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Posts posted by HeatherG

  1. My heart breaks reading your post.  Wow, how people can be so cruel.

    This is the year to get to know YOU.  Find your worth, because YOU are worthy and don't you dare let anyone tell you differently.

    Loving yourself takes work, I wish someone had told me this years ago.  Once you like, love yourself, you won't let anyone abuse you.

    As far as that job, yes it's SO hard to find employment right now.  But the boyfriend's family, and the fact you have your own place can be

    a blessing--but the boyfriend living at home with parents that verbally abuse you?  You can ask yourself why you're dealing with this, why

    not decide that if you can't walk through the front door--that home isn't worth visiting.  Even if you're boyfriend loves you, please say to yourself,

    "Why am I going through a doggy door?"  "Why would I listen to someone tell me that my job isn't a good job?"  "Why do I listen to people judge me?

    I went through ALL of that, and today, no more.  Never again.  You sound like a lovely person, so start treating yourself like that.

  2. When I started liking myself, approving of myself, thinking highly of myself--I did not need the validation of anybody else.

    Hey, this took me years!  Because I use to live by everybody else's approval or rejection--this just aggravated my depression.

    You're seeking outside approval, which will keep you down.  Upset.

    You have a husband, baby, I hope some family and some good friends.  You may never get an answer on why you've been rejected, do you want to spend your life wondering why,  when they probably aren't thinking of you.  Hey, sounds harsh, but this was told to me and I still didn't get it.

    You sound sensitive and I love that--this world needs sensitive people.  But sensitive people wear their hearts on their sleeves and we, you, always get hurt.  And that hurt lingers.

    The best revenge is to be happy.  I don't know if you're near maybe a therapist to help boost your self-esteem.  I speak to mine every week.  And yes, swim, read, write, puzzles, play with your baby, spend time one on one with the hubby when the baby naps.  And speak with us, reach out to healthy friends!  They won't just block you and not tell you why.  Real friends act like real friends.  

    Stay lovely, and I wish you the best!  And sending virtual hugs!  🙂

  3. 38 minutes ago, nothing_man said:

     My friend passed away hours ago 😢

     I'm far away from them, this coronavirus stuff has the long distance busses stopped, and it's and was impossible for me to get there.

     It breaks my hearth, knowing the kind of person she was. I have a lot to learn from this life.

    I'm so sorry for your loss.  I send **hugs**

  4. 14 hours ago, Andromeda08 said:

    I'm sorry for posting the same thing again, wasn't my attention. Still trying to understand how this functions 😊

    Thank @RichW and @HeatherG. I do agree. Although I'd like to see it the other way, I somehow think it would never go again. No matter what I do, or what stage I am at..whether I feel more content in my everyday life or not, it will always exist somewhere deep down. 

    I do feel slightly different than 2 years back when it all hit the tip of the ice berg, it was the stage I spent in bed whining and moaning feeling as everything inside is tearing in two. The moment I started amusing myself with the idea of scratching an old wound, I realized this is it... This is what I watched in movies; called a psychiatrist and got some medications. 

    It got better since then but every once in while I can feel the same dark, the same feeling of inadequacy, of being a pathetic looser where everything around me is BS. 

    You get the point. 

    I guess it's all about finding the things to keep you above the water, like you said. I still haven't found the right combination, though. 

    I'll keep on trying. That's the only thing most of us can do 

    😊Glad I found you 











    You seem to be on the right road.  Searching.  Good.  Talking to someone, and if medication helps.  Good.  Now, how about being kinder to yourself, see?  Being nicer and more patient?  I had too.  No more saying pathetic loser, you're NOT.  Words are very powerful, watch the words you say to yourself.  Call yourself good.  Nice.  Intelligent.  Kind.  Fair.  Change the way you think about yourself, I sure am.  And yeah it's work, it's not easy.  We're so programmed to, belittle ourselves.  And I'm tired of treating myself this way.  So, you're on the right road.  Now be kind to yourself and let's all survive, no, THRIVE in this most tough year.  🙂

  5. For me, a great therapist  (we talk every week, sometimes zoom in).  Getting away from people who trigger me.  I hate to say it, but family can be a big trigger (for me) and I had to put my foot down so now I'm the bad person--and now I don't care.  My emotional health is a priority.

    There's so much that goes into trying to keep depression at bay.  Also, since I think it ran unchecked in both my parents/hereditary, I too wonder is it always going to linger in the back?  I read a lot, try to do what I enjoy, I'm VERY careful who I am around.  I must say I have two pastors that call and check on me, but I hate bringing up religion, ya know? 

    Sometimes I just need to be alone, probably a lot.  At work it's super hard to control who you're around, so I have to try to find a job where there's not a lot of people--again, these are things I can't control.  But again and again, I try.  But yeah, I too hate and wonder, where it always be there?  And again, I'm super grateful when I see beautiful flowers, hear a great piece of music, movies, books, a painting.  Nature.  Peace.  Quiet.  Laughter.  Meeting a kind person!  I appreciate everything.

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