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nojoy

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About nojoy

  • Birthday March 9

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    Female
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    Virginia

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  1. Do I get dressed & do some of the stuff on my list or do what i did the past 2 days - nothing?
  2. It seems that the cycles of depression is beginning to switch from okay to I'm hanging on by my fingertips. I will only ever be okay in life, never good or great. I accept that. But recognizing what is triggering the mood cycle is causing some of my problems. I'm just to darn sensitive to the behavior of other people & how it affects me -hence the drop in the mood.
  3. It is very helpful & freeing to write here. Like Svenetc said here you can be free of the mask. And I'll add that here are others who understand & are non-judgmental.
  4. for a change I am feeling pretty good considering that the plumber couldn't install the water heater because the electrical connection needs to be move. the electrician can't come until next monday & oh yeah the water pipes in the wall are beginning to rust out. It's just another day in the paradise I occupy.
  5. I know how you feel. I have been diagnosed with arthritis but over the years the type of arthritis changed depending on what symptoms I had that day. Even a rheumatologist could never decide which type I had. So he called it atypical, asymptotic rheumatoid arthritis because he couldn't figure out what I had. It is true that once you've injured a joint you will develop arthritis in later years. I brought one of those battery powered screwdrivers & I have no problem using it. I've been going around the house & yard to find things that I can now use it for, instead of waiting for my nephew or son in law to come over.
  6. i do use the blog to record my thoughts & feelings. It is a safe place that I can vent & express the negative thoughts in my head that no one in my family can have access to. In the past I've used a spiral notebook but my daughter needed paper & tore it out of that notebook. And that taught me that writing in a notebook was not a safe place where I could feel free to express myself. Unless it is negative thoughts, I have difficulty putting words on paper. There is this disconnect between what's in my head & my hand. I can create wonderful stories in my brain but the words never make it to paper.
  7. kinda upset. my daughter called & said that my granddaughter's school was in lockdown. There had been a shooting at another high school across town. What upset me was the news anchor made this comment "This is a STEM school. This are smart kids." I came so close to calling the tv station because of this comment. What does being smart have to do with mental health. As I told my daughter, this kid probably showed signs/symptoms of a mental breakdown & no one paid any attention to him/her. The signs are there, but they are ignored by the people around the person. Not only was this incident upsetting to me, but my daughter told me that last week, there was a practice lockdown & my granddaughter's teacher had to google what to do!!
  8. More family drama led to this conversation. My niece by marriage called last night & during the discussion about the family drama I said that my brother (her father-in-law) really needs to sit down with a professional. I reminded her of the year that I nearly gave up on life. That's when she said she didn't know what to say to my brother or me about depression. I just told her what not to say ("get over it, it's all in your head, get up and do something, stop feeling sorry for yourself & other negative things). I told her that if she could find something positive or constructive to say, a hug will say alot. And sometimes that all we need. I wish I had the ability to write a book about what to say to a person who suffers from depression/anxiety. I'm sure there are books out there but I haven't found one yet.
  9. More family drama led to this conversation. My niece by marriage called last night & during the discussion about the family drama I said that my brother (her father-in-law) really needs to sit down with a professional. I reminded her of the year that I nearly gave up on life. That's when she said she didn't know what to say to my brother or me about depression. I just told her what not to say ("get over it, it's all in your head, get up and do something, stop feeling sorry for yourself & other negative things). I told her that if she could find something positive or constructive to say, a hug will say alot. And sometimes that all we need. I wish I had the ability to write a book about what to say to a person who suffers from depression/anxiety. I'm sure there are books out there but I haven't found one yet.
  10. How I can get rid of the family ... legally or at least not get caught
  11. Hello & welcome to all newcomers! This is a safe place to talk about what is happening, a place of non-judgment (because we are there ourselves), a place where we support each other & a place where you can vent when you need to! We're not medical personnel, but we share what is/is not working for us. Check out all the forums. Share when you want to, Many times I have been on here & not said/liked anything, just came for the comfort I feel when I'm here.
  12. numb... this time it is better than feelings & having to deal with the family is better when I feel nothing.
  13. My niece is leaving in 2 days. She dropped a bombshell on me today about he father, my older brother. She said the same thing about him about 25 years ago & it nearly tore the family apart. My brother repeatedly texted & called me because I wasn't home & did not answer him. It seems that I'm not suppose to go anywhere. The anxiety keeps me home, if I go the store, I get what I absolutely must have & I'm home in 30 minutes. My niece knows about this & makes sure that I get out of the house 2 -3 times a month & it usually for the most of the day. It just seems like everything is becoming overwhelming. And when that happens, I get closer to the dark hole of depression. Thanks for asking.
  14. What motivates everyone when it comes to exercise? I have a very hard time doing any form of exercise. The yoga studio I was going to close back in Dec. I was driving to the beach to walk in the mornings. But now I don't do anything. I have yoga & other exercise cds, but about half way thru I give up & sit down.
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