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stevewilliam

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  1. hi everyone thanks for the comments so far, just to answer a few things people have commented on, i dont drink any alcohol and havent for over a year, i find even one alcohol makes me feel worse, and i use to love a drink when i was younger. i avoid drinking at all costs, and as i dont have a social life / g out anymore its not hard anyway to be honest. just checked its citalopram 30mg, i did go back to my gp and she increased from 20-30mg ive been on them for 6 months also the doc said its normal but i often gets dark thoughts of death all the time, m***** / blood / terrible things also yes the weather doesnt help, i love the sunshine and again if i can be bothered i go on a sunbed once a week because i read into vit d and how important it is etc, i do take some walks etc, but going anywhere is a big build up like im running a marathon, even making a phone call i should make say monday it doesnt get done till the following week etc
  2. p.s im 30 years old, even having a bath or shower can take days for me to actually have one, and its so embarassing but ive started wetting the bed, 3-4 nights a week? i embarrased ashmed and an absolute joke
  3. hi to everyone on the forum i don't normally join things like this but i feel its time to get someo utside help from others with depression etc heres my story : i was diagnosed with severe depression about 6 months ago altho i know ive had it for a lot longer (years not months) i didnt want to go to the doctor, but it got to the point where i couldnt do much and felt like my head was going to explode etc anyway i was put on cilopatram which has been increased to 30mg.i changed my diet to healthy fruit etc, ive even taken a herb called kratom which is ok but not great, tried st johns wort, lots of water, even had a bit of a problem with coedine as ive tried everything to get out of this. i feel like im all out of options, ive got a good home life, not a very stressful job, a beautiful little boy, i just hate feeling like this and dont feel any point to my life and get hardly no joy out of anything anymore, im tired all the time, its an effort to do anything, even take my son out over the park its a huge deal. it doesnt just effect me it effects everyone around me too, i have an odd day where i feel better but its like when i do i pay for it with about 3-4 miserable bad days. i dont want to feel like ive won the lottery everyday i just want to be normal. does this ever go once and for all? i dont know what to do, i feel like i have no life, and im about 90 just waiting until im not here anymore so can be happy again even if someone said to me heres a £3000 holiday for free, id make an excuse to get out of it etc. any suggestions on what i can do, heres what ive tried so far and am out of ideas : ANTI DEPRESSANTS : KRATOM : COEDINE (I KNOW ITS NOT THE ANSWER) : HEALTHY DIET : WATER : VITAMINS : HAPPY / RELAXING MUSIC : HAPPY FILMS : TALKING TO PEOPLE ABOUT IT : IVE GOT A GOOD SUPPORT NETWORK : EXERCISING : SOCIALISING (VERY RARE AS CANT BE BOTHERED) : GO FOR WALKS ive literally tried it all, any help advise from anyone would be great thanks for your time
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