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Everything posted by Yosemite

  1. Sydney has been so cold & rainy all week.Strange given this time of year.
  2. I have just been prescribed Abilify for my depression and was wondering if any-one just takes this stand alone for their depression ? I have read a lot about it being augmented with an anti-depressant for best results, but I can not tolerate most anti-d's, so my doc has just suggested trialing Abilify on its own. Has anyone had any luck just on Abilfy for their Depression symptoms ? Thankyou for any advice. rgds "worried " Yose
  3. When you described your situation, I thought you were talking about me , as this mirrors my current cirmcumstance so much ! I left my job in October of last year as I also couldn't stand my boss and could not handle working for her as she was exarcebating my depression to the point of me taking lots of days off and staying at home to avoid her (most unlike me). So at that time I was sooooooo relieved to be free from there! So, fast forward to now and I still haven't managed to get a job , despite going to many interviews, and applying for different positions. Some of them don't even even let me know how I went, or why I didn't even get the job....just leave me hanging. Also, my depression isn't helping matters either as I get quite down when I get rejected and end up spending my days in bed or surfing the net. What perks me up though is that I also look at it from a positive view point...ie, now I am really FREE. Free to enjoy time that I never had whilst I was working. So , have made plans for a holiday next month. It's not always like you will have this free time when you are working or when you land your next job, so why fight it, and just enjoy it . Also sometimes I just think sod the corporate life....it's just full of egos and brown-nosers and horrendous people like my last boss! Easier said than done though, especially from a financial stand point. Also , this spare time gives me a chance to really tackle my depression and ensure I will be better equiped with better coping skills in case I come across another manager like my last boss. But, I'm sure you will find something again soon....try not get to down about it and just enjoy your freedom !!!!!!! Take care Yose
  4. Felt good upon waking, but slid downhill fast in the afternoon.......Now feeling so blah & dont want to face the world. Why the slide? Beats me, no trigger I can think of. Well, thats depression for you.
  5. Well, end of the road for you and Cymbalta Maedhros. Have certainly enjoyed following your progress as it assisted me greatly into thinking I wasn't the only one struggling with it ! Hope Zoloft brings you some welcome relief. It was my first anti-d I tried and was on it for 6 mths, but only responded partially to it.( By partially I mean I was so up and down on it !) I am still really struggling to find something that works consistently and really beginning to wonder if I am treatment resistant as I have tried so many things. I am med free at the moment and just trying to pull myself through the blah days with lots of rest and a balanced diet. It is very hard sometimes though. Can relate also to your grievance about doctors- I also get the feeling my doc is over my Biotching, and would rather see other patients than put up with me. And this is the same doc I have seen for 20+ years! The best of luck for your new job. I am sure you will do very well and hope the Zoloft settles down by the time you start . Take care Yose
  6. My mind feels generally "unclear" during a depressive episode....Like their is pressure inside, brain chemicals feel all out of whack, a headache that no headache tablet will ease, brain fog all over and I can't talk. The only thing that seems to help me through these d-periods is sleep. After a good sleep, my head somewhat returns back to a normal feeling. Only to have these feeling return again and again and again.......Depression is a never ending cycle for me & no med has helped. I'm so over it.....
  7. I am in the same boat as you, 6 meds down to no effect , and wondering if anything at all will help me out! I am really convinced my symptoms of depression are med-resistant. Each med I have been on either made my depression so much worse(Effexor,Cymbalta), or did not work one little bit (Zoloft,Edronax, Prozac). Each of these targeted serotonin and norepherine, and I am now of the conclusion that my problems (brain fog,tiredness,headaches,mental cloudiness) are not at all related to these neurotransmitters. So, what next ? Well, after no success with the above, I am sure my Pdoc will run with another class ( ie MAOI ), but given the intense pain and uncomfortablness I have felt on the previous 6, I am actually pretty loathe to try another. Rather put up with my still depressed non-med state of mind, than endure side-effects & worsening depression on meds (if that makes any sense?). Good luck with whatever course you decide to take .
  8. When I am in the midst of one of my d-episodes, I'm in this half-awake, half dream like state that renders me function-less. My thoughts are all murky & foggy and simple conversational skills goes out the window. I often wonder if it is depression or a tumor . Leaving my home is not an option... I just feel like staring..... On these days, I feel like putting up an "Out of Order" sign on me. Gosh, I must be just totally weird !
  9. I am interested in trying Emsam as I have had zero luck with the previous 7 I have tried. But, my doc is more likely to push a TCA on me first as we have not gone down this path yet. Is Emsam usually a last resort after all have failed- could I trial this before going down the TCA route ? Feel as though I am at the end of my drug rope and am desperate to find something that brings me some relief.
  10. I have bought Sam-E ( as well as other vitamins) via Iherb.com. They are often very reasonably priced with monthly specials all the time. Very fast to post out as well.
  11. When I am in the midst of one of my d-episodes, I feel pain. I can't describe the feeling, but it's like my head has this pressure/blockage exerted against it. The pain also extends to my back & legs and I'm in this half-awake, half dream like state that renders me function-less. My thoughts are all murky & foggy and simple conversational skills goes out the window. Are these "head pains" a common symptom of D ? It feels like the chemicals in my brain are totally out of whack and I hate this feeling.
  12. Sorry to hear you are doing it tough with Cymbalta at the moment. My experience with Cymbalta is similar to yours....On 60mgs for 4 weeks and it was doing the exact opposite of what it was supposed to do ie, it made me more depressed, with greater suicidal thoughts . So, I just quit it cold turkey....Not saying you should do the same and of course speak with your doctor first as everyone is different. We should always listen to your bodies as we are the best judges- if Cymbalta is making you feel worse, then get off it ASAP ( with doctors guidance of course). I realise it is a horrible and uncomfortable time you are going through at the moment , but stay strong and realise there are other meds out there that can help you.
  13. So far in my 3 years of trailing differnt antidepressant medications: Zoloft, Prozac, Effexor,Remeron, Edronax and Cymbalta. Have also tried Sam-E, St Johns Wort, Gingko & 5HTP None of them have worked for me. Am still seeking something to bring me some relief, but feel am loosing my mind at the same time. Am SO over this.
  14. Under my doctors orders, I titrated up to 225mgs in the space of 6 weeks .....and never felt worse in my entire life. I couldn't leave my room, felt horrendous and was fighting suicidal thoughts every hour. Obviously not the med for me.
  15. So sorry you are struggling with the Celexa at the moment. They say people often feel worse before they fell better when starting meds. Have no idea why this is so. Perhaps the med is working & 'Re-wiring" your serotonin pathways, hence the reason you feel blah. And it takes time to do this rewiring ? Still, I don't know why this is so. My own experience with meds leaves me pretty much disfunctional for the first few weeks, hence the reason why I dread starting a new med. Hang in there & hopefully things will take a turn for the better in a week or so
  16. You are definitely not a loser, but a highly articulate and intelligent person. It's just the depression talking and clouding your judgement. It makes us think in extremes at times , like when you board the bus and worry about what people think, but I can tell you this- the way people treat you is largely dependent on the vibe you give them. If you are anxious/paranoid, it shows, and people like to play games because they don't have anything better to do. Self-confidence is the only thing that matters. Keep doing whatever it is you do and if anyone has a problem with it, sod them, not worth the time of day. I've been there. What I learned to do, was play it off like it was funny and not take myself so seriously. 95% of the time its all in your head, and only you can change that. Take care & good luck I'm sure you'll work through this .
  17. Cymbalta worked brilliantly for me for the first week, then did exactly the opposite of what it was designed to do. It made my depression much worse and I had increased thoughts of suicide. It was definitely not the right med for me. I am really struggling to find something that works and something that does not tip the balance the "other" way.
  18. Hi Virgo, I agree , best check with your doc re: cold turkey . You might experience withdrawal symptoms if stopping to suddenly. But, having said that. I stopped Cymbalta cold turkey at the 4 week mark, because it was making my depression worse. Not one problem & no withdrwal drama ! And I felt much better the next day without it. It was like my brain was relieved & thanked me for not bombarding it with any more Cymbalta ! Like you I didn't have one side effect whilst taking it either. Strange how our brains react/non-react to things at times? :stars:
  19. Hi Maedhros, Great to hear you are feeling better today. It's always a feeling of like, "my god, is the med really working....is this what normal feels like.....Hooray !" Just be wary of serotonin syndrome with the combination of Cymbalta & 5HTP, a possible harmful interaction of the 2 since they both target serotonin.. But of course, run it by your doc if in doubt. Take care Yose
  20. Yes, very much progressively worse.... At first, like the first week on Cymbalta I felt quite good & up- woke up feeling refreshed with energy, mind clear, a warm sense of well being. But, looking back now, this was probaly all a Placebo effect. I hope Nicko, you have better luck than I did . How are you feeling now? yose
  21. Have been following your progress with Cymbalta and do really feel sorry for you, as you have been having such a rough time with it. I have just quit it after a month because it was making me feel worse ( bravo to you for lasting so long on it !) Hopefully you get some relief soon !
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