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Everything posted by Evergreenforst4

  1. Hi fitness, I would go for it and monitor your condition carefully because it looks like it can bring stability to volatile ups and downs
  2. Single momma broke my heart so I am now dating a wonderful accountant lol she agreed to be my girlfriend after only 2 dates, bowling/arcade 1st date and then we had dinner and watched Shang-Chi 2nd one. Lol don't know how long this one will last but I might as well enjoy the rollercoaster
  3. I think it depends on what dating app you use. Some dating apps are just bad but some are actually decent, just try a lot of different ones if you are serious and find what works for you.
  4. I have been super happy because I met this single mom lol I also have a 2nd date with an accountant this weekend she is pretty cool.
  5. Hi, You are an empath or empathetic person so I think you absorb the emotions of other people? But I think it can work the opposite way too, you can absorb the happiness of other people so maybe try to avoid people who bring you down if you can and find people who make you feel good and stick with them.
  6. Hi Honoratha, I was like you in that I did not think we should for therapy. Most colleges have free therapy or at least part of the tuition. Also some workplaces have free therapy as well. I am of the camp that I am okay with paying for it but the person needs to be attentive, caring and genuine. In my honest opinion I think the best thing you could do right now is work with your University. If I was you I would talk to professors and let them know you are struggling with the material, go to on campus counselors and try to reconcile with your mentorship and friends and try to be a good roomate and get to a better place so you can finish your degree because it opens up a lot of doors
  7. Hi, Part of it might be your upbringing if you grew up religous. Sometimes heavy religion can be overzealous, oppressive and xenophobic especially to people who don't fit in and make them ostracized. I understand this because I grew up really religous. I had experienced assault and abuse in my life and I have always just used women as a vice bouncing from women to women for different things. I hope one day I will find the right one.
  8. I think there can also be a stigma to taking a lot of medications. A lot of it is also in the psych what we cannot see, like placebo effects. I am not sure if ignorance is bliss but maybe don't think about how many you have to take because I think that would drive anyone crazy. I am sorry I cannot really relate I never took medications and I barely use pain killers unless I feel like I am dying because I am so paranoid about pharmacueticals but modern medicine has done a lot of people good sometimes I still get paranoid and irrational
  9. The problem with better help is they don't vet the people enough, it is kind of pricey but if you are uninsured, get a discount code and find a good one it could work. Pewdiepie did a documentary on betterhelp and the problems it has. Overall I would try teledoc first. Also once COVID ends I think in person counseling can be good too. Sometimes it just helps to get out and go somewhere especially with depression. Good luck!
  10. Hi, It seems to me like you do like life and wish you could be accepted but you feel you are outcast so you will be unloved and it is too sad for you to go through life when you have desires in your heart and soul but fear they may never come to fruitation. But there have been outcasts just like you, in fact many of the people who were rejects and outcasts had the biggest effects on the world. If you are a spiritual person you can try to God ask to give a blessing because you feel excluded. Also you can try to find any skills, even if you think you lack physical capabilities you could try to get good at just one thing. Even having one skill can make people feel good no matter how simple it is. With that I also think having gratitude is important. Your heart is like the earth, if your heart is hard nothing will grow no matter how much water or resource there is. Also you yourself might have more physical capability than some people, you are intelligent and form articulate thoughts. I am sure you can use your ingenuity to overcome your limitations
  11. Hi Kyle, There was a boy named Elliot Rogers who saw couples and he was unhappy and jealous. Sadly he ended up being a serial killer and died, that is the power and bitterness of jealousy it destroys people from within. I believe it is possible for you to be confident again as you have said you felt on top of the world before so it is not out of your reach. It is good your depression is lower now you just work on self esteem. If you feel self conscious try working out from home. I workout with structured youtube videos and I also do jujitsu. I think finding structure will helo you exercise more consistently, find a program you like and stick with it. Dating can be hard but you should put yourself out there. I have been dating in the last month and have been on several dates and I think I finally found someone who will want to be my girlfriend now. The hard part about dating is some people are not serious because either they scam people or they are serial cheaters looking for swipes for confidence boosts or they are chronically single people with crazy high standards so do not take it personally if you meet bad people and just be smart about how you do it. ps. That guy wrote a book about his life as well it is called My Twisted World
  12. Greetings Chumly, You can try betterhelp, use a youtuber code for a discount but it is kind of expensive. It if you have insurance try to use teledoc that is better. Those are two basic ones I know of
  13. That is a purrfect avatar. The forums would simply be a CATastrophe without such a great avatar.
  14. One quote from you is very interesting "All the women that are interested in me, I'm not into and the few ones I'm into, aren't into me." It sounds like you do have options so if you are really desperste you could always date down if you just really wanted a relationship. There is a saying that goes "One in the hand is worth two in the bush" Maybe if a women seems interested in you and is nice try giving them a chance. In a way it is kind of like treating people the way you want to be treated, you feel the women you like should give you a chance, it is a difficult situation because dating can just turn into a big meat market and women are always naturally more selective than men are because they are the ones who get pregnant so biologically they have more to lose and more reason to protect themselves. As a result this tends to hurt males mental health because males have less friends in general and also guys tend to put in a whole lot of effort so it is discouraging when even though you put in all this great effort and check the boxes you still do not get what you desire so it is frustrating.
  15. Hi, Yeah I think people do not understand men's mental health. Honestly just find a way to express your feelings either with sports or art you have to have an outlet because it makes people suffer like crazy if they don't
  16. Hi, Lol welcome to the club. I have had struggles like this a lot. I met this girl who played dungeon and dragons we went on a few dates and I thought on the 3rd date we were going to be official but nope lol, totally got friendzoned -_- at least I am not giving her back the Sun Tzu Art of War book lol. I appreciate that book more anyways! Lol dating women is like trying to get into the NBA or something, they just set like a gajilion things you have to do. Over 6 feet, 6 digit income, six pack, funny on the spot no matter what and idk lol I try hard and I check some of the boxes but honestly if I was a guy that checked ALL the boxes I probably would not be interested in that girl myself. So I would say give them a taste of their own medicine, next time someone gives you a bad time just swipe left on them yourself. It's very therapeutic. I now swipe left on all the fake profiles I see.
  17. Hi, I would just focus on the positives. You have a partner and a safe home, some people do not have either of those things. I have found that the power of positive thinking is essential for mental health this is because once you set a trajectory that is where the mental health tends to go. Sometimes society tries to set a negative trajectory on us so it is important to use mindfulness and counteract this.
  18. You know people like you are the salt of the earth. It's people like you that are the reason lives can be built and Nations made strong and you selflessly helped other and build them up but they don't appreciate you. You don't deserve that garbage treatment. Basically your fiance with an animal brain wanted "high quality" men to mate with and just used you as a cuckhold but the truth is you are the real quality person and shes just running around with worthless deadbeats Please just find someone who believes in you and actually loves you no matter what, you deserve so much more than this crap
  19. Thanos, Epicetus has good advice. My advice is to find a new girl asap just put yourself out there. Some women are jerks because lets face it, a 40 year old women working at a grocery store could easily get a guy. Women are cruel and selective, you just have to accept it but the challenge is you feel like you need that comfort and love as a base to improve yourself and grow but women don't care. They want a 100% self made man all ready no strings attached and they will weigh you, judge you, look at you like a gift horse, maybe friendzone you for a while to try to see if they can do any better. I understand the cruelty in the world. I left my girlfriend because she did not give me the emotional support I needed. I felt like I cut a huge lifeline and took a huge risk but I know that I deserve better and I would rather try and fail than not try at all. In a way I have learned to accept that women are cruel, even embrace the pain. I get mad and I lift weights, its tough love like an alcoholic father who beats his kid to toughen them up. Its a sad dysfunctional way to live but when you live on edge of death and misery you have to find any hope you can.
  20. Hi, I think determining whether you like who you are also means you first have to find out who you are. The author John Steinbeck understanding eachother almost always leads to love but I also think it can apply to yourself as well. Knowing yourself is very important, even military leaders like Sun Tzu believed this. If you want to know more about yourself you can try asking people what they think of you and take personality tests. Ask your husband what he likes about you. No matter who you are there is almost always something good you can say about yourself, find the good things about yourself and understand your flaws and weaknesses and learn to strengthen them or work around them.
  21. Hi Sheen, I have done a lot of martial arts (mostly Taekwondo and Jujitsu) so I have had blows. There is something in psychology called brain plasticity which means the younger you are the easier it is for the brain to heal and form new neural pathways. The top of the brain which is the most exposed is the frontal lobe which has to do with executive thinking and then under the base of the brain there are the most essential functions which are things we often do not have to think about like breathing and other functions. When you have depression, the amygdala can be effected but it is also possible to reprogram your brain. I actually used to be very intelligent and I had a severe blow to my head and trauma in the military and at that time I was very suicidal. I actually remember in the inpatient I would hold my arms up in the sky and I would laugh for hours, people who saw me thought I was psychotic but I was actually doing this to reprogram my brain. Give yourself a chance and also try to be creative because I think it is possible for people to recover from some types of brain damage. Focus on preventing anymore harm and healing.
  22. Hi, I have tried acupuncture and massage therapy. I honestly believe it takes many things to safely get out of depression. Getting massages will help especially if you workout your muscles as it will help them recover so you will get more from a massage if you are working your muscles. I have been betrayed before as well. I think when dating try to find someone you have an emotional connection with. I would make new friends because you don't need back stabbing traitors like that in your life. It is up to you but that is what I would do. I think for every part of your day try to have a mental health plan even if it is as simple as staying hydrated and listening to some good music. You suffered something very painful so the best thing you can do is be proactive for your mental health.
  23. Hi, When I was in the military they told me to sleep as much as you can because sleep deprivation is really harmful for mental health. Getting enough sleep and stayong hydrated will give you more energy. If you have intrusive thoughts try prayer or meditation. Also listening to baroque classical music is good for your brain or try watching self help videos when you feel okay. Sometimes when I feel sad I like to take really long walks and listen to sad Chinese love songs. Maybe have a journal and write you feel before and after an activity so you can find out what helps you. For example for me I realized I did not feel good if I played too much video games because sit too long and feel bad but I also felt bad if I work too much so I find a balance
  24. One important part of almost any job is interpersonal skills or the "soft skills" You have to work with a lot of different people some of them you may not personally like but you have to set prejudices aside to do the best at the job so even if you are competent at the job you might need to work on interpersonal skills to get promoted
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