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About SpeSalvi
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Psychology, Philosophy, Religion, Science
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Am I cursed or just born to be miserable?
SpeSalvi replied to celine___1's topic in DEPRESSION CENTRAL
Hi, I am sorry you are going through this, it is a terrible feeling to be alone. I can relate to a lot of what you are saying, I too had felt alone with no girl friend or anything like that. I haven't been in a relationship ever and I am 31 years old. But don't loose hope, you are still young you can find someone just keep looking, Maybe if you join a gym or dance classes like someone else mentioned it you could find someone. Life can change in a blink of an eye. -
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Tymothi reacted to a post in a topic: i need need more advice about asking girls out aka social anxiety
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Hi, first of all I want to say you are really brave, doing something like that takes a lot of courage I am impressed. I also suffer from Social Anxiety disorder so I know what it feels. I think you are on the right track, keep doing what you are doing. Maybe at a bar or at gym might be easier to ask girls out or like someone said before try online dating that will remove the awkwardness.
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Hello and welcome to the forums. I can relate to what you are saying, I also been through HOCD and lost attraction to women. In my experience the attraction came back after I worked some stuff on my Cognitive Behavior Therapy. Your lack of attraction might very well be an obsession, I think you just switched in topics but for me it is the same OCD that was haunting you with those HOCD intrusive thoughts. I recommend getting therapy, it is very hard if not impossible to treat oneself's mental struggles alone, specially if it is something like OCD. I hope my message helped somehow. Hope you get better
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Ixeua reacted to a post in a topic: I don't care about my job and hardly getting work done during this COVID-19 pandemic
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JD4010 reacted to a post in a topic: I don't care about my job and hardly getting work done during this COVID-19 pandemic
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It is getting tough, specially at nights when my anxiety peaks and I get a lot of intrusive thoughts.
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chalkysoap reacted to a post in a topic: Feeling depressed due to turning 30 and having always been single and a virgin
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Kogent5 reacted to a post in a topic: Feeling depressed due to turning 30 and having always been single and a virgin
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Hi, I guess we are on the same boat. I am too a 30 year old virgin. I have social anxiety disorder, it makes me so anxious being around a girl that I can't stand it and plus I have cero social skills. Like you I have been called names and made fun of. A year ago I felt miserable and I was in a deep depression. But I started to take meds and going to therapy and it has helped me a lot. Still no girl friend but I have been on dates. So my advice is to seek for a therapist, they can help you learn and practice social skills and plus you will have support which in my case it is essential. As for feeling bad being almost 30 and a virgin, It can be troublesome only if you let it. I have to say I have been a victim of the social stigma surrounding it but I learned that I will not let that affect me, it is just some stupid social prejudgment. So that's my advice to you, you don't have to listen to it if you don't want to. Just trying to tell you the things that have work for me in some degree.
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How do you forgive yourself when you have OCD?
SpeSalvi replied to Ljj71400's topic in Obsessive Compulsive Disorder - OCD
Hello, I am sorry you are going through this right now, I know OCD can be hell but there are ways to make you feel better. First of all I recommend seeking for therapy, if you aren't currently doing so. I can relate to what you said, having OCD and having done some stupid things when I was younger certainly haunted me. Disclosing to someone the stupid things we regret might help, it help to me talking to my therapist and telling all the things I regret. Now with OCD you can't analyze the thought that will only get things worse, what you need is to let the thoughts flow, not analyzing them just let them pass through, don't fight them!! The more you stay with the thought, as if you where observing, the less anxiety will cause you. Treat them as just thoughts or mental garbage. We all had sin, the thing is to forgive yourself for whatever you made, there is no unforgivable sin even the worst among us can redeem our selfs and be forgiven. -
Hi and welcome. First of all I am so sorry for your loses. Maybe it is a symptom of major depressive disorder. I also have dysthymia and I suffered from major depression disorder a year ago, doctors call this double depression. I remember being tired all the time although I did shower. Losing the need to shower and other cleaning necessities is a sign of depression. I recommend therapy if you haven't done it yet.
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I can relate to what you are saying. I am 29 and I felt that I had wasted away my years because of fear, particularly fear of being with a girl. But I have learned that I am still young, you are younger than me, and I can still changed. What I am trying to say is that it is not to late to change, maybe therapy can assist you in giving you more courage because it definitely has done for me. The first steps are always the hardest but so what take a leap and make that live stream on twitch, the more you expose yourself to fear the braver you get.
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Hi everyone!
SpeSalvi replied to Fallout2019's topic in **A Special Forum to Welcome our 'NEW MEMBERS'!!**
Hi and welcome to the forum. I am glad you are staying away from drugs and alcohol, they can really mess up the treatment. 20 mg of prozac is the starting dose I suppose your doc will increase your dose until you reach the desired mood. I am currently on 60mg of prozac and it took almost a month for the antidepressant to kick in. I felt really bad during that time but it does get better. -
Hi, glad to hear prozac has worked on you. For me, it took a little to kick in, like 3 weeks. Those 3 weeks I felt like crap but once the prozac started working the change was noticeably. I am currently taking 60mg.
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SpeSalvi reacted to a post in a topic: Why does it feel like things just work out for most people yet not for certain others?
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Hi, I had suffered from religious OCD. The thing that helped me a lot was letting the thoughts flow. If there is a blasphemous thought just go along with it, it can't harm you it is just mental garbage. God knows you are suffering from OCD and those aren't you real feelings, OCD is just garbage. I would recommend therapy, because it has helped me a lot for this particular problem, but if that is not an option try to read some books about it. I recommend Stop Obsessing by Edna Foa, its a great book and addresses the religious obsession questions you have.
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Hi and welcome, Lexapro is one of the safest pills out there. This is the first choice pill pdocs prescribe when dealing with depression because it has few and low side effects. Also 5 mg is a low dose so probably you won't feel a thing.
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SpeSalvi reacted to a post in a topic: Share an Interesting (or not so interesting) Fact About Yourself
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Hi and welcome to the forum.I am so sorry to hear what you've been going through. I can relate to what you are saying about being alone and feeling the angst of it. And it is brutal, but what had helped me is talk therapy and meds, also learning social skills had made me more confident of my self. Still I am no were near where I would like to be but I had made progress. I suggest looking for a therapist if you are not doing so, it can really help. I disagree most women don't care much about looks.
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See it this way, he isn't worth your time, a dude that acts like that isn't worth anybody's time. You are much more worthy than pursuing somebody who can't appreciate you, if he doesn't want to be with you his loss not yours. You deserve much better and not a guy who doesn't care about you.