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ugly_sock

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  1. Hello Epictetus Thank you for your reply, this actually makes me really happy! Yes i am, my body is pretty weak so i visit doctors quite often... they never mentioned anything that could alter my mood, but i do have atypical disorder symptoms that did make me more insecure as doctors didn't believe me for a long time. And thank you very much for your words (they actually made me cry).
  2. Oh! I'm very sorry how do you delete the post? still new sorry....
  3. (I'm will be rambling I'm sorry) I know nobody will read this as there are enough people that have more reason to be heard and helped. As i don't think i had any major trauma or any mental disorder i should be able to cope and be able to pull myself by the bootstraps. I do tend to forget a lot of things but thats probably one of my excuses as per usual. I don't even know what i want.... i just want some validation i guess?... I just don't know what i want anymore... most of the days i just want to die and be over it, the fact that this will end makes me comfortable.I'm numb, hobbies that i adored are uninteresting to me anymore...yeah... my friends either forgot me or just blatantly ignore me... I guess i'm just really boring or a toxic person...I don't know...I'm just tired... people tell you you are their best friend and then don't contact you, people tell you you are in a relationship and ignore you, you are a family and nobody listens to you....so tired.. why even bother? I just am a strain to my parents, who don't even like me that much (a very childish thing to say i know), no job, sad, overreactive, insecure, if i knew a way to instantly and painlessly **** myself id do it. Why is it so hard to **** yourself? I do go to a psychologist but i'm too embarrassed to tell her that hurt myself not to mention that i tried to **** myself... Well if you were curious enough to read all this here is a virtual hug *hug*
  4. (I'm will be rambling I'm sorry) I know nobody will read this as there are enough people that have more reason to be heard and helped. As i don't think i had any major trauma or any mental disorder i should be able to cope and be able to pull myself by the bootstraps. I do tend to forget a lot of things but thats probably one of my excuses as per usual. I don't even know what i want.... i just want some validation i guess?... I just don't know what i want anymore... most of the days i just want to die and be over it, the fact that this will end makes me comfortable.I'm numb, hobbies that i adored are uninteresting to me anymore...yeah... my friends either forgot me or just blatantly ignore me... I guess i'm just really boring or a toxic person...I don't know...I'm just tired... people tell you you are their best friend and then don't contact you, people tell you you are in a relationship and ignore you, you are a family and nobody listens to you....so tired.. why even bother? I just am a strain to my parents, who don't even like me that much (a very childish thing to say i know), no job, sad, overreactive, insecure, if i knew a way to instantly and painlessly **** myself id do it. Why is it so hard to **** yourself? I do go to a psychologist but i'm too embarrassed to tell her that hurt myself not to mention that i tried to **** myself... Well if you were curious enough to read all this here is a virtual hug *hug*
  5. Well as the title said i have no idea how this works and if i should post this here.....if this is the right one could someone tell me and if not show me the right way?
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