a getting a very painful blister. It feels like I am being punished for living, and that eventually, I am going to die because of it.
  7. Exactly, just the other day I thought "You are going to be perfect and fix yourself and all this mess." Soon after, my muscles started aching from effort to get my lazy body up, and I felt like I just didn't care.
  8. I don't really know, I can lie to myself and say I'm fine, but I all a mess on the inside.
  9. That is so terrible about your mother, I hope you know we are here for you.

    1. MidAgeDad


      Thank you so much for your kind words!

      Even at 91, she was acutally quite healthy, aside from some osteoporosis. And her insistance on not using a cane while walking at home is what ultimately led her to trip on the stairs and fracture her pelvis. This all happened precisely when all of the ReHab-Long Term Care Facilities decided to go into lockdown. When she was released from the hospital and transported to the 'ReHab' Facility, my Sister and I were told immediately that NO visitors were allowed as of that specific week(early March). We never saw her (in person) again.

      2 Weeks later, we were informed that she was in contact with a Staff Worker that had tested Positive for COVID-19 and was given the swab test. While we waited the 5-6 days for the results, they began noticing a fever and her oxygen levels decreasing. 2 weeks later, she passed. Alone, isolated and scared. No Funeral Services and minimal (less than 10 people) Burial Services. Surreal.

      TY again for your support!

  10. Sometimes I wonder if reading book and playing games is worth it. Most of the time, I say "I guess" But sometimes just thinking about it is enough to make me angered or sad. I am just so sad I can't sit down and talk with him about all my troubles and ways we are so alike. I just run somewhere private and cry, but then I start to bully myself and wonder why I am even here. It is a awful solution, but nobody truly understands in my family, so I feel like I have to.
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