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Depressedgurl007

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About Depressedgurl007

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  1. When I think things are getting better, it always gets worse. Never forget that.
  2. The past few days have been horrible and even staying in bed the whole day yesterday to just escape but I still feel the same. How to find the motivation to do what I need to do. How to ignore the pain and keep going. How to tell my bed to stop calling me back cos I can’t stay in bed forever. How to stop hating myself when all I want to do is leave this place forever. But I have to keep going. Want it or not, I have a daughter and my current job haven’t end yet. I feel like a horrible parent, horrible wife, horrible person. But I have to keep going
  3. Had a good day today. Started out terrible but kept telling hubby to be patient but well I guess people take a VERY long time to be patient so what can I do but endure and repeat myself. And say sorry a million times. Give and take, balance it out, catch myself when my anger starts to boil and stop asking why does sh*t always happen. Had a good day today.
  4. I thought I enjoyed reading. Maybe I did. Maybe I used to read cos the people around me read and I want to be like them but now I have noone around me and I don't know what I enjoy anymore. I feel you so much What we like changes as we age. When you reach your limit, try to find yourself again
  5. Depressedgurl007

    Leaving

    Will miss seeing you around but wanna wish you all the best with life and family.. and you are welcome back anytime. I leave and come back a few times already lol cos its hard to find another place to let my feelings out. Hope u find your peace in life too!
  6. It's time of the year for me to job hunt again.. I face this before but it still makes me feel awful and wonder what am i living for and the fear of being useless to everyone and people's judgmental looks will be repeating in my head again.
  7. It's ok to feel bad and upset it's something nobody wished had never happened, but talk things through with him about what happened and listen to each other and decide how you want the conversation to end, which is not in a bad way. I hope things get sorted out for you.
  8. It teaches you, meaning you learn from it. Learning is growing. Brain cells grow new connections and neurons, and existing neural pathways can strengthen. Or I can run away and never start a fire ever again. Which is much easier. I may be wrong. Sigh. Which is what I’m doing anyway. I always run away. I cry n run n hate myself for being the stupid idiot that create the fire in the first place.
  9. This is me. Except I do make a bit of income here and there but I can’t hold on to a job for long. And how incapable I am at everything always makes me want to run away. Balancing the husband’s needs and our own needs and together time is always difficult but that’s one thing u seem very capable of. Though it’s really a learning journey with so much pain sometimes and pleasure at other times. Like what u mentioned, gotto bounce from that again n again n again, so hugs to both u and me for trying
  10. I remember saying this a few years ago and with every effort I make, social things always give me so much pressure and pain. Pain supposed to help us grow though. Hope u find what u like. Maybe volunteer work or something if u like that kinda thing. Enjoy the peace while it last and before embarking on something new.
  11. I recently got very angry with a friend and decided to ignore that person forever. Or at least a month or something. I hate people who hurt me and don’t understand my feelings. I’m having so much trouble doing the simplest things I don’t need extra salt. I need to protect my heart like now.
  12. A few bad thoughts and bad actions do not make you a bad person. Like how the ocean is so deep and beautiful, but all you can see with your naked eye are the waves on the surface. You, too, are full of many unseen value, and a few bad weeks only make you more aware of yourself. Ride the waves.
  13. This happened to my uncle after decades of service to the company. He bitches about it many times to us now cos there was nothing he can do. I wish there is still hope for u. Stand your ground and ask them for more for the many many times that u did succeed in performing your job duties. You’re not worthless, you are fallible but you’re still worthy in other areas in life. But I know that feeling worthless feeling still.
  14. Sad overwhelmed irritated unhappy upset tired can’t sleep but still have to carry on ugh
  15. I care. I can’t be around much but I feel for you. Happy belated birthday I don’t personally celebrate birthdays. It’s just a normal day to me.. Keep trying n finding new ways to get to sleep ok. I’m sure there’s a way out there to help u. And I understand about hiding the pain. People just don’t get it. It’s sad that we know our family just don’t care yet the desire to have them care for us is still there. I hear u, I feel the pain. Hang in there.
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