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Posts posted by NoraRae

  1. I honestly didn't expect to be back here for awhile. Things have been so much better for me for such a long time. But now, I've come to a very difficult time with my teenager that has rocked me to the core. I feel broken, unbelievably hurt, and lost. The most important person in my life has hurt me beyond belief. MY KID/TEENAGER! Never in my life have I been cursed at, yelled at, vulgarity spewed at, as I have recently experienced with my 16 yr old. I tried so hard to keep my cool during this "meltdown" on her part. I even tried to distance myself so all parties could calm down. But my teenager continued to follow me and spew such vulgarities! It has rocked me to my core. I have never been so hurt, confused, and frustrated. I don't know what to do. But I have scheduled time with a counselor for both my teenager and I. I'm not trying to be selfish. Obviously my kid has a lot going on in her head that we need to hash out. But this recentl prLedicament has put me in a tailspin to regress with my own depression and axiety. I am now personally struggling within as well as hurting for my child and all the hurt she is feelling. I feel lost, frustrated, and need help. I want to help my daughter, how do I help fix her own anguish, hurt, and hate.  Then I feel guilty for how I feel on a personal level. I am SO unbelievably hurt by her words. She is the MOST important person in my life. I would do anything for.  And I feel destroyed. I shouldn't be focusing on myself, but her anguish. But I CANT discount what this has done to ME and my own personal struggles. I don't know what to do. I have never in my life felt so much pain as I do now. I want to be there for my daughter, but to do that I NEED TO BE THERE. I dunno, maybe this is just me rambling.

  2. Hey. Sorry your back for obvious reasons, but the upside is there are others with the same kind of struggles. I seem to be up and down myself and pop on here randomly. It's hard when things are low and its nice to have somewhere to turn at least to vent or something. Hang in there and fingers crossed for an upswing for both of us.


    • I can't speak to the level Adderall will help or hurt, but it is a definite drug that can have neg or pos side effects. When my daughter was diagnosed with ADHD we tried Adderall for the first option, but it didn't really work for her. She still spaced and couldn't focus on what was in front of her. But that doesn't mean things got easier after the fACT. We went thru meds increase but they didn't really work for her . We actually ended up trying different avenues.
  3. Hey all! I am having a down kinda day. I'm not even really sure why. Woke up that way. I know I've recently hit the big 40 and my sister in law is going to be 40 soon. So we were planning this girls trip in May, but now she's kinda getting ify about it. I had something to look forward to, but now its "on hold". So, I'm down about that, but I other than that, I'm not sure why today sucks so much. It just does. I'm not holed up in bed, either. I'm ansy and feel like I need to be doing something... cleaning, laundry, a project, I dunno. SOMETHING! I'm just in a funk, I guess, and have NO idea how to get out of it? Any suggestions?

  4. I've been trying to do what is require on this site, regarding posting. I miss having the ability to join the chat conversation. So I have been weighing in on some of the blogs. Don't get me wrong. I totally believe what I've said. But sometimes I don't have a lot more to say other than being understanding and empathic. I will continue to "speak" to those blogs that touch me, but in the interim, would anyone be willing to help me get to the 20 post min. for the chat requirements.

  5. Hello! Hang in there, first and foremost. I completely understand that feeling of needing to "feel free". I want that more than anything, too. I don't really have any advice to give, but can offer a shoulder or an ear. This disease that we share, can be crippling if we let it. And we do, unless we have the support of others to conquer it. I offer you that support. Anytime.. any day... any moment.  Vent, scream, cry...laugh...jump for joy.. or collapse in sorrow, I've been there and will be there for you, if I can. It'll never be easy, but that's the beauty of sites like this. We all have a place we can come to that can offer solice.

  6. I hate and love the holidays. They stress me out big time. I spend so much time trying to orchestrate on where to go, when we have to go, and meet all expectations, I feel like I miss out on what the true meaning of the holiday is. I just want to be able to relax and enjoy them, without feeling like I've disappointed someone by not being where they want me to be. I love my family, but it is so hard when our family is so split and I also have to work with my daughter's dad to make sure everyone has a "holiday".

    Sometimes I just can't wait for the holiday time to be over so its one less thing I have to worry about. But whatever, we make it through.

    Sometimes I have to be selfish to be able to allow myself the sanity to say its ok  not to do everything everyone wants me to. I dunno. Fingers crossed this year runs smoothly. So far so good, but  as usual I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop.


  7. Absolutely! It sucks how it can be so easy to forget the good things, but the bad things just won't go way. We are human, so we will undoubtedly make mistakes. I have had my fair share. A lot I wish I could forget forever, but still haunt me from time to time.

    I don't think there is any magic to obsolve us, other than basic faith. However, even then we can forgive but not forget. I really believe in, Time CAN heal all wounds. Sometimes its the time that helps lesson the memory of sadness, sometimes is time that makes us stronger, and sometimes there are other factors. We just HAVE to take time for ourselves, learn ourselves, be patient with ourselves and others.

  8. Holiday's are always SO hard. I feel you with that. For me it gets hard trying to meet all the "obligations" and make everyone happy. Sometimes I feel like I miss out on being able to relax and enjoy holiday time since I'm so stressed about making sure I see everyone possible. UGH. So frustrating. Sometime it makes me wish I was thousand miles away so I didn't have to make so many concessions. Don't get me wrong, I love my family and want to be with them, but like so many our family is fractured so I feel pulled into so many different directions.

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