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Wistfully

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  1. This thread has been great to read.Thanks to everyone who shared. what I currently find the most helpful: Medication- I'm one of those depressed/anxious people who needs medication to function.I've made my peace with this.Right now I am currently on 150 mg of zoloft which is helping tremendously.I still struggle at times but I'm no longer glued to the bed crying all day. Therapy Exercise - Any exercise helps but the harder I go the better I feel.On days when I can manage to push myself to work out until I'm a hot,sweaty,mess gasping on the floor I feel amazing! I rarely manage to push myself this hard though.Im happy if I hit the goal on my pedometer which is 10,000 steps. keeping a gratitude journal.- I fought against doing this for a long time.It seemed hokey and a waste of time.Finally, I had a therapist who managed to convince me how important keeping track of the positive was.I was instructed to write any positive no matter how tiny.Once I got going with it I realized how powerful it was.I don't always write in it as much as I should but when I do I always feel better.it is especially helpful for those days when I feel as if the world and everyone in it is conspiring against me. Spending time in nature especially the ocean.I find the ocean incredibly soothing. Pushing myself out of the house on a regular basis. Socializing- Because of the depression and anxiety every friendship I've ever had has withered away.I really think the isolation I experience is one of the reasons the depression never fully goes away.I'm currently working on changing this but it's hard as hell. Going to twelve step meetings on the phone- While it's not the same as being around people in person they have helped me quite a bit. Distraction- Sometimes the best thing I can do is to distract myself from whatever is currently upsetting me.When I'm really depressed this doesn't work but if the upset is more mild in nature,it really helps.
  2. Hey.I've been reading these boards for a long time but I think the time has finally come to seek out support.I've been struggling with depression and anxiety since the age of 14. I'm 43 now so yeah,it's been a long,often brutal struggle.It's reached a point where I have accepted that I most likely will always be depressed and/or anxious to one degree or another. Right now I'm going through a period where I am only slightly depressed.The depression is there but I can function and leave the house and I sometimes even laugh and enjoy myself.I'm able to delve into my hobbies and interests once again which means that for me I'm doing really well.If I manage to keep the depression at this level for a length of time I'll be happy.In the last few years I've dealt with some severe,extended bouts of depression so I'm grateful for where I'm currently at. Having struggled with mental illness for so long has helped to clarify certain things for me.I'm beginning to catch on to the patterns and the behaviors that lead to an escalation of the depression.One of the main culprits is rumination.It has been pointed out to me for several years by therapists and family members alike that ruminating endlessly was keeping my depression alive.I never believed them but I now see they were correct. It's almost as if I have an addiction to going over unpleasant,upsetting events in my head endlessly.No slight either real,sometimes imagined,is too small for me to replay over and over again on a constant loop.No wonder I'm depressed! Does anyone else struggle with this as well? Has anyone been able to cut back on the constant negative thoughts? Any tips,advice,etc. would be appreciated.Thanks.
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