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Soarsie18

Senior Member
  • Content Count

    653
  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won

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Soarsie18 last won the day on May 1 2019

Soarsie18 had the most liked content!

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About Soarsie18

  • Rank
    Senior Member
  • Birthday 08/19/2000

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Female
  • Location
    Wales
  • Interests
    Being carefree and happy

Recent Profile Visitors

2,901 profile views
  1. You're right, I don't think I know what life I want yet.
  2. Can't afford heating, living like a communist
  3. Veggie burgers and cuddles
  4. I wish there was more to life than this, this isn't enough
  5. The only finished painting I've managed to produce, which is frustrating ...not quite there yet 😕

    IMG_6481.JPG

  6. Alcohol and smoking is the only thing that makes me happy, I can't enjoy anything without them.
  7. I've gone back to doing things that I used to love doing when I was younger,I exercise a lot and paint, especially doing paintings for people I love and sending them, it gives me a focus and helps me relax. When I started off I was so frustrated with the results but with practice its coming along nicely, hoping to sell some because not only is there lockdown but covid makes it hard to make money. Moneys tight and its scary.
  8. I've always been body conscious and have flipped in and out of different eating patterns, however now for the first time I'm alarmed, I feel out of control. My body has changed dramatically in the last couple of years with me growing into a woman and getting a more feminine body. I don't completely hate it. But eating however has become a struggle, whenever I eat I get a pang of guilt, depression and major anxiety. I don't know how to cope with it, and I'm scared.. Because its no longer a body issue but a mental one,no matter how much weight I lose the anxiety will still be there and that scares me and makes me feel hopeless.
  9. it's been rough. My emotions are all over the place. I need to get them under control because at the moment i am letting them control me, control my life and my actions. I increased the dose of fluox today, I'm hoping that it will help me cope better. Starting university in three weeks, absolutely terrified and i have no idea what to do with myself in this time in-between. I just wish i had a friend my age who could comfort me, i don't know anyone going through the same thing as me right now.
  10. Ok. I'm having a mental breakdown i guess. The good things just aren't good enough anymore. I've lost weight. I'm socialising again. All the 'normal' things that i needed to do in order to recover. I have a possible long distance relationship. My first relationship ever. Talk to me a few months ago and i would have said that i was undatable. Still it's not enough. I need his touch, his hugs. Just talking on the phone isn't enough and its breaking my heart. I need someone to tell me that i am good enough the way i am, because i don't get that from my family. And for some reason having someone say it over the phone isn't as believable. I still feel just as worthless and unloved. I've gone back to not being able to get up off the sofa. And that is WITH meds. it sucks. I don't know how to fix myself and get to a point where i realise i am good enough and i stop needing any validation from anyone else. Help please. I feel like I'm losing control again.
  11. Yeah we do argue, the only time we argue is when one of us is feeling down, which causes the other to feel guilty and insecure. We never argue over anything else and we always manage to calm eachother down and feel better again. It just worries me because whenever he has an anxiety attack i always blame myself, and i can’t see how we can stop the fights from happening. I love him so much, worse comes to worst we will be friends and i will always be there for him. The whole thing takes such a big toll on me emotionally, I don’t know whats right anymore.
  12. devastated, the boy i like is either too broken for me to fix him or i am just not good enough to make him happy. He was the only hope I had. I let myself get carried away thinking that maybe i could be in a happy relationship for once. what should i do, he needs me but i feel like we’re both hurting eachother.
  13. Me too, I keep hurting the people closest to me. I can't stand myself anymore
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