9E4

I am speechless. It sounds more like your mother was evil than you were "weird."

Expecting one person to work that much is unreasonable, whether or not they suffer from depression. You don't get nearly enough time to sleep, let alone accomplish the mundane tasks of daily living. It is also counterproductive because anyone would become exhausted and not work efficiently rather quickly. I can't help but wonder what job(s) are requiring you to work that much. It does not mean you are disabled if you cannot handle working that much; it simply means you are a human rather than a machine.

HopeBoi, your post reminds me so much of my own experience with OCD. Unfortunately, OCD does not go away on its own, and I can say from experience that it can truly take over your life and disable you. Don't just keep struggling; seek treatment. Self-help books on OCD can help you get started, but I still strongly recommend seeing a therapist with OCD expertise. You can work through any embarrassment you may feel. I promise that the results are worth it.

I am in a similar position in that I do not want children and am not looking for a relationship. I have seen multiple psychiatrists/psychologists/therapists, and not one has had any issue accepting that. None of them suggested that not wanting those things indicates a disorder. I suggest you find a different psychiatrist if possible. At least, try to not take what she said so personally. Her credentials do not actually give her the authority to decide whether or not you are a "normal person."

I think that the key to protecting your privacy here is to not post personal information such as your full name, phone number, etc. that can be used to identify you.

You and your doctor may want to consider increasing your Prozac dose to 60 mg before giving up on it. Prozac did not work very well for me until I was taking 60 mg each day.

As is generally the case with OCD, you need to use exposure therapy. You need to just let yourself fully feel the anxiety about this dream. Think about how something bad will supposedly happen to you, and cope with the discomfort associated with this thought. No seeking reassurance from yourself or others that the dream is not important. Face your fear of bad fate. The anxiety will gradually decrease. Having experienced OCD myself, I know that this therapy takes time, but it works. OCD therapists and self-help books are helpful for guiding yourself through this therapy.

I switched from Zoloft to Prozac earlier this year, and it took over six months for the Prozac to really work. I had started at 10 mg, and it was not until I had been on 60 mg for about three months that I felt it was working well. I also started taking an Omega 3 fish oil supplement, for whatever that's worth.

Something that keeps me from excessively fearing death is realizing that I already was not alive for one eternity (before I was born). Being dead for another eternity seems like less of a big deal then. Maybe this way of thinking will help you too.

I have similar issues, and when I find myself pondering those questions, I tell myself not to obsess over trying to know things that I cannot know. Easier said than done, I know. Finding something else to do helps; it can get you thinking about something else instead. Therapy also helped me by having me make a list of personal values that I could strive to fulfill each day.

I remember I started to feel better the next day. In about two weeks, I felt completely back to normal.

I had a similar experience when I tried adding Wellbutrin XL to Zoloft for increased energy. I was on the Wellbutrin for over a month, first at 150 mg and then at 300 mg. I gradually became very depressed with suicidal thoughts; it was like the Zoloft was no longer working. I told my psychiatrist I wanted to get off the Wellbutrin, and as soon as I stopped taking it, I started to feel better.

I strongly relate to this post. I am about to graduate from college yet feel like I am stuck in middle school. Somehow I have nearly earned an engineering degree, but I hardly consider myself an adult. It is like my personality died many years ago, and I never grew out of the mentality of "being a good kid and doing what grownups tell you to do." I have been living in this very house with my parents for fifteen years, and it is hard to envision a different reality for myself. Is it 2018, or is it 2008? Does it even make a difference to me anyway? Depression makes things worse by interfering with my memory and generally making me dumber. It is like the knowledge I gained in college is being held hostage by depression. Meanwhile, I have regressed to being a 14-year-old.

I am a 21-year-old college student who lives with his parents. I keep to myself and have no friends or even a desire to have friends. I am extremely insecure and self-conscious to the point that I ruminate on mundane interactions I have with cashiers, the mailman, etc. I feel embarrassed to exist. I do not speak unless spoken to, and I am too ashamed to look people in the eye. I feel that I am inferior to everyone else -- they're right and I'm wrong. I am going to graduate soon, and while I am going through the motions of looking for a job, I am highly skeptical of my ability to get one. I feel that I am a lunatic, a freak, a recluse. I enjoy little to nothing in life, and when I try to change that, I often end up frustrated and feeling even worse about myself. Listening to upbeat music by a particular artist makes me feel better? But that artist was accused of child molestation, so I am a horrible, deranged person for enjoying his music. I might be interested in pursuing a particular career? I picked the wrong college major. I have been going to therapy regularly, and while I am able to understand how my thinking is not rational, emotional reasoning continues to rule my life. My depressed feelings are overwhelmingly strong, and my concentration and memory have become poor. I also have been seeing a psychiatrist and am waiting for Prozac to hopefully help me. I often wonder if I am beyond help though.