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captain_right

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  1. Dose keeps on increasing

    thanks for the reply. I'm on Fluoxetine. I'm not comfortable around the stigma of having a mental disease - in my case anti-depressant. I'm not sure if I told my employer i'm taking anti-depressant they will most like not hire me. If i tell my future life partner i'm taking med or depression they will probably not feel comfortable. Having heard the news of recent suicide of celebrities who have been in medication makes me uncomfortable - it makes me think may be, eventually i will be on same path. I'm nor sure if this depression is clinical or trauma related. Though I didn't have the best childhood I think I wasn't depressed during my teen & early 20s. I'm mid 20s.
  2. Should I quit as my job triggers my depression

    Bad job do give me feel of guilt and worthless ness. i have left jobs with in month or less. This actually kicked my esteem harder tan doing the job. I'm still into job I like. I'm in med and it does help shield negative thoughts. If you do that work you like you are less like to see it as a job.
  3. Dose keeps on increasing

    9months ago I started with dose of 20mg, the dose increased to 30 after 5months and currently i'm taking dose for 40mg. I'm worried with this increase in dose. Though lots of symptoms seems to have gone I still struggle with few symptoms like of anxiety. I 've been trying really hard to socialize and be as normal as possible. I do go out with friends. And since most of them are into smoking and drinking I'm too dragged into this habit. I tried but couldn't get rid of these habits. I get worried about having hooked to med forever
  4. May be just cherry picking but I think depression is increasing with time. With in this year, I heard the number of death particularly due to suicide. Chester (Linking Park) & Chris Connel (Soundgarden) died as a result of suicide. 3 of my friends - though they are not very close - they were more like casual friends died of suicide. I rarely used to hear about suicide back then. there was 1, few years ago in my neighborhood. Sometimes it makes me sad and makes me think I will end up like this. One of the friends looked really happy as normal as before a week I met him. Things look so normal then suddenly they person kills himself/herself. Do people just snap into it and think they will **** themselves? I have seen people making a plan for future yet he kills himself.
  5. zombie

    i'm in a different brand of fluxotine. how ever it's effect on me has been mostly postive and I feel normal like i was back then. may be you should talk about it.
  6. Personality Change

    i'm in 30mg (from 20mg). The change in feeling and thinking is noticeable. However I'm putting up lots of weight..
  7. Back then I didn't know much about depression. For me, depression was just feeling sad. Without knowing, I have been struggling for almost a year. It kept getting worse, i had constant suicidal thoughts and guilty feeling since I opened my eyes in morning. There was a time, I went to stranger's room say ceiling fan and first thing on my mind was "can i hang myself", I would see down from my room and think will I die if i throw myself from here? I felt like the failure and couldn't handle simple stress or task. Finally, I went to the doctor, i was diagnosed with moderate depression and started with 20mg for fluoxetine, i took it for around 5months, not it 30mg :(. But I can clearly and vividly sort the difference in me - before & after medication. I didn't knew depression was this complicated and more than just a feeling. Still, i have a fear that i may have to take medication forever but I have determination I will over come. When I was told I have depression at first, I would rather imagine ending myself or being a burden to everyone. My emotion and behavior have changed radically. I sometimes still try to remember good old days and try to evaluate myself. I realized I have never been fully happy or had excitement. There was a time when I would get excited when I get a message from the crush. I hope one day i will be able to live on without any medication.
  8. From 20mg to 30mg Fluoxetine, is it bad? I'm worried

    thank you. I have this flow of negative vibes most of the time. Though it is limited after taking medication :)
  9. i'm doing master. i was diagnosed when i was in mid of program. i wanted to dropout and delt i will never be able to complete. but i didn't quit. it does help me to keep me somewhat active and be social.
  10. Little back story, I had depression for more than a year. I didn't know it was depression and avoid going to doctor. I thought it will go away with time and everything will be back to normal. But it kept going worse, so finally, I went to the doctor and she diagnosed me with moderate depression. I was taking 20mg Fluoxetine since about 5months. I have been visiting physicist once in 2month. Yesterday, I visited the doctor for follow up. According to her, though there is progress in my situation, the progress wasn't enough and I was prescribed additional 10mg i.e 30mg Fluoxetine once day. Is it normal? Is it because I told her I still sometimes have suicidal thoughts? I'm afraid I'm building up the tolerance and it might ruin me/my health. Till date, 20mg had been working good. Probably cured 70% of my depression and I can find the clear difference.