Tears_Always

nothing says you leave her without anything, it should be things like pension until divorce then it is all yours. Things like that. I am not sure how you work but I actually have notes taped to my desk under my keyboard to remind me not to let things bother me, not to say anything, ignore whatever, some days they even help

Drowning in my own thoughts and sorrow, feeling alone and unwanted (which is true), wondering what the point of anything is.

Well I am going to weigh in here to, 31 years should mean something, but yeah your own attitude is what can **** you. I think I am a lot like you take everything personally. It is hard to let things slide off. Going to wish you luck. Really wish you would visit a lawyer about your agreement of divorce, your ex-wife should not be getting everything forever. Good luck.

Nope not a coward, something left to do maybe. Like others for selfish reasons glad you are still here. Hugs.

Haven't been on much but when I am I check here to see how you are doing. I can't offer any advice and can't seem to help myself let alone someone else. all I can say is once again you matter very much to me, not that it means much. When I joined just about a year ago you were one if the people who made me reconsider taking my own life at that time. As I fast approach the one year mark, I hope I am able to find a fraction of the strength you have displayed. Hugs.

hugs, sorry that you are having such issues. I unfortunately have memories of getting caught with similar situations away from home and it is not pleasant to say the least. hugs

I hope you are able to stay in the present as much as possible no tomorrow's. At this point very happy to hear that you have found some calm no matter how it comes to you. hugs

I am glad to hear that you are finding a peace of sorts and that you have finding some of you. Good for you for doing just what you can. Hugs

thanks for asking we don't have it north of the 49th parallel either. Hugs Mark.

I am glad you laid it out to your NP at least someone connected to your life in the real world now knows just how you feel, Is anything going to change doubt it, but I hope that at least for a second your load was lighter. hugs

Glad you did that more people need to aids, depression, and real life needs to be addressed there.

Haven't been on for a few days but hugs.

Aw hun what happened? Hugs

Mark at this point there is no such thing as a wasted week. You took your days at moment to moment as you needed to. I hope your shots turn out. hugs

I get you, I work so I am around people but I have no meaningful contact with them. No one cares.

I am guessing they are a typical counselor and it is all your fault and whatever else... sorry that is happening, nothing you can do about them but please just keep letting your kids know you would like to be a part of their life, even if you can't be.

I am sorry. Hugs.

Go back to bed, the heck with the week, it is time for you to rest.

Well I am going to bed, not that it matters I will lay there for a bit and finally cry myself to sleep, wake-up tried slog through another day and do it all over again and again....

Hugs Mark, I so wish that we could offer more than words.

@RiverLight it is time for you to go to the CEO, be honest with yourself you have said many times that it is your direct boss that is the problem and that the job isn't worth keeping with him in charge. DO something about it, you have done a lot of great work recently so let it out. Get a meeting with CEO and use an approach like you are concerned that credit is not being given were it is due and that because of this the wrong people may be given assignments or asked to assist in things they know nothing about, if you know of anyone else this is happening to bring it up as well. To me it sounds like either he goes or you do so what's it going to be? Good Luck.

So found out tonight that I was ghosted by yet another person who I thought was a friend. I must be such an awful person that I cannot even keep online friends. I just wish that someone would tell me what it is that is so wrong with me that no one wants me around. I really have to stop trying I am so stupid. I just can't get it through my head that people are only interested in me when I can do something for them, and as soon as I start to believe in them and myself I am alone again. The world is such an awful place with me in it why do I have to be here. Everyday is just more pain. What is so wrong with me why am I so broken.

Tried haven't slept well since January and it is catching up with me big time. My eyes hurt from the tears I always have in them. Lonely and lone because I always am. I want to know why I wake-up everyday. I read though everyone's posts and in my mind I say so much, but I just don't have the energy to actually write, so I add that to what I feel bad about.

I am so sorry yet happy Mark (crying as I type, the fact that you are giving up Spot makes this so real for me). I am so glad that people are interesting in taking him. He is a wonderful kitty and your photos have captured him so well. I hope that you either gave it all to the clinic manager and told him were he belongs or hung up on him, or either way just didn't let him get to you. I am guessing you were polite and listened to his lies. Sending you hugs Mark.

I stopped stopping in there cause I could never find anyone there