Dont know how to keep my privacy and yet deeperately need suggestions. Anything is appreciated. Depressed and alone, feeling like I’m going through a culture shock and don’t belong here. Friends in past city seem caught up in their family lives now to even help with advice. I’ve learned that reaching out to strangers online also makes us vulnerable to some who try to take advantage of this. So here I am here, anonymous as possible. A bad experience on a singles site taught me this.
A few years ago I moved quite a distance to an area that is very different from my lifestyle to be closer to my adult children and lost my home equity doing so. I bought something small to live in and it’s the cheapest part of the country. I felt I was being a good person to do this. Gave up a very independent/active lifestyle living near public transit among people in a city with my same beliefs and interests. After the move I learned that it didn’t quite matter to my kids that I was close and was not invited to holidays and my birthdays 5-6;years running, The other kid is a bit too far for that to happen and in a situation where we can’t visit.
I’m unable to make friends due to the differences in political and religious views. There is no university center near to make connections, I’ve tried. I’m not a church goer, don’t drink and there are few cultural activities. I have very limited means. I was once in a prominent position where many wanted to be friends but found that if you have little, you’re not treated the same way as when you did. I’ve helped many people in my life and not a selfish person.
My problem is this. I want to go back to my previous city where I was happy. I won’t have enough to rent and the sale of this place will only give me enough to last a few years. I cannot stand it here. I’m a senior in very good health but fear homelessness. It’s terrifying. But living here is just a slow, lonely death.
Psychotherapy here mostly faith based. Please no criticism about this,
The isolation here is gut wrenching. I went to a few Meetup.com activities and was a fish out of water. I think SSRI meds would only be a temporary fix in my case of depression. I’ve tried before. I need encouragement to let go of most of my possessions and my old car to go and live where I feel peace and can breathe.
Thanks for reading this far. Am I crazy? How do I leave without feeling like I’m abondoning a family who hasn’t visited me all these years? I know as have codapendency issues.