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Lumen last won the day on January 20 2017

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  1. Maybe you should socialize a bit more, I'm sure that there are some nice fellows in your age bracket around, maybe you'll be able to find a boyfriend. Even if that doesn't happen so soon, you can have good times with people, boys and girls, and they might also want to hug.
  2. I Dental hygene is very important, I've had countless problems, including root canals, at least six teeth had to be pulled, have glued-in bridges, several stand-alone crowns and ultra-expensive implants. I would suggest creating a daily ritual, to make it more interesting and effective. I brush with a regular toothbrush, then use dental floss, and finally a Water Flosser, by waterpik. The warterpik device isn't necessary for you as you probably don't have all the problems I have, but it really makes your mouth feel fresh, especially if you rinse with some mouthwash after everything is done. Believe me, it pays off in the end when you go to the dentist and all you need is a cleaning.
  3. I'd suggest asking for some anti-anxiety med to use until you get used to the Zoloft. I did it that way, with a generic Zoloft (Sertraline) about 12 years ago, it worked well and I took the Z for one year. I tried a different generic version Zolof in the summer of 2016, with no anti-anxiety meds, and had to stop after a few days.
  4. That must have been a terrible experience, but at least your vision symptoms have gone.
  5. My wife has been the caregiver for her aging parents, her father died about 12 years ago but her mother is still alive. She uses a website called agingcare. It has all kinds of information about caregiving, support, etc., not just for caring for elderly people. There are probably websites with message boards for family members of cancer patients. Hope this helps.
  6. I'm very sorry to hear what you're going through. I know what this is like, and how the shock just seems like to much too bear by yourself, but there are ways of coping with such circumstances, that you can find in psychology behavior workbooks and perhaps online. Your husband is no doubt very concerned also, but may feel that his role is to be more stoic, like a foundation for you. You're a good daughter, and have done more than your share of giving compassionate, loving kindness to your parent(s). Best of luck to you and your loved ones.
  7. Just take it slow, nobody's perfect. A woman I know met a 50 year old man who was almost killed in a car crash (some time before they met). He had to be airlifted to a hospital, can't work, numerous surgeries on what little is left of his legs - you get the picture, yet she is very much involved and none of his problems have discouraged her. Just don't give up!
  8. Don't over-analyze it, just be happy that she's interested - that's enough. My wife doesn't like beards much, and I never had one while I've been with her, but it wouldn't have been a deal breaker if I'd wanted to grow one when we met, or now. Maybe you're better looking without the beard, to her, but I don't think it's anything to worry about. I'm sure that you look fine with or w/o a beard, to her and most anybody else.
  9. Many women like quiet guys, and most talk more than men. This is not meant in any way to be a slight against women, just an observation - vive la différence.
  10. It's good to date somebody that's different from yourself, such as the introvert/extrovert thing, at least that's what I've found to work out best.
  11. She sounds very nice. There's good people out there, to find them you just have to have patience, and give it the old college try. Good luck.
  12. I don't think it's at all important to apologize, I've avoided my closest relatives for years, I just can't take it. If they need help, I'd be there, but I don't want to socialize or get involved with their personal lives and problems because they do not take my advice, even though they were the ones who asked. Basically, we have our limits as too how much we can take, and it's not our fault.
  13. Use cognitive methods to get over your insecurities and fears, and retrain your brain. It works, costs nothing more than the price of a couple of books, some of which are online or available from the library for free. They have exercises and methods that are guaranteed to change your thinking, but it takes work. The good news is, it always gets easier after the beginning hurdles are jumped. Text messages, though useful and fun, are not really a very good indicator of mood, compatibility, etc. There's no body language, no tone of voice, eye contact, etc.
  14. Yeah, comments like "Don't drink too much" on Labor Day mean nothing to most people, they'll consider it to be a joke or, more likely, not even think about it. She obviously seems to like you, so try not to over-analyze things, that type of thinking is the wrong way to approach it. You're just looking to have some fun, if something comes out of it long-term, fine, if not just enjoy yourself and move on.
  15. Was this a text message or something like that? Sometimes writing can sound like an "attitude", but if you were with her it wouldn't be a problem. Even the phone can depersonalize. I'd forget about it and just try to be very agreeable in the meantime, that's the best approach.
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