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About Shacke

  • Birthday 05/19/1998

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  1. Exactly what you said, you don't really know who you are. And that's ok. At some point, you might even think that depression is just a part of who you are. It ain't. So, figure out who you wanna be. Then figure out how to get there
  2. You didn't answer the question though... Who are you?
  3. This I used to struggle with this. But over time, I learned how, AND WHY, to love myself.Never looked back ever since. I was able to be single for months and never even feel lonely.It's not easy lesson to learn, but it might as well save your life. Or at least make you happy
  4. yeah, sure. Let's just all **** ourselves then, because we all need to suffer throughout the life, and this is so scary and it's much easier to just **** ourselves. Humanity, billions of years of evolution? Nah, **** that, let's just **** ourselves here and now. You say your life will only suck more as long as you keep livibg like this. So, change the way you live. What's the big ****ing deal here? YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR EVERYTHING GOING ON IN YOUR LIFE. It might not always be your fault, but it is always your responsibility. So yeah, you can just shift the blame and cry about world being unfair and you getting crewed up on a deal with life (which you aren't), or you can do something about it. Give yourself a couple of years, hopefully you'll come around
  5. If every day is the same, make sure you do something new. Here's a little thing I did that saved my life: Go face one fear every day. Like, today I'm gonna approach cute girl at the bus. Tomorrow I'm gonna do push ups in the middle of the busy street. And so on. It takes away monotony completely. You say you don't have motivation? Good. Motivation is for losers. What do you think, would professional athletes be where they are if they trained only when they felt motivated? **** no. If you are motivated, great, it will be easier. If not, **** it, it's not gonna be easy, but it has to be done Not good enough at what you do? Go online, find out how to get better. Try harder. Work harder. Work smarter. There is no secret or shortcut in life. Either you are gonna put in the work, or you won't. But you're gonna suffer, regardless if you try hard or not. Only difference will be, what do you have to show for all that suffering
  6. I don't think many of you will remember me, but that doesn't really matter. I started struggling with depression when I was around 15. Took me around 4 years to learn how to menage, and eventually beat it, so I can try to shed some light on this for you. I remember saying almost exact same words you are saying right now, and let me tell you, you're on a ride through hell that hopefully, will turn you into much greater person one day. Now, before I tell you anything, let me warn you. Nothing I say is suppose to make you feel better. That's not my aim here. You will probably hate me for some things I am about to say, but that's allright. So, if you are not ready for harsh truth, please don't read any further. So, let's go down the rabbit hole, shall we? Imagine one morning you wake up and your tooth hurts. What do you do? Ah, no big deal, it's just a toothache. You take a painkiller, gulp it down with a glass of water and it stops hurting. Few days later, you feel it again, just a bit stronger. Same deal, another painkiller, pain is gone, you are fine. And it goes like that for a month. Then, when painkillers stop working, you finally decide to go to the dentist, and he tells you your tooth is completely rotten, and he needs to pull it out. Ouch, that sucks. In case you didn't figure it out, that pain I'm talking about is depression. And painkillers I mentioned are antidepressives, drugs, alcohol, you name it. They will help you deal with stuff temporarely, but will do nothing for you on a long term plan. Depression is just a simptom that something else, much bigger, is wrong with your current lifestyle. So, question is, what exactly? I like to split inter personal relationships in three categories and look at them separately: -Family life -Friendships -Love life From what you said, your family is pretty much falling apart, and doesn't seem to be much you can do it. So this part kinda sucks Friendships, although you did say you have many friends, and you're in figh with your best friend, which might be contributing factor. Love life you didn't mention, so I can't go in there. Here, things don't seem to be thag bad, right? A few inperfections, sure, but shouldn't make you feel miserable So, we come to next thing: Who are you, and how do you see yourself? That's very important question, and I'd like you to reply it if you cared to read all the way till here. You'll hear from me
  7. Arkansas, Article 19, Section 1: Atheists disqualified from holding office or testifying as witness.No person who denies the being of a God shall hold any office in the civil departments of this State, nor be competent to testify as a witness in any Court. There are more examples than that but you get the point. Could you imagine if there were laws like this in place against Christians? There would be an uproar, and rightly so. But it's so horribly slanted the other way. I think this stems from a lot of religious people feeling insulted by the existence of atheists. At worst an atheist may judge a religious person as foolish or illogical. At worst a religious person may judge an atheist to be immoral and untrustworthy. One of the largest studies on this subject matter in recent years was conducted by the University of Minnesota in 2006 and found the following: This group does not at all agree with my vision of American society... Atheist: 39.6% Muslims: 26.3% Homosexuals: 22.6% Hispanics: 20% Conservative Christians: 13.5% Recent Immigrants: 12.5% Jews: 7.6% I would disapprove if my child wanted to marry a member of this group.... Atheist: 47.6% Muslim: 33.5% African-American 27.2% Asian-Americans: 18.5% Hispanics: 18.5% Jews: 11.8% Conservative Christians: 6.9% Whites: 2.3% Did you know that in a research study done by Will M. Gervais, Azim F. Shariff, and Ara Norenzayan, published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology people were given the description of an "immoral school teacher" and asked to assign which group this person most likely belonged to? You know what the results were? Teacher & Christian: 4% Teacher & Muslim: 15% Teacher & Rapist: 46% Teacher & Atheist: 48% TRUSTED LESS THAN RAPISTS, for no other reason than they don't believe in god. This seems to be quite similar to what is happening here. The mere idea that someone is an atheist is "divisive" and "threatening" to a Christian or other religious adherent is troubling to me. How awful that someone who believes in god and is seeking help might come to a forum of support and find that some people who don't believe in god have a thread in dealing with how they face depression in the face of godlessness. That wouldn't be good for their depression! But an atheist who comes here, searching for support and finds a thread for religious individuals who don't agree with them? That's no big deal. I mean, it's not like being religious or an atheist could have a profound effect on the lens through which you view yourself and your depression right? Surely it wouldn't be insulting to an atheist that they can't go to a forum in which they can discuss their depression without someone offering them solutions like "pray, go to church, give god a chance to work his plan before you despair".... TLDR: Deleting a non religious forum but not deleting religious forums is a double standard... but it's also a common one. Atheists are one of the last groups where discrimination is generally "acceptable" on the whole. It's disappointing that these forums don't seem to be exempt from this. Shouldn't answers like "Go pray" or something similar be reported or something? Spam, you know? I mean, they aren't productive, they are simple solution that religious people would already try, and basically worthless as an answer. Like telling them "Go and be happy", except it's worse if person is not religious
  8. Well, atheist can be both agnostic and gnostic, the same way ag ognostic can be both theist and atheist. They aren't i the same line. Gnostic and agnostic work with knowledge, while theis and atheist work with belifef. And honestly, I did make my cfirst ocomment without any checking on the forum, so I apologise for that. I generally dislike discussing religion, and get REALLY p***** off when people tell me "God will help you, you just need to believe" or something like that. I'd like if we could all discuss everything (includingt religion) here without jumpingg on each other about it or calling someone out on it, but we all know it's i mpossible. Yeah, it feels kinda discriminating to see Christia threads or whatever, but honestly, it doesn't really hurt me or (I believe) anyon e aelse.As long as they aren't coming to my treads and commenting "just believe in God" I'm ok with it
  9. Honestly, I support the idea I was never really discriminated in any way because of my lack of b elief in God or anything, so I can't relate to that part, but I think we should be able to discuss our beliefs with like-minded people. And for campaing to have it closed, I'm not sure if it really happened or not, but it should never happen... not here
  10. 1. Yes, it is possible. I'm not sure if depression itself caused it, but I am one of those people who can't actually feel their emotions. You know emotion is there, but you can't really feel it. I'm not sure if it's depression, or consequence of depression, but yeah, it happens. What I am reffering to here isn't emotional numbness though. Emotional numbness is lack of ability to feel emotions altogether. In my case, I feel emotions, but more with logic than actual feelings. Like, I can recognize it like "I fell sad", but I am not really able to feel sadness and cry. It's really difficult to explain. 2. Here, what most people don't get, is when I push someone away, I actually want them to show they care enough to stay. It might sound like I am an a****** or whatever, but I want to see who cares about me enough to stay when I'm not feeling well, even though I tell them otherwise. I just want someone to see through all the disguise and when I tell them "I am ok", to say "Tell me the truth". On the other hand, once, when I had a friend who cared enough to ask me how I actually feel, I still pushed her away because I didn't want to drag her down with me. It's is really tricky situation to be in honestly. You want someone to care about you, yet when someone does, you care about them too much to expose them to all the negativity. Because, being around depressed people without proper knowledge of what you're doing, or without proper mental state, will drag you down. If you let yourself walk in their boots, it will affect your life. Kind the same thing what good psychologist/psychiatrist/therapist needs to know. How to understand someone without putting yourself in their place. You can't just go YOLO and try to accept her mindset. You need to keep proper distance in whole situation. Now, on the practical part, how to "be there for her": Well, first of all, let her know that she can count on you. That you are willing to listen to her struggles. Just having someone who is willing to pay enough attention and take aside part of their time and gift it to you means A LOT. In the world we live in, not many people has time to listen to others' struggles. Don't be one of those people. Also, I am warning you, her struggles might seem pointless or silly at times, but they are VERY real. Also, call her now and then (or send her message if you really don't have time. Still try to call if you can. Or even better, visit her in person) just to check on her. Just to see how she's doing. Same as the above, it means a lot that someone remembered you despite dealing with their own issues. I'd say, don't let her feel like she's needless or irrelevant. Please note, this is all just my opinion, and I am by no means expert on the case. Also, I told you what would help me, or some people I know, but everyone's different, so it might not work for everyone.
  11. I live in Serbia, south-eastern part of Europe... No means of transport or enough money to finance larger trips... So, like I said, it's not very likely to happen
  12. I LOVE the idea. I live on the other side of the world, so it's not very likely I'd be there (sadly) but idea is just awsome Also, what about those informations you asked for (username, continent, country etc)
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