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  1. Thank you for your contribution. Just wanted to let you know that I am here if you want someone to talk to. No one can really understand the situations we face and often see us as dramatic people. I wish you all health, wealth and eternal happiness.
  2. Hi there, I wanted to share a couple of my thoughts on depression. I have been struggling with it for 3 years now, and still struggle with this dreadful condition till today. Since it started YouTube was my go to place for solutions. Surprisingly, it did not help me with all of the information out there claiming nutrition, exercise and a change of mindset is all you need. Wish it was that simple right! Since I was already in the gym and my nutrition was pretty good, I started trying to change my mindset with no real luck, the negative thoughts kept bashing in my head and I just wanted to sleep all day to get rid of it. You will never succeed, you are useless to your family and community, you will always be poor and in debt, all the people you know are rich and have surpassed you. It's really better for everyone if you just die. Add to that the ridiculous anxiety and panic attacks for a lovely psychological tornado. I could not handle all of that in addition to work pressure. I decided to go to psychiatrist, the visit took 5 minutes and he prescribed me an anti depression. That drug played with my mind for a couple of weeks before it kicked in. It made me on snooze mood with no care in the world. I added online therapy with it to get a better result. I felt at ease in the first couple of months but started noting the symptoms crawling back! I noticed that the drugs killed my anxiety and panic attacks but it worked as a pain killer for the depression. Therapy was not of much benefit to me as all of them were focusing on challenging my negative thoughts all the time with no real solution. I guess I got more depressed because of their stories. I have stopped the anti depressions for almost three months now and feel the depression coming back with a splash, they really just numb you up and don't really treat it. I still go to therapy and write out my feelings which helps me out a lot. The most thing that crushed me in the last couple of years is facing this dilemma alone and the hit I took in my finances and social life. Had 3 divorces, lost all my money in a scam, noted that I was all alone in this world with no friends or passions to keep me distracted. It was really hard for me and still is. I feel stupid, useless and a loss of space. However, I really know deep down that this will not last forever and there is always hope. To get back to topic, here is the things I wish that I have done in the past to face it: 1- don't face it alone find a social group should be supporting you. 2- don't make any life decisions in this state, 9 out of 10 they will be wrong. 3- don't isolate yourself from the world and run for pleasure through porn, movies and Netflix. 4- share your agony with your family and they will not judge you. Sometimes I think this is a punishment from God for my bad sins, but I know that it's an illness and anyone can get it, so I will always have faith that one day I will be free.
  3. I would be glad to friends and talk to you. I'm 32 depressed and have no one to talk to as well and wish I could get to know more people.
  4. Thank you for your kind words. I really know in the bottom of my heart that I can win this war.
  5. Thank you for your kind words I believe the most difficult part is facing this horrible situation alone, no one really understands what you are facing and believe that you are being dramatic and seeking attention. I'm trying to keep myself occupied but don't really know what I should be doing. Everyone seems to have a purpose in life except me and that just makes me more terrified of the future. I found salvation in prayer, but I get back to where I am afterwards. I really know in the bottom of my heart that I can win this war but just need a breakthrough in my life.
  6. Thank you for your kind words I have really been inspired by the stories I have read and the remarkable support of the community.
  7. Thank you for sharing your story. I can imagine how isolation and loneliness can affect your mood (been there and still am) The good news is that you are not alone and I certainly believe that this dreadful disease can be fought. I will be cheering you on your journey, I wish you and your mom the best.
  8. Thank you so much @Epictetus I wish you health, wealth and eternal happiness. I really appreciate your kind words. I am really glad that you replied to me it really made me happy. I really need to hear positive things these days. I'm currently in a real bad place and wish that no one ever get to this point in their lives. I wish for peace of mind for a couple of hours and not drain on these horrible negative thoughts. I keep reminding myself that this time shall pass and one day I will be victorious
  9. Hello there, I'm very happy to join this forum. I don't really know where to start but here I go : My journey with depression started in March 2017 after I lost my life savings in a scam. Ever since then I have been struggling with anxiety, depression stress and all what comes with it from memory loss, brain fog and low self-esteem. I have tried online therapy, medication and consultation with no real relief of the symptoms. I'm really afraid that I have lost my mind, and terrified of losing my job and living in debt forever and ever. I feel that everyone have surpassed me and I'm living alone in my own misribil world. I'm 33 years old with a broken mind, heart and soul. Living every day as the previous one and believe that this is a punishment for my bad deeds. I have no friends and am struggling with myself, work and my dark future. I want a fresh start start but I'm surprisingly concerned about what other people would think about me and fearful of them knowing what I have been through. Even with all my breaks in life I still try to show everyone around me that I'm OK and actually doing very well in my life. I really wonder why I lie to others even though they probably have there own worries in life and don't really think that much about me. Will this ever end, or should I accept it as part of life and let go.
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