I have never had a learner's permit or driver's license. I am twenty six and have never even held a job longer than a few weeks. My depression has morphed over the years from my own self loathing and inadequacies which inevitably lead to drug addiction when I was younger. I got out of it through shear will power but it's scary what's happened to me. I don't care about anything anymore, I seriously don't want to work, go to school, I have several assignments piling up and all I want to do is wallow around in my own pity. I have some really ****ed up darker emotions I don't feel comfortable talking about, because I doubt anyone would even be prepared for a monster of my caliber. I hurt myself in the form of cutting with dull objects because I am addicted to the pain, not dying part. I want to suffer because it's all I am capable of feeling or enjoying anymore.