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About DialAForAlan

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  • Birthday 12/15/1989

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  • Gender
  • Location
    Planet Seren
  • Interests
    Alan Cumming, Genie, Mena Massoud, Aladdin in general, gaming, reading, writing fanfics and poetry, sleeping, fanboying, internet, and making photo edits.

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Recent Profile Visitors

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  1. A little more awake than I probably should for 4 in the morning but otherwise okay. (DST anyone?)
  2. Not bad, but not great either. Think I need more coffee before I can tell for sure.
  3. Just when I think I can handle my touch starvation, I'm hit with a deep, crushing desperation for it cause the last time I was touched in any sort of meaningful way was in 2010.
  4. Feeling a little bit more awake than I should be right now, but at least I'm not sad or anxious too.
  5. No worries. And yeah, two years. I pretty much fell for her the moment I started to really get to know her.
  6. Yes, very sure. Especially since it's been two years and nothing about them has changed much. And as I said before, I can't see someone else because she's the only decent one for this kind of therapy.
  7. It would cross boundaries since she's a kind of therapist or I'd consider it. And I'm trying to ignore my feelings but it's not working.
  8. I hear you. I'd love to distance myself from her but as I said, there's like nobody else for this or I would've already.
  9. Unrequited love hurts. Especially when you're attracted to someone whom you shouldn't be like I am. I've had feelings for her for two years and it's not getting any better, nor can I see somebody else because she's the only decent one in my city, or I would've switched by now.
  10. God...just when I thought I was finally cheering up, I feel like crying again. And if I wasn't so afraid of being unable to stop, I'd cry and get it over with.
  11. @sober4life I feel that in my soul. The only place that ever came close for me was my first apartment. And I'm beginning to think I'll never find it.
  12. I just want to go home. I mean, I have a place to live and everything, but it doesn't really feel like "home," if that makes any sense? I've lived in this place for five years and it still feels foreign somehow, like I'm trespassing.
  13. I've been strong for so long now that I've forgotten how to be vulnerable and let people help. I'm also afraid to cry cause it's been so long since I had a proper cry that I probably wouldn't be able to stop - like that scene from the animated Alice in Wonderland but much worse. In a word, I'm a mess.
  14. Continuing from my previous post. He wasn't that old, either. Probably in his mid-sixties or early seventies at the most, but at least he died doing what he loved most (fishing). Why do bad things happen to the best people?
  15. The last 24 hours have been weird, for lack of a better word (probably because I'm still in shock over what happened). See, one of my aunt's closest friends passed on pretty recently. And I got to know him quite well because he'd go to musicals with us (that is, me, my aunt, and some of her other friends) every summer. Now that he's gone, those shows will never be the same again. I'm just...trying to make sense of it all, I guess?
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