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anxiousE

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About anxiousE

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  1. @filledupandpouredout always available to chat! I mean, ok, i may be taking a break, but I can still see if someone messages me via email updates and I come straight running if it's urgent. hehe (and by urgent, I mean, for any reason you need a buddy) so, just keep that in mind. And obviously you can see my post above yours. I'm in the same boat right now. My obsession is getting stronger...but like you, i'm also trying to avoid searching everything...oddly, i still find out things anyway though. lol best!
  2. Ok, I was originally planning on a break from DF for some time, but I had something I just HAD to share. I think I might actually have a case now of a CO. It's nothing to do with the big s (sex. and it's ironic because I had a "sex" dream with him once...although I suppose we didn't actually do anything. Apparently HE wanted and was chasing ME. How flattering, but I'm sure it'd be embarrassing for him. sigh! anyway.), but I'm just utterly "in love" and obsessed and get a thrill anytime this celebrity is mentioned...furthermore, I feel like I'm lacking when they don't post on their social media as much...but at least they do. I'm not sure how troubling this is yet, but I AM obsessed and really feel something strong with this one. edit: also, I'm already thinking about meeting him...and I don't do this often. I still think it's highly unlikely though, but it'd be a dream.
  3. actually, these were weightless, not even bodyweighted. eh hem and I'm still sore! So it's probably the latter. lol
  4. Hey River! I'm also concerned. Apparently our state has declared a state of emergency and things are closing down here too. Haven't been to the store since the worst of this, but I'm afraid of running out of toilet paper, for instance, and it being cleaned out. Oh this is just madness! But I'm trying not to panic. Hey! So I know I haven't been online in awhile, but frankly, I still sometimes look from the outside at this thread. Did I see you had an encounter with the devil??!! I know it wasn't exactly that, but i guess that must've been very frightening! Sorry. Speaking of looking from the outside, @sober4life I heard you had a birthday and the party went well? That's excellent! Those were just the few that stood out most to me. But Wishing everybody good things! ❤️
  5. My triceps are sore today! Guessing that's not an exercise routine for daily use. Either that or I'm really soft! 😛
  6. Sorry I've been MIA for awhile without notice. I might disappear again for awhile too, but came in to let folks know and update my exercise. Not much lately but Did my arms again tonight, a new weightless routine i found on YouTube (Actually it works a bit in the shoulders, chest and I think, even back too. Plus I've been adding a forearm exercise too) good stuff! Still a little under the weather though so not much more...although I did walk to the store and back today!
  7. Hey! Sorry I didn't give notice that I was going to disappear for awhile. It just kinda happened. And I'm still thinking I'm going to take a break for awhile. Just too many things that keep me online and I feel I have to cut back a little for some time, till I get my priorities straightened. Frankly though, tonight I feel like being here because I feel emotional about something someone said to me...i mean I kinda disagree with it and want to hide from that...but maybe they're right? I dunno. Is it a bad thing I wake up first thing in the morning and go online? That's honestly like the best time for me to do it and then take a break all afternoon. I don't see why I have to do work right away and then "play". I ...i dunno. Maybe I should give it a try though. Im also being pestered about going back to therapy/seeing a pdoc. Ugh! It's a huge hassle, but I dunno. You probably would agree on that. Maybe? Maybe not? Again, sorry, but this time for the stupid and awkward post. Im feeling really mentally clumsy right now...was complete brain fog earlier. Anyway, so maybe ill see you tomorrow. Maybe in another few days. I kinda might need some different perspective on some of these issues. Thanks for reading! ❤️
  8. was tired at first when I started and was petering out towards the end because I hadn't eaten dinner yet... but I did 30min walking (1.5mi) and about 20 min of yoga/stretching. better than nothing!
  9. Ok I'll go back and read, but I just gotta get this out NOW. Why am I such a screwup?! I keep making stupid mistakes and I just feel really down about it in this moment. :( But I've got too much too worry about today, that I need to quickly get over this...hate. man, do I really hate myself right now?! How unfortunate, because I need me to be my own cheerleader. Nobody else is gonna do it! :( (I know that's not entirely true, but it takes my power to actually believe what people say...just like I should be able to stop myself from dwelling on the negative things people say about me, sigh, but it seems that's more prevalent...maybe. I dunno! I'm just sad right now...itll get better tho. I hope!)
  10. We made lamb chops for the first time tonight. (She says randomly) Um, I FEEL okay, but I kinda want to go watch some Netflix at my folks' house, but we may have other plans tonight. I'm mixed about it. I mean, we could have fun here, but I KNOW I'll have fun over there. Sigh!
  11. Ok, sorry. I forgot how the react button works now until I got about halfway down, so let's just say I like all of these posts! Well, it has been a minute since I've worked out and today still wasn't my full routine, but at least it was something. 20minutes of yoga/stretch warm-up and 15minutes of walking outside (yes, outside). It was a little warmer, I was sweating in my coat, but it was still too cold to be comfortable and my face was freezing (not literally, but it was very cold and icky)
  12. Right now I'm feeling kinda low...and bored. I mean I have to go prep for meals today here soon, but I'm having my vitamins, morning meds and coffee and it gives me time to think...hmm...
  13. Not sure how I feel about that statement, but I know what you mean. Is it better to forget? Sometimes I think that's the only way I can get by...but then the same issues keep happening again and again...but they still haven't been fixed and I'm not sure they can be...hmm...
  14. Not a very eventful day. Woke up early but took a nap. Made and ate lunch, but it wasn't enough for dinner...but I wanted to go visit the kitties and watch Lucifer on Netflix, so I did. Then had to scrounge together something for dinner. Hopefully it won't make me sick cuz it was leftovers. I feel ok at the moment. I really hope we can get pizza tomorrow and at my favorite place! I'm crazy craving it!! Mood: okay
  15. Hey folks! Even if I could get a bike, I've really nowhere to store it. :P Right so tonight's workout-20min yoga/stretch and 20m 4 sets each of bis, tris, and shoulders. Not really in the mood for walking right now, plus I've got chicken baking in the background. :P
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