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dysect

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    dysect got a reaction from Tymothi in For the first time in life I feel...alone   
    I've always been alone but never felt it. I developed sever social anxiety around middle school when all the kids would make fun of how I looked and followed me through high school. I never got over it so I became a recluse. I preferred staying in my room all day on the computer doing nothing. I only go out if I have to(work). The thing is, I've always enjoyed being alone. If I ever got invited to go somewhere, I usually rejected the invitation. On the rare occasions I did go, I would never enjoy my time. Lately though, I'm beginning to feel alone. It's causing severe depression. I don't sleep well. At nights I have all these negative thoughts about how alone I am and how I've wasted away my youth doing nothing because of how much I've feared the outside world. I no longer like being alone and naturally seek companionship. The problem is due to my isolation, I feel like I've hit a brick wall. I don't know where to go to meet people. I don't have any friends. I tried online dating for a while but it never worked out for me. Those dating apps are only for goodlooking people anyway. So yeah, I've relied on the internet for pretty much everything. To help me get through my lack of a social life but it's no longer doing it for me. I desperately need to change as I feel like I'm running out of time but like I said before...I just don't know where to go.
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