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About LightMeadow

  • Birthday 10/20/1994

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  1. A little over a year ago I was officially diagnosed with anxiety and depression. I'm currently on medication and it's working wonderfully. Without much thought, I just assumed I would be on anti-depressants for the rest of my life. However both my doctor and my mother (who also suffers from depression) have mentioned that therapy is essential and, according to my doctor, with therapy I could stop taking anti-depressants. I've tried therapy before but I was not ready for it therefore it really didn't work. I'm open to the possibility of it however, do I really HAVE to have therapy? I understand that most if not all of you are not professionals, I'm simply trying to get other people's experiences and knowledge on this topic.
  2. I'm in a certain predicament. I went through a break up about five months ago. It was really hard for me. I do not want to dive into another relationship because I believe that is unhealthy and I should really let myself heal and take time for myself. Still, I'm craving sexual intimacy, especially that of the female kind being that I also recently came to terms with my bisexuality. So my question is this: Is it unhealthy to have sexual relationships after a break up, just as it is to have serious relationships? I want to make sure I'm taking the right path for myself and in treating my depression correctly.
  3. Hello- I haven't posted in awhile, mostly because I started to do really well. Recently, however, I'm noticing the little warning signs that I'm slipping up again. For those of you who don't know I have depression, anxiety and PTSD. In August of this year I went through a very tough break up that pushed me almost over the edge, if you get what I mean. One of the main reasons he broke it off with me was because I was very depressed near the end of our relationship. I realize now this is partly due to his sly emotional abuse. After that horrid mess, I really focused on getting better by understanding my depression and how to treat it. Lately, I'm noticing the common signs of my depression cloud bubbling up again: lack of motivation, laziness, not wanting to go out, not taking care of myself or my immediate needs, overthinking, ect. I often fall into depression when I'm on school breaks, whether it be summer, winter or spring break. School gives me a regimented schedule, socialization, purpose and something to do. I'm doing my best to combat this, but it's funny how this disease has all the right tools to making fighting back next to impossible. I wonder if I'll be able to hold of major depressiveness for the rest of my life, if I can keep fighting it back so I can be relatively happy, or is that totally unrealistic? I'm also worried that with winter coming, my status will only get worse, but I'll do my best.
  4. I'm so glad to see people respond to this! If you like cute animals, I have a ton on my blog. It makes me happy looking through it.
  5. In an effort to treat my depression, I've been doing whatever makes me happy. I've found little cures that can lift me out of a sour mood or at least alleviate some of the darkness. Here's some of what makes me happy: -Writing -Friends & Family -Candles -Showers -TV Shows -Walks -Books -Animals -A clean environment -Making lists -Wearing cute outfits -Listening and singing along to music. What makes you happy?
  6. Yeah I confronted him directly shortly after this post. I knew already that he was blowing me off but I needed the answer so I could find closure and move on. The way he handled the situation makes me thankful he broke up with me. When I knocked on his door he did his best to pretend he wasn't home. I had to knock twice before he opened his door. He had all his lights off and everything. He of course said no to the second chance and I'm frankly thankful. I don't want a person who handles situations like these so immaturely and without much empathy. Thanks for the advice! I promise I am being very good to myself and giving myself love.
  7. I need some sound advice. So my boyfriend of almost a year broke up with me about a month ago out of the blue. After some talks to clarify things, he said he would think about giving us a second shot. Woo, right? Well that was like two weeks ago and I haven't heard bubcus from him. I even texted him, knowing communication was a hard thing for us, saying "hey no pressure just wanted you to know that I would like to hear your decision in person." He did not even respond to that text. So I'm caught between this: Should I just assume the answer is no and go from there or Should I ask to know the answer to a thought process that I'm heavily in? I have tried to tell myself okay, the answer is no, move on, but it's nagging at me and it's really hard for me to starting moving on with this gnawing at the back of my head all day. Any advice, personal experience, help?
  8. Hello, I'm 20, a junior in college and I've been suffering from depression since I was 14 (but only last year got diagnosed and prescribed meds.) The fact that she's reached out to you is great. She feels like she can talk to you and wants to get better. She's doing her best to combat this illness. Since you don't suffer from depression and maybe gaining some insight might help your situation, maybe you could pick up some books on depression! Like a biography of a long-time sufferer or something that would give you a good insight on dealing with the illness. I know it's super scary to let your child go off to a college, especially when it's 10 hours away and under the current circumstances. For me college was a great thing. I had issues, certainly, but I found a lot of happiness and the fresh start really helped me blossom into the person I am today. College is the best thing that's ever happened to me. It gave me a great opportunity to get to know myself and find my passions in life, which really help with depression! If I were in her shoes, I would be a bit nervous but excited to go to college. Having her brother near is a great thing and the close relationship you have with her is wonderful. I would make sure she knows that she can call you anytime, any day and you'll pick up and just listen and be empathetic. Also, make sure she knows that it's okay to reach out for help (which is sounds like she already understands), that everyone needs help, and that the people around her who love her are more than happy to be there for her. Knowing that she wants to get better, I'm sure she'll make an effort to continue her meds and talk to a counselor. Depression is a life-long battle and it get's easier, but you are never cured. A strong support system and the proper tools to cope are the best medicine out there. The fact that you're posting on here is a bright ray of hope for her. You truly care and want the best for her (I mean of course she's your daughter.) I'd say keep doing what you're doing!
  9. SenorDomino - Haha, that would be a weird turn of events, seeing how visibly disgusted she is when she sees two women being intimate. But I half-thought about that myself. Orso- Thank you I try. My mother's been through a lot and I can't expect her to be perfect. She's just as human as me. Sabishikunaru- That's actually a wonderful idea! I myself haven't read those books and would love to. I'll see about getting them when I have a bit more cash on hand.
  10. Thanks Tungsten. I know what I am and I don't need the positive words of others to confirm that. I'm content and at peace finally figuring out my orientation and embracing it. My mother is at that age where changing her opinions start to get difficult. I'm okay with that. She doesn't hate me and she could've reacted a lot worse. I'm pretty lucky compared to some of the coming-out stories I've heard. I was hoping there was some magical saying that would open up her eyes. For example, when people were arguing that being gay was a choice, those saying it wasn't asked "So when did you decide to be straight?" and then they finally got it. Maybe I'll just think of something clever.
  11. So I recently went through a hard break up with my boyfriend of almost a year. During our relationship I finally admitted to myself that I'm bisexual. I came out to him almost immediately because we were best friends as well. He accepted me right away. However he was the only one who knew. After the break up I confided in my mother that I was bisexual. My mother is liberal and pretty open minded but, she's going into her 60's and she's always expressed discomfort when she see's two women getting intimate (like on a show or something). So I said it and she said "Come back to me in twenty years" with a laugh. She pretty much said that being bisexual is a common thing a lot of young people go through and that I'll eventually end up either straight or a lesbian. Angered at her less than understanding response, I left the conversation at that. I'm not too bothered by her words. I understand with the way she was raised, the time frame and her background, she's not going to be as open-minded as some of my peers. Still, I was disappointing that my mother pretty much told me that my orientation was a phase (when I'm 20 years old.) I know it's a common thing for bisexuals to encounter. If they're with a person of the opposite gender, people will assume they're straight both inside and out of the LGBTA+ community. I'm sure if I was just a lesbian my mother wouldn't have said what she said. Has anyone else encountered this? Should I even bother trying to make my mother understand?
  12. Scienceguy, I'm sorry you're feeling this way. Caring for people comes after getting to know them and building a relationship. People do care about your existence, it's just hard to see that sometimes. We all can get wrapped up in our own little worlds from time to time. I don't know if what you say about your old self being dead, but I've heard the human body replaces all of it's cells over a 7 year period. So every 7 years you're like a new person. You could see that as a positive thing! As you learn and grow, your being is slowly changing as well and you're constantly evolving into a better you. Maybe seek out people with similar interests. Talk about the things you like and are passionate about with others. If you can find someone with the same likes, you could make a friend!
  13. Hi NoHappyEnding, Welcome and I'm sorry about your situation. I can understand the bad thoughts and horrid moods. Like others have said, reach out to whomever you can. If you're not sure your parents would be a help, try your friend you mentioned. If that doesn't seem like a good idea, talk to someone at your school like a counselor or a nurse. They can help you and direct you to professional help and even help your parents understand that you need it. With medication and therapy those bad days will hopefully fade away. General things that you can do to help in the meantime: Make sure you're taking care of yourself, eating enough and staying hydrated. If you start to overthink, find what helps you calm down. For me I like to write out my feelings, usually just in a word document. You can experiment. Sometimes people need showers, meditation, yoga, a hot cup of tea, a good book, a movie from your childhood, anything that will make you feel better. One thing that will not make you feel better is alcohol. Is called a depressant for a reason. I'm in college, so I'm not saying boo to alcohol, but when you're in a dark place, it's just like putting salt in a wound. Another thing to keep in mind, you don't have to be ashamed of having issues. Everyone has them in one form or another. Depression is a very common issue people have. 350 million people globally suffer from it, so you're far from alone. It's a good sign that you took the step too reach out to us here on the forums. Keep it up! We can help.
  14. Being an ass is never the way to go. If you did that and a girl did start to like you (impossible btw) first of all that's just being mean to a human being, and you're not acting like yourself so they wouldn't even like the real you. Cheesy and often repeated but you can't love someone else properly without loving yourself. Seems like you don't have good friends if they're calling you names. It's never too late for love. Do your best to find your own happiness by yourself. I would also try talking to a therapist about how you feel. If you really feel like you won't be complete without someone in your life then go to places where you could meet girls. Do online dating, go to bars, talk to girls who you like and take chances. Just don't be an ass to girls. We have enough a******s in the world to deal with.
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