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Everything posted by LouisRiel

  1. I am turning 30 soon on permanent disability and Full of racing thoughts and regret of all the years I lost which was the majority of this before some the the most recent ones blah.
  2. Not stable enough to work and agoraphobic so can’t leave my home
  3. All the alcohol, but I am not ****ing my life up more just to survive the rest of Thanksgiving weekend.
  4. Smoothie like concoction with instant coffee because I hate mornings and slept under 4 hours
  5. From what I can decipher from my Fitbit I woke up just before 4am ugh. Not tired and haven’t slept a healthy amount in a few days. Things are getting done, but I am fighting to pace myself and not chase a high.
  6. A new desk chair. All my wheels are pretty much broken.
  7. Fearing burnout while I attempt to keep myself busy waiting for news risking overexertion.
  8. #HowIGotThroughHighSchool is trending.. Undiagnosed, rapid cycling, silent sobbing panic attacks at my table, bathroom stall, hallway, hypomanic blackout rage till sobbing, and dropping out.
  9. Always such a struggle to decide at that point. I stayed up for about 30 hours from Thursday evening to about midnight today and then had very broken sleep till 5am when I think I woke up for good. I have reached an age where my body punishes me for being up that second day, so any sleep is better than none. Good news: I also recognized the upswing and avoided a full on episode for now Bad news: I want caffeine bitch, but could undo that. Also I ran out of OTC pain meds for this pain.
  10. Trying to secure funding to return to school. I don’t want to waste another year of my life waiting. I need lectures, passion, and discussion.
  11. Eggs, seafood, nearly all cooked vegetables, pickles, aspartame, and any jarred, canned, or frozen vegetable
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