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Bowser

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About Bowser

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  1. I'm so sorry that it has taken me so long to reply. Thank you all for your encouraging words. I look forward to participating more in the forum and trying to help other people as well.
  2. Sorry for the rambling, but other than registering here a few years ago, I'm new to posting here. Yesterday, I had a cancel a week and a half long vacation out because for most of this month and last month my insomnia has come back extremely strong. I've had some traumatic events happen like learning of the deaths of two people I knew, plus getting a strange 24 hour illness which made it so I couldn't even move or eat. I'm not sure if the approaching daylight savings time change is causing my insomnia either. I'm afraid to go to the emergency room again because of the way they treat psychiatric patients. I have also exhausted the number of medications I have tried. I know I have brain damage from being experimented on by being put on over 40 different psych meds over the course of over two decades. The combination of Depakote Sprinkles and Klonopin seemed to do the trick to allow me to have as normal of a life as I could with what can only be described as an anti-depressant induced mental illness that is similar to bipolar disorder. I'm pretty confident that the fix is to increase my Klonopin from 3 mg to 3.5 mg or 4 mg, but my psychiatrist wants me to get off any type of benzo completely and not in the proper manner and then be put onto antipsychotics like Zyprexa or Seroquel which I have tried previously for sleep which I know no longer work. Right now I'm searching for a new psychiatrist and my GP is just doing the prescribing for now. The kindling effect on my brain and CNS from being pulled on and off so many meds for years has essentially destroyed my body's response to them. I'm really not sure what to do next because I cannot function without sleep. Does anyone here have more problems with insomnia around the time that the clocks change forward or backward? Is there a master sleep resource on this website that someone can point me too?
  3. I'm new here and I have a complex story but I'll try to keep it simple for now since I'm not sure how active this site is. Back in the mid 1990s I was only a teenager and because of suicidal ideation I was forced to take Prozac. Prozac caused brain and reproduction system damage to me called PSSD. PSSD wouldn't have a name until around 2005. Instead of doctors slowly weaning me off of the various antidepressants they put me on, they just kept making my life worse by cold-turkeying me off the medications where I would then wind up in an inpatient psych unit pumped full of more psych drugs and then called bipolar. I am now permanently disabled because I have brain damage from 40 different psychiatric medications. I am currently taking Depakote Sprinkles, Klonopin and Anafranil. I was trying to do my best to live on this combination of medications but I have now found myself with my worst symptom which is total insomnia. My stepfather passed away earlier this month but he was more of an enemy to me and a stressor to my mother and I, so I am not sure why I am not even more relaxed. I do not wish to go through another hospitalization, as I will just be pumped full of more medications that will cause more damage. I am searching for other ways that I may be able to calm down and get back to sleep. I was supposed to do things such as reduce the Anafranil slowly via Dr. Peter Breggin's methods so I can get my PSSD fixed since there are finally treatments for it and even get stem cell therapy to undo some of the iatrogenic damages but if I cannot stabilize, I won't be able to do any of this. I hope some of this makes sense. Any assistance would be greatly appreciated.
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