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About Joyce

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  • Birthday 04/14/1958

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  1. I have been of effexor for 15 years. It helped alot for many years but 4 years ago I had 2 major events and had to go from 75mg to 150mg. It was fine for the time I needed it cause there was alot to handle at the same time. Now, all it does is making me tired, no motivations, it sucks the life out of me. I had a day or 2 that I felt great but I don't think it is because of the effexor. I am also menopaused (almost 3 years) which plays a big role. But the effexor has taken its toll on my brain. I don't care most time while being anxious physically. I see all the things I have to do but I just can't do them. When I have a bit of energy, I try to do as much as I can. It has been like this for 4 years and I just can't live like this anymore. Plus, I have intestinal problems now. at 150 mgs a day I have diarrhea every time (sorry about saying this) but that is what is is. I really feel like I'm going to lose it most times. I tried to lower the dosage but than I feel real bad. I know effexor is the worst AD to get off from. I also take Klonopin. thank goodness. I can't tolerate any SSRIs. So, I'm really limited. I also tried pristiq but I had palpitations. Forget wellbutrin. I have GAD and depression. I become restless and shaky. I'm pretty much out of options. I know the menopause is probably playng a big role so I do need something. I'm afraid of HRT (hormonal therapy replacement) because of the problems it can cause. so I have GAD and depression plus the menopause. I truly feel like I'm going crazy. I'm 57 and I feel like I'm waisting the years I have left because my quality of life is really bad. sorry for all this negative but it is how my life is right now.
  2. Thank you makemesmile (like the nick ;) ) You are right. I was like that too before I got sick. I raised 3 children pretty much on my own. Went back to school when my youngest started school. Worked hard. A friend of mine told me something today and it is true. It is in french so I will try to translate as best I could. She said 'You have to mourn who you were'. I know I will never be the same again. I have suffered from GAD all my life ( I learned the hard way 12 years ago) when my body said enough is enough. I also have dysthimia and both are chronic. But I was still functional and had a demanding job. But, thank you for what you said. It is so true. I have to look at who I was before and see it is no laziness as I was anything but lazy! Thank u again :) Joyce
  3. Hi, I am an oldie of this forum but have not been around for quite awhile. Before, I was mostly in the anxiety related forum. But for the last 2 years I have been having depression that has been diagnosed not even a year ago. There is a person that is suppose to be my friend that do not believe I have depression. Well, I have depression and GAD and also have developed some agoraphobia. This person makes comments and it is affecting me. Well, a little thing will affect me or doing somethng simple give me an anxiety attack. This person told me 'when do u know you won't have depression anymore?' or 'Go out, stop saying Inside, it is depressing'. Other remarks she made before to let me know she dont believe I have depression and that she thnks I am lazy. The worst part is that I Wonder myself sometimes if i am just lazy. I want to do something and than just give up. Main thing is who i a now is not the person I usually am. This person has hurt me and I'm tired of judgments about my condition. I just needed to vent a little so thanks for reading me. Joyce
  4. Hi Marie, I also take Effexor XR but I take 187,5 mg a day (150 mg in the am and 37,5 mg at diner). I did take 37,5 mg a few years back and I was more sleepy although not as much as now. I work and it is tough to get up in the AM! I can sleep 12 hours sometimes. I also take klonopin for my anxiety. I tried Paxil at first, before effexor xr and I also was a real zombie! I hated it! I would say that all ADs have a sedative effect to different degrees.Only one that do not is Wellbutrin. I would like to take it but I can not because it makes my anxiety much worst. I am nervous enough as it is even with the effexor and klonopin! I know you are not the only one feeling that way. Maybe it is the dosage as 37.5mg is barely a therapeutic dosage. 75mg probably would help you more. Have you read abit more about it online? Joyce
  5. Joyce

    Anti-Depressants. Yes Or No?

    If you have suicidal toughts, you need to seek help right away! It is not true that meds do not help. First, you got to find the right med and the right amount. Sometimes it takes awhile. If you do not want to take meds you can go the natural way. There is millpertuis that is recommended for mild depression. It might work for you. You can get that at pretty much any health store. But since you are getting worst, I highly recommend to get help fast! And one person bad experience do not mean everyone has bad experience. Therapy might help you and you wont need meds. I dont know. It will be your decision in the end. Good luck Joyce
  6. Hi hobz, I have been on effexor for over 10 years now and I think it is not really working for me anymore. My dosage was increased but I am always depressed. I can barely do anything as everything seems like a mountain. I have to kick myself in the butt even to take a shower. I asked my pdoc to try wellbutrin but he do not want to give me effexor with wellbutrin. Just wellbutrin. Seems there are dangers of convulsions with this mix. I have a pdoc and general one and both told me the same thing. Thing is I also suffer from GAD and I am afraid of taking wellbutrin alone. I need something to calm me down. I have a mix of GAD and depression. I can not take any SSRI since I do not tolerate any of them. I tried cymbalta. Never again. and with pristiq I tougth my heart was going to give up. I also take klonopin which I do need for my anxiety. My dosage of effexor is now 175 mg (or so) a day. I take 75mg with 37.5mg and 1 mg of klonopin in the morning than 75mg again with .5 klonopin at diner and .5 klonopin before bed. My depression is not better and I have been doing this for months. I really feel efffexor is not working for me anymore. I did not know a med could poop out on you but I guess it does.
  7. Nice to meet u Avalon I wished my parents had divorced when I was 10 years old. I remember telling my mom cause like you even if the abuse was not physical, it was emotional and psychological. At least you knew. But it is not easy to deal with when you know your parents should not be together yet they remain together. I learned that my grandmother forced my dad to get married but remember that was in the 50s. Thank you for sharing your story. It helps to know I am not alone. Well, I know I am not, but it helps to read other's similar stories. Joyce
  8. I have never craved alcohol since I have been on Effexor. And I have been on it for over 10 years. I do not believe Effexor is the problem. I have my own little theory. And that is from experience. Not me personnally but my dad was an acoholic. I finally discovered why. When you drink it is because there is something behind the drinking. So, maybe Effexor is not the right medication or the dosage is not right. Of course, this is my opinion. Joyce
  9. Thank you DarkRain. Well, I was rejected as a child from the family but since I did not know I tought I was the problem. I tought people could not like me somehow. But now, this is resolved.Of course, to a certain degree I still have insecurity but i'm better. Me and my cousins are back in each other's life and I am sooooo happy. I now know why I was rejected as a child. It is better to tell your child. I know from experience. Hope this can help some people to 'come out of the closet' if they have children and are afraid to tell them. Believe me, your child will love you no matter what. And yes I did love my dad but at the same time I had resentment (which was normal). If I had known. Now, I just wished he was still alive for me to tell him it is OK to be who he is. That I would even have loved him more if I had known. Because I wanted my dad and mom to be happy. Thank you DarkRain for acknowledging me. Joyce
  10. Hello, First, I just want to say I respect people no matter who they are (unless they are serial killers lol) so here it is. I need someone's perspective about my father and my own problems. I will try to not make this too long. My father passed away on September 7, 2011. My mom passed away last year. My parents stayed married but my dad was an alcoholic and let say my life as a child was very traumatising. My dad was never abusive to me in any way, shape or form. He loved me. I know that but he was very unhappy (I know why now) but I did not know why than. After my dad passed away my mom told me a few times that he 'might' have been gay but it was always confusing. She told me that before they got married he was going out with a man but than she would told me he liked women. That he cheated on her. Let me tell you, I was confused. Was he gay, bisexual? It was not clear.I even wondered if my mom made it up. The fact that she stayed with him confused me more. My mom truly loved my dad (he was a very good looking man) and I believed she hoped he would change. Know that we are talkiing about people born in the 30s. But it always was ambivalant. When my mom passed away last year, my cousins (we are all female cousins except one male cousin that is gay by the way and I love him dearly, I always did). Anyway, after losing my mom, I became an orphan since I am an only child. I have 3 grown children but it is different. Somehow, since than me and my cousins have become close again. Which is for me a blessing. I love them all dearly and it just makes my heart filled with happiness to have them back in my life. Last week-end one one my cousin had a baby shower for her daughter. One of my cousin gave me a lift back home and we were talking about our childhood. All the cousins spent alot of time together when we were young. At some point we were talking about my dad. Her mom and my dad were close so I knew she knew things I did not know. She said 'you knew about your dad right?' I said 'no, what is it?'. I needed the truth! Her eyes filled with tears and she was holding my hand and she told me 'your dad was homosexual'. I told her I knew but I was not 100% sure. It was such a secret in the family that I was confused about this. This for me was a huge relief. At first, I was angry at the family (not my cousins) but our parents specially my mom and dad for NOT telling me. As a child I knew something was off but frankly I never tought my dad was gay. I just felt there was someting wrong with ME. Like I was taking his burden on my shoulder because he was unhappy. Hence, being an alcoholic. I also learned from one of my other cousin that all his male friends were gay. I never knew cause my dad did not want me to know. He forbidden the family to tell me cause I believe he was afraid I would stop loving him. I dont know how I would of react if he would have told me but I would still loved him. I even love him more now because now I know the truth. it brakes my heart that he hide it cause he was unhappy and I would of prefer for him to live the life he was meant to instead of pretending and making our life miserable at the same time. I also understand why I always felt different from my cousins and the rest of the family. One of my cousin told me 'in french' but I will try to translate as best as I can 'les non dits tues' which means 'what is not said (secrets) kills'. Soooo true. Of course because of that my dad was an anxious man and I have GAD and mild depression but I have to say since last week, I feel like I am on the right track to recovery. Like this thing I felt iinside of me all my life, I now know what it is and I am starting to feel liberated. My dad loved me very much. I dont care that he was gay. I just wished I had known before he passed away so we could of been closer. Makes me sad. I just need someone insight maybe that can understand what HE was going through or that have been through a similar situation. Thank you all in advance for your support and understanding. Jocelyne
  11. Effexor affect serotonine and neropinephrine. But, it also affect the serotonine with a dosage under 150 mg (not sure but it is around that. u need to check with your doctor or online). At a higher dosage it works on neropinephrine and that is where it might work on the depression. That is what my psychiatrist told me. You need to talk to your doctor about this. Ask him about this. It might be the reason.. BTW, I take Effexor for anxiety that is why the dosage is lower. But with depression you need a higher dosage. Good luck!
  12. I have been on effexor xr for years and klonopin. Thing is, I had to upper my dosage last June after my mom passed away. A month after I lost my job of 9 years. Let me say I at least doubled my dosage. Thing is at a higher dosage, I just dont feel much of anything with effexor. Like, who cares u know. I have no libido whatsoever. Do not have a boyfriend so its a good thing. poor guy would be miserable! Anyway, I asked my doctor if he could add wellbutrin. He did not want to. I was insisting and he almost gave in but warned me that he was going to write it was against his recommandation. Finally, he showed me in written that effexor xr with wellbutrin might cause convulsions. Let say I decided to have zero libido! I am not saying it will happens but since my main problem is anxiety it is probably the reason. Check with your doctor if you would like this combo or do the research. I am not saying it will happen. It is just what my doctor told me and showed me in written. I can not go higher with the effexor. So, I am kind out of resources since I have no tolerance with SSRIs. I tried Pristiq. made my heart race. Cymbalta was a disaster. I am pretty much out of option.
  13. I take effexor for GAD (generalized anxiety disorder). Been taking it for 9 years. Off it for awhile in between but had to go back. I tried other ADs and none works for me specially SSRIs. With effexor I can concentrate better, it helps control my GAD symptoms (physically and emotionally). Since I often anticipate the worst and I get anxiety attacks with effexor it really makes a big difference. I would not say I dont care. Just it puts me in a place where my emotions dont get out of control. I dont sleep more with it. I guess it depends what you take effexor for. And how your body reacts to it. what works for one might not work for another. I would not touch wellbutrin since I have GAD. I take 150 mg of effexor with 2 mg of klonopin. only combo that works well for me. Its not perfect but I know its the closest to being normal I can be with the disorder I have. Without them, I dont function. Joyce
  14. I have been on effexor and klonopin for 9 years now. I tried to get off them a few times and relapsed. I get physical symptoms from GAD and I cant function when I'm in that place. I just tried hormone replacment therapy (bio identical) in the last 2 weeks and started lowering my ADs and klonopin dosage. I tought I was to snap. I became impatient, highly anxious and really tired. I am 53 so I am in my perimenopause which is the reason why I tried the HRT. Weeellll, I prefer ADs. My anxiety is out of control anyway if I dont take meds. I anticipate the worst in about everything which stop me from being productive. One of my aunt is in her 70s and started Effexor xr and she said it was a miracle for her so I do not think taking ADs even long term is a problem. The only thing is I have gained alot of weight but that is mostly due to my diet. I know it but its hard to change it. I am less afraid of ADs than HRT. AS HRT can cause breat cancer, uterus cancer, etc... After 2 weeks of HRT I'm back to effexor and klonopin (the dosage I was on when feeling well) and already feeling better. Aint going back to HRT. But I know that I will take my meds for the rest of my life. I dont mind. The feeling of anticipation is alot under control and I can cope with life stress much better. Otherwise my emotions controls me. And it aint pretty
  15. Been taking effexor xr for almost 9 years now. Well, went off it for about a year but went back on it. long story. Only AD that works for me. I had to upper the dosage recently as my mom passed away on June 22 and I lost my job of 9 years on July 21. When it rain,, it pours! :verysad3: So I am right now trying 150 mg of effexor xr. I used to take 37mg or 75 mg top! I tried to go back down but I could not function. I am seeing my psychiatrist again on August 16. He was on holidays when I lost my mom and job. I called him and went to see him 3 days later. We will see. As for benzos, I have been taking klonopin for almost 9 years now on a daily basis and never had to go over 2 mg and 2 mg are real bad days. It is usually between 1 to 1.5 mg. I used to take at least 2 mg when I got sick first 9 years ago but than I went down and never ever had to upper the dosage. I need klonopin to control my anxiety symptoms. I would not take it otherwise. I dont get a high on it. It prevents my anxiety to get out of control and get physical symptoms. Benzos get a bad wrap because some people might not really need them and start abusing them. I wished I did not have to take any meds at all and I tried over and over to get off or lower the dosage but always need to go back. But after 9 years I have never had to need more and more klonopin.