bbwolf

nothing

when the county took over the facility it went to crap

went to see therapist today, appointment was confirmed yesterday, after waiting a hour and a half, the receptionist calls my name then informs me my therapist is out today, i just came off of several days of depression and now having recurring anxiety, and finding out i had just wasted nearly 2 hrs pisses me off

suicide is painless

minutes before i got the call that my dad had died, i felt someone sit down on my bed, when i looked up i seen nothing, that was in 2012, to this day out of no where i can smell him, a combination of old spice, and those stinking roll your own cigarettes, sometimes in the house but mostly when im driving somewhere,

understatement

sick and tired of feeling lonely

the way i describe how i feel is a wild animal, a predator like a bear or lion, trapped and caged no longer free to roam,

sounds like my life

lonely, unwanted, depressed, need to be touched, in need of companionship,

not having a future life, and for wasting what life i did have on someone who didnt deserve it,

black

i know how that pilot felt, i feel like the last 30 years of my life was wasted, and now im just wasting air and taking up space

keto//os orange dream, next gonna be coffee with creamer, then fast until dinner time about 7pm

could also be hormonal? i think i would see a endocrinologist to make sure everything is at its needed levels