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CGAG1993

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About CGAG1993

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    Junior Member
  • Birthday 09/09/1993

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    Male

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  1. I'm glad you're doing ok, Audrey. Just continue to get better.
  2. I'm sorry you had to experience something true that happened involving your CO. That's my worst nightmare, I hope that never happens, to me or anyone else. I'm just imagining the pain of the worst news I could get about my CO being true, and I can't even handle it hypothetically. I'm sorry for whatever happened and we're here if you need us.
  3. Hey @Audrey822, I haven't checked on here in a couple of days. I hope you're Ok. You know we're here if you need us. Idk what happened, but I think I know how you feel, I've gotten news about my CO that has just totally devastated me, thankfully they were just rumors and weren't true. Hopefully, if it's possible, the thing about your CO isn't true.
  4. @decado I'm so sorry that people have told you you're not good enough to be a fan. I have had major, major issues with that only, not with other people, with myself (although other people didn't help, they unintentionally made me feel worse cuz they didn't know how I'd react) I HATED myself for not being a fan of hers since the beginning, since the show she got her big break on first aired, and I'm still not happy about it, I try to not think about that. I would wallow around self loathing, just thinking about it and how I can't do anything to change it, ok I'd better stop talking about this now before I get back that way.
  5. @NCC Thank you so much, NCC, I really appreciate the advice from someone older than me, you are the same age as my father. It's good to hear advice from a complete stranger that could be a parent. This CO is a little inconvenient, making me focus on her instead of getting a real girlfriend, but the thing about that is, I'm extremely shy and I wouldn't have had a girlfriend even if I didn't get this CO. My CO has given me more troubles than happiness, although I am grateful for the happiness she has given me. She has brought positivity to my life, she has made me more open to things and has taught me some, the negativity she has brought though doesn't have anything to do with me being unhappy with her, it's just the lack of being able to tell her how I feel and my response to some of the things she says and talks about on Twitter, and just not being able to talk to her to give her advice and be there for her, that's what I want most, is to be there for her. I hope things go well for you too, it seems like your CO isn't giving you much trouble, that's good.
  6. @NCC I know what you mean about not letting your CO go, it would feel like betraying her to me. You said you've been by yourself about 20 years, well so have I, I'm 22 and never had a girlfriend, and I think since it's been this long without having anyone, I'm starting to feel it, that need for love, at least affection, sometimes I even think I can physically feel the need to hug someone, but I want that someone to be a girlfriend. You're right, anything can change in a second, I'm scared about that too, that's why sometimes I don't want to hear any news about her, I'm scared I will hear something devastating. I mean, obviously the worst, marriage right, she's a young, very beautiful 22 about to be 23 year old woman, she's right at the age a lot of women get married and I'm scared to death of that happening. The only thing that keeps me going when those thoughts come into my head is she's very dedicated to her work and her fans and she's too focused on that right now for anything else. I think that's how it happens sometimes, I wasn't looking for anything when I found my CO either she just, fell into my lap, which I wish would happen literally, that would be awesome.
  7. I understand, I need to talk about my CO sometimes too, when I first discovered her, that's all I wanted to do. I needed to gush over her and tell everyone how great she is.
  8. I've realized that there are only 2 ways for this depression to go away. One: my fantasy comes true, somehow I meet her, we start to hang out, become good friends and fall in love (well, she does with me cuz I already love her lol), and get married. Heck, even meeting her and hanging out with her would fix it. But we know how likely that is. Two: I stop caring about her so that any news or anything that happens related to her doesn't matter to me. (But I don't have control over that, I can't just all of the sudden decide to stop caring about her) (but even if I do start to think about her less and am drifting away from her mentally, I get so scared and force myself back to thinking about her more because I don't want that to happen, I love caring about her and loving her, I would hate myself for letting her go.)
  9. @NCC Hello, it's good to have you here. I am 22 and also a male. Welcome, here you can tell us about your problems and we'll listen. I've been here a year and about 8 months. I completely understand everything that happened with you. That's pretty much what happened to me, I had been aware of my CO for a couple of years before I became obsessed with her, but then something just happened, idk what or how but, I had always thought she was hot, but I happened to catch her accepting an award one Sunday night, and after that I became more interested in her and started looking up videos of her in interviews and videos she made herself and by then I was hooked. I understand how you feel, to care so much about someone and they don't even know you exist, to want someone so bad and know that you will never be able to be with them. For some reason, even knowing all this I still tweet her and direct message her, why? idk, I know nothing will ever happen but I still have hope regardless. One good thing I try to get out of all this is, for us to care about these people that we know we won't be getting anything back from, at least it shows what kind of person we are, that we want the best for complete strangers. I understand about everything really, the jealousy, hatred for the man she's with, I've been trying deal with that for a while now, and I was dealing with her boyfriend she was with when I became obsessed with her and was trying to get to know him and not hate him, I was getting close, I understood that he made her happy and I was trying to use that as a reason to not hate him. But then, they broke up, mutually (I have to imagine there was at least some sadness and hurt, as long as he didn't hurt her). Now she's with some other guy, I haven't really been dealing with him so far. But try to at least be happy for her, if this guy makes her happy, then that's good. Oh and you said your girl is cute and upbeat, you could've been describing mine because that's exactly how I would describe her personality and looks, she is the cutest thing I have ever seen and she is so positive and loving. We're here if you need us
  10. @NCC Hello, it's good to have you here. I am 22 and also a male. Welcome, here you can tell us about your problems and we'll listen. I've been here a year and about 8 months. I completely understand everything that happened with you. That's pretty much what happened to me, I had been aware of my CO for a couple of years before I became obsessed with her, but then something just happened, idk what or how but, I had always thought she was hot, but I happened to catch her accepting an award one Sunday night, and after that I became more interested in her and started looking up videos of her in interviews and videos she made herself and by then I was hooked. I understand how you feel, to care so much about someone and they don't even know you exist, to want someone so bad and know that you will never be able to be with them. For some reason, even knowing all this I still tweet her and direct message her, why? idk, I know nothing will ever happen but I still have hope regardless. One good thing I try to get out of all this is, for us to care about these people that we know we won't be getting anything back from, at least it shows what kind of person we are, that we want the best for complete strangers. I understand about everything really, the jealousy, hatred for the man she's with, I've been trying deal with that for a while now, and I was dealing with her boyfriend she was with when I became obsessed with her and was trying to get to know him and not hate him, I was getting close, I understood that he made her happy and I was trying to use that as a reason to not hate him. But then, they broke up, mutually (I have to imagine there was at least some sadness and hurt, as long as he didn't hurt her). Now she's with some other guy, I haven't really been dealing with him so far. But try to at least be happy for her, if this guy makes her happy, then that's good. Oh and you said your girl is cute and upbeat, you could've been describing mine because that's exactly how I would describe her personality and looks, she is the cutest thing I have ever seen and she is so positive and loving. We're here if you need us
  11. @Ethosa Hello, it's nice to see there are new people here. I was reading some of the recent pages and saw your post. This seems sort of relatable to me, my CO is also a singer and she does some good too, and she has a TON of haters, for no reason, she does anything and they're right there ready to criticize her, I hate haters, but she handles them well, she doesn't let them get to her. I understand about her not knowing you exist because there is no way my CO knows I exist, I tweet her and am lucky enough to be able to DM her, but there's very little chance that she'll ever notice me. Anyway, getting back to your post, it seems you're at the stage I could potentially be at, now I'm not sure if I wanna get there, but good for you if you were able to fix it. I don't have the best friend situation either, I only have one real good friend but even with him I don't talk about things real personal with him, but I did start a job almost a year ago and I noticed I started to think a little bit less about her, but I think I forced myself to stay obsessed with her because I loved her so much and I didn't want to lose her, then over the winter we weren't working and it came back, so I think it does have to do with socialization. I would like to have some good friends like you said.
  12. @Audrey822 Well, right at the moment I'm ok, just at times I get to feeling bad, and when I have I remembered how much it helped to come here and talk. So for the most part I just wanted to be able to get back here so I could talk if I needed to.
  13. Hello everyone. I've been wanting to come back for the past couple of months, but something was wrong with the site, but thanks to Audrey I'm back. I think I left off when I had my crush with my highschool crush that had been in an accident. She's doing very well now, back to driving, and I even see her drive once in awhile because her boyfriend happens to live right across the street from me, isn't that lovely? But I am back to the reason I came to this site in the first place, my CO is back, and it had been pretty intense for a while about a month ago but now it has cooled down a little since I started working again, but she is still here.
  14. @nothingatall, thank you, I want her in my life bo matter what, I care about her way too much to just let her go. So that's why I'm trying so hard to talk to her, I wanna stay in her life, it was too hard for me to do that after high school and we lost touch and weren't in each others lives, but then this crash happened, it was almost like a blessing in disguise, for me at least, I just need to do something with it and not let yet another opportunity pass by me.
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