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Everything posted by JessiesMom

  1. Yes. I am trying to hang on to positivivity - but I am slipping.
  2. As I expect many of you are, I have been struggling with increased feeling of depression and anxiety in these times. Part of what keeps me going is being intentional about maintaining a hopeful attitude about how bad this thing is or could be. What I am finding is that, when I talk about the positive things I have read or heard that are, quite frankly, keeping me sane - people invariably respond with negations and worst case scenerios. To make matters worse, they then frame my views as "you are just in denial" or "we need to accept the reality" - which, of course, only feeds into my own self doubt, pushing me further toward the abyss. I think that, for some people, facing the worst case scenerio helps them to cope with what they have to cope with. However, for me this kind of thinking is toxic. Does anyone else have this problem and, if so, have you found any way to tell the people close to you this?
  3. My first cat was named Mumbo. My second cat was named Kinko, because there was a copy place in our town called Kinko's Copies and he look just like Mumbo. My current dog's name is Jessie. She came with the name Karma (because karma is a bitch) - but my husband refused to yell "Karma" out the back door. Usually I just call her Jessie and she calls me dumb Mom.
  4. I know - it is just nuts. By me it is also spaghetti sauce, noodles, soup, frozen chicken, beans, canned soup........etc. It reminds me of the crazy buying I always saw before a snow storm.
  5. I feel you @samadhiSheol - I too need to get away from this for a bit. Part of what is really bugging me is the message that I keep hearing regarding how we "should" be reacting. We "should" understand that, by doing all this stuff, we are keeping other people safe. The reason it bugs me so much is the implication that if you are feeling any negative emotions (anger, frusteration, disappointment, etc) - they are evidence that you are being selfish. If you are questioning the decisions that are being made and being derisive about some of the panic you see around you - you are in denial and just need more information. I have all the information I need - thank you very much. What I need is some time and space to work through what I am feeling.
  6. Trying to stay rational, but of course I cannot tell if I am really being rational - or just being in denial. This self-doubt stuff is really fun.
  7. Detected cases tripled in a week. Remember, not to long ago it was nigh onto impossible to get tested. Therefore, people who had it were not getting tested. Now the tests are available - of course more cases have been detected.
  8. Oh yes - I totally know what you mean. I am not coping well with this madness at all.
  9. Thanks @sober4life - I was just being flip. My son actually worked at the dining hall at his college and is totally all about food safety.
  10. I recently asked my son if it would up my amount of crazy to get some disposable gloves to use in the kitchen for things like rubbing spices on a raw turkey breast or mixing egg and meat to make hamburgers. He assured me that it would not Glad he gets me. Or wait......maybe I have already reached maximum crazy so therefore there is no way to increase. Damn >.<
  11. This may be a strange one - but I have decided that I will get over it. With the new virus - it is just dumb. I hate hand sanitizer. Everytime I use it, I feel like I have residue on my hands and I have to go wash them. Hence, I try to avoid using hand sanitizer. In our current time, I am finding myself being asked to use it more and more often. Has anyone every experienced this and if so, were you able to find a way to get over it?
  12. It sounds to me like he was concerned that the "xoxo" indicated that you thought that the relationship we more, or could become more, than he wanted. It was likely not to have been meant to be cold, but sometimes when men communicate directly - it can feel cold to us women. If it were me. I would say, "ok, no worries" and stop using the "xoxo." I expect that he had no intention of wanting to end the friendship - but was feeling uncomfortable with the level of affection he read into the "xoxo."
  13. OMG, I feel this way too. Like, "Ok, when exactaly did I become my Grandmother?" (I'm only 45, but I seem to look more and more like her everyday.
  14. I have quite a bit of loose skin, especially on my abdomen. After my third child was born - my body just said, "Fine, you want me stretched out - let's see how you like this."
  15. More Minecraft shenanigans. Yesterday the 11 year old and the 20 year old were having a conversation across the living room about what they were doing in game. The 11 year old girl did something foolish and was kicking herself for it. This is what follows: Me: Well, it is not as bad as the time you filled the entire world with bees. Her: (quite sternly) We do not speak of that
  16. This helps me too - the more information I have - the less the capacity to panic.
  17. Was he a psychatrist or a psychologist? My sister has a psychologist she gets therapy from and a psychatrist who monitors her meds. She sees the therapist on a regular basis, but she seem Dr R only about once a year.
  18. I have realized that, in terms of worrying, I am something of a binary switch. One position is blase - the other is total freakout. This emerging virus situation is causing me to veer wildly from one to the other, but there is nothing in between. Apparently taking a reasonable amount of care and worrying just a little bit is just not an option for me.
  19. A while ago I saw a short video online. It showed one hamster running and running on his wheel. The other hamster was lying on the wheel and riding it around and around, while his comrade ran and ran. Wouldn't it be nice if we running hamsters got to switch place with the riding hamsters once in a while?
  20. My daughter told me at the beginning of the year that her goal was to be the weirdest kid in the 5th grade. You are not a loser - you are unique - lean into it
  21. Listening to my 18 year old and my 11 year old playing Lego Lord of the Rings together. They fight with each other quite a bit, so these moments when they connect on a common interest are precious.
  22. I cannot speak to the specifics of the situation - but perhaps some general insight might help. In my experience there are two different kinds of people when it comes to plans. There are people for whom plans are set in stone and cannot change to unexpected information or pretty much anything else. They will carry through on their plans no matter what. Twelve inches of snow - bah, I am still going to the movie, because that was my plan. Not feeling quite well - plan are more important - pop a few pills and carry on. It is very much in my nature to be this kind of person. Once I had decided to do something or had made plans with someone else - if the plans were in any was disrupted it would put me into a tailspin. I would doubt the other person's regard for me. I am still like this to some degree, but I fight against it. The second type I will call "fly by the seat of my pants" people. Such people tend to look at plans differently than the other kind. Plans are just ideas that may come to fruition or not. Decisions like that need to wait until the situation has developed more. This does not mean, in my experience, that the person does not care about the person that they made plans with - rather they have come to realize that sometimes other things come up. Or they are aware that sometimes the things that happen to them during the day that make the previous idea not the best thing for them. This could be defined as selfish, but I prefer to think of it as self-care. I am in not way judging you feeling or experiences. However, if this person is someone that you want to keep in your life - if might behoove you to talk to him about it. Express how you are feeling in "I" statements. Ask if there is something you can do to help. Maybe ask if there is something he would like to do - or make the plans more "chill." Instead of (for example), going to a club or a noisy restraunt - suggest a quiet night or pizza, popcorn and a movie. Or if you are more comfortable being in public - a walk after work or at lunchtime. At the very least, I would recommend trying to look at plans with this friends as "nice to haves." In other words, don't invest a lot of time and energy into long term plans, but rather appreciate the time you have together.
  23. Frusterated. Once again I have been accused of being a "helicopter parent." This generally happens when I do something for my college age children. Today it was the following - my 18 year old asked me to put some money on his bus pass (he is in school and has no income source). I failed to do so. Therefore, he requested that I pick him up at school, so I did. I have always cultivated relationships with my children where they know that they can count on me if they need me. I do not think that this is a bad thing. I do not try to solve their problems without being requested to do so. And even when they do request, I generally only offer advice on how to deal with a difficult situation. Arg!!!
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