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Everything posted by HeatherG

  1. That would scare me, too. Have you reached out to law enforcement, friends, family-- letting them know your concerns and worries? Speaking to someone in law enforcement about how to make yourself safe? I don't know what their like, law enforcement, so, but I'd try to find someone who appears to care. Tighten locks, windows, set up security cameras. There are places (I hear) that can offer advice on how to use pepper spray, etc. Change your route. Reach out to as many people as you can-- letting them know about your fears.
  2. I wish I knew more.  Like just about life.  People.  

  3. Yesterday I spoke to my sister and brother-- oh boy. Like I'm asking to be kicked and verbally attacked. I can't make myself stop reaching out to them. When they're so verbally abusive and triggering to me. I'm the oldest and feel this need to keep watch and check on them. And all I get is abuse. God, keep me from calling them! I'm working on something that makes me feel positive. Then I call them...
  4. I am so sorry you are dealing with this. And I hope I can offer just somethings that come to my mind. But have you reached out to a licensed psychiatrist/therapist? Forgive me, but maybe a crisis line? Or your doctor? I don't know where you are residing, alone or with someone-- but seeking help from a trusted doctor, therapist, or crisis center or a social services agency? Forgive me, but I wanted to reach out to you. I'm sorry I'm not on here that much, but I wish you safety, peace of mind and someone to aid and help you. Reporting what's happening to you can be helpful. Medication to ease the thoughts and voices can be helpful. And speaking to someone about being physically safe.. Bless you.
  5. 🌸 a flower for you.

    Hope you're okay

    1. Hertz


      Hey Heather, thank you for the flower 🙂
      Can't complain too much lately. Meditation has been helping. We're having a nice summer here, not too hot, some rain but sunny days too. I hope you're doing okay

    2. HeatherG


      Thank you Hertz.

      I'm feeling blessed.

      I'm glad the medication is helping.  You are in my thoughts and prayers 🙂

  6. *hugs*

    1. gandolfication


      I just logged in here for the first time in a while, and saw this.  I needed it.  Thanks.
      I hope you're having a good Friday.

    2. HeatherG


      Hi Gandolfication,

      Sorry it takes me awhile to log back in here.  I think you know exactly how it feels to feel bogged down.  

      Oh my goodness it's been over a month!  😞

      As I say to myself (and to you), just keep on keeping on.  When the bad comes, cry, scream (I've actually gone into a basement and broken glass--course protecting my eyes.)  I clean it up afterwards of course.  Then I feel the guilt, "What if someone steps on the glass?"  Wow see how quickly I go into a roll and find something to feel bad about.?  Ugh.  Oh, depression.  But I'm doing a lot better, a LOT.  I joined a church, found a nice friend. A female friend 🙂

      My sister is kinda mean.  So any nice female friend surprises me.

      I send you more hugs!  This is my safe place.  Because of people like YOU!

      Oh your interests are fascinating!  

      Hugs, snuggles, cuddles,



  7. I feel better today.  Thanks Everybody/Fam.  🙂

  8. I intended to clean half the dining rm table, which I call my little office. Part of my personality is, clean house, organized thoughts--I feel better. It works. I love a clean organized house. So, I cleaned it all. I feel so much better! And to everyone who responded to my rant, you're so kind. Thank you. I might erase that rant, if I can. I pray I don't cause anyone to doubt or doubt more. I kind of feel like you all are my brothers and sisters on here. I like that. If God is molding me for something greater, it's gonna be BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIG BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIG. lol
  9. Hope you're okay 🙂

    1. sober4life


      I'm ok.  I hope you're doing well too @HeatherG

    2. HeatherG


      Hi Honey,

      I'm just now logging in.  

      I'm feeling blessed.

      I'm glad you're ok.

      You are a nice presence on here.  People like you make this my safe place.  Thank you.



  10. Wow do I know how you're feeling. We trust our therapist and want/need to believe we're not just another patient/client. I do hope you find better options. You deserve it! You deserve too!! Hold on.
  11. Dear JD4010, I needed to read this. Thank you my dear brother. Thank you so much. -Heather
  12. I try so hard to have faith. Faith in God. I can't go back to pleading with Him. I can't go back to wondering, are you there? Or, do you not like or love me? This whole year has been sh*t. Please excuse my language. What does He want me to do? Why am I here? Why am I here? Why? Am I being punished for something? I'm actually in a fam who blames me for not having faith. How do I have faith in a God that watches people, me, you, suffer? Why do WE have depression? Now, since I'm complaining about God, is He going to strike me? Again? Oh, God. I'm sorry if I've spoiled anybody's day with this rant. My apologies. Really.
  13. The heartbreak. I wish I could send comfort, to everyone on here who has lost a beloved family member-- because it goes beyond just a pet. Grief, take all the time you need. Mourn in the way you need to mourn. Let me know, or us, know how you're doing, and remind yourself that YOU loved, YOU cared, YOU gave your family member a home, you've been a blessing! I send virtual hugs.
  14. I'm going to be extra sensitive here. Being a female... Have you tried being friends with women? Whether their attractive or unattractive? And, since you made what you worded ugly comments that hurt her feelings.... Have you tried enjoying just being by yourself and getting to know yourself? And ask yourself why those words came out of your mouth to a woman you seemed to want to be with? I'm glad I've never been anxious to get in a relationship. Why do you seem to be? And as you stated meeting women in church -- being a Christian myself, my humble opinion-- maybe focus on being friends with women in church? Friends first? That emptiness inside of you, you should fill. That emptiness, God should fill. And then, maybe a woman you've befriended may become more. I hope I am being sensitive in my response. I do understand many people long for a loving deep relationship and connection. Going back to therapy, maybe? Learn to love yourself first. I wish you the very best.
  15. Congratulations on your new job! I hope it works out for you, and you're able to make some extra money. Check in with us and let us know how things are going.
  16. Hi, MikeJS, Welcome, welcome. My thoughts are, while doing your homework (always good) why not talk/speak with your doctor now about this? In fact, speak to him about your financial worries, that this medication is so helpful, are there alternatives, are there any offers of free supplies? Sounds like you have a good doctor, I hope he can ease your worries.
  17. Had my church service over the phone with my small fam. Didn't know it is Palm Sunday, but so nice one of my pastor's brought me a palm leaf. Nice to be thought of, ya know? Finishing up some writing. Got bad news in the mail on Friday-- I'm going to choose to not care, trying not to worry. I do pray every morning now, I'm scared not to. I send love to everyone. I remember when I first logged on, so many MANY kind people. Thank you for making me feel, know, I'm not alone.
  18. Hi Evalynn, Real good to see you I hope you feel better.
  19. Always like checking your page 🙂

    1. Hertz


      Hello Heather, I hope you are doing alright 🙂

    2. HeatherG


      I am.  Thank you, Hertz.  I hope you are doing well.  :flowers:

    3. HeatherG


      Hope you're okay. 

  20. I really need to find a way off this planet.  😁

  21. Up in the wee hours of the morning. I have an assignment I want to finish, but gotta go with my brother to the hospital this morning. He would never go with me or care about me if I was in his shoes. But he was really sick recently.. And I have that caretaker personality. Make sure my nephew gets safely to school. I could cry all day if I had the energy. So, that's how I feel right now. Wait, i did have some prayers answered. I'm just needing that extra oophmf. Now I"m rambling.
  22. It is a sad day. I send hugs to everyone on here.
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