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hinnage

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  1. Thank you all! I really appreciate the understanding and support! I'm glad to find this community, it really soothes me to know that I am not alone in this struggle against mental illness. I am taking responsibility for my actions during my depression phase. My ex forgave me but she also told me, that she is not comfortable talking until I finish all my therapy sessions. Reason being, she doesn't want something to happen again and we both feel shitty. I don't want anything bad like that to happen again either. It makes me sad that she chose to do that but at the same time, I try to see from her point of view. I may not fully understand it, I realized that she is only human and she has a life on her own. It's not easy dealing with a depressed person. But there's hope. She is willing to talk again after my therapy is all done. A good thing to look forward to! Thank you all for the support.
  2. She replied. We've talked a bit and sorted things out. Back to therapy. Thanks guys
  3. I did. I even send her a voice note, another apology. And the last thing she said to me was " I forgive you but I don't ever want to forget it. Go figure things out come back later" And nothing from her since then. I don't want her to hate me. I just..my head is sick. And I'm trying the best I can to cope with my panic attacks. It's been going for hours. It's really really painful.
  4. Hello there, Hinnage here. I'm new. I just really need to get this off my chest. I been having very bad depression phase since my ex broke with me. And last thing I did to her, was accusing her of pushing me to suicide. I wasn't myself completely when I did that. And it's only when after the damage is done, the fog in my mind becomes clear. It always happens like this. The fog in my mind puts me in a trance and I only snapped back to reality once "it" made me do something really bad. Help! I am really going crazy. My ex doesn't wants to speak to me anymore. Therapy been going well. But the panic attacks between sessions is really overwhelming.
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