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bellbottoms

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Posts posted by bellbottoms

  1. Hikkimori don't only exist in Japan. They are young adults who live at home, don't study, don't work. Who for whatever reason have become recluses, I guess because they just couldn't cope with the growing pressure and they were already withdrawn and misunderstood in school. It's not really a diagnose like social anxiety but rather a situation. I only came across the term today on TVtropes and I had to find out more. They seem to be better at helping these people in Japan but there seems to be a little help to get even in my country although not in my town. It's kind of shaking to read about it because there is so much shame and guilt involved, but knowing one is not alone, that it's an actual phenomenon, is just unbeatable.

    I'm a little ashamed just posting this but there was no thread about it, I searched it and got no results (and I'm pretty sure I spelled it correctly, I had to try three times). Perhaps there are no hikikomori on this forum but spreading awareness is still a good thing.

  2. The Road to Eldorado. So, so bad. Extremely lazy writing, just a pair of quirky line-spouting guys happening upon a series of coincidences and an obligatory romantic interest of course whose main trait is sarcasm. Oh and don't get me started on the music... Seriously, Elton John and Tim Rice? What was that, do you have evil doppelgangers that lack musical talent or are just evil? It just sound so good on page: Kenneth Branagh and Kevin Kline, Elton John and Tim Rice... But that's Dreamworks for you, it's just not Disney although they try so hard.

    The funniest thing is that I liked this movie as a kid although it doesn't seem at all like a kidfilm what with Tulio getting it on with that native girl. And I just think it's weird that Miguel, who was not fussy and had more joie de vivre, didn't get the girl. Miguel just seemed more like the womanizing type because, hey, mandolin. Chicks dig musicians, especially happy musicians.

    I feel like I only come here when I really hate a movie but... That's probably because that's exactly how it is.

  3. I don't know if it "helps"... It doesn't fix anything. I'm not very interested in poetry and I don't enjoy writing things that are self-centered. When I write my stories or songs I find that metaphors for my thoughts and situation pop up on their own without it directly being the story of my life, so I find that to be a very good thing, then I don't feel so self-obsessed and trapped in my own unhappiness. Help or not it makes me feel good for a little while, so I suppose it helps in the moment.

    I draw to sometimes but it's not abstract or expressive or "artsy" in any way, but it's another distraction.

  4. I write a bit and I often fantasize stuff that I end up writing. I have on occasion lost the mojo a bit the past year, can't remember if it's happened prior to registering on this forum. Sometimes the door to the Other World just feel shut... I even wrote a song about it because sometimes it's very distressing.

    It's come back, 'though. With the loss of the inability to fantasize goes the ability to write with it, or the will/drive/motivation/words like that. Sometimes I feel this weird... thing whatever inside that just seems to block everything creative and just keeps me painfully restless.

    I find I definitely lose the ability when I'm in a depressed state and when I am I think what's-the-point a lot. A depressed state can take joy from anything, even fantasizing up plots for stories (to me it's also part of the writing process after all, not purely escapism). I've lost interest in drawing, don't think I drew much at all last year. But I did other things but there was a time when drawing brought me great joy and now it feels like those days are gone. A little what's-the-point there, too. I'll never be as good as I want, as good as the pros, so what's the point? I think my creativity is intact, when I did draw I tried to keep it simple to not be put off and I tried some new designs, some of which I found cute. Inspiration is something else, that's where it all starts and that's what has suffered most in my artistic life. But I've also had bursts of inspiration, so....

    To answer your questions: I have no answers. I think it's natural to go through periods of no-inspiration and then have bursts of it, that's how it's always been for me now that I think about it. It's just that when the periods of no-inspiration are very long it feels like a genuine loss.

  5. The Invention of Lying. A pretty funny exercise in shameless wish fulfillment, double standards and general blatant shallowness of the non-ironic kind. Why could Jennifer Garner's character not have gotten some terrible disease that would have left her terribly disfigured that would have cost her all her fortune so she would learn what it's like to be a so called loser and then the love Ricke Gervais had for her would have been put to the ultimate test.

    But I guess that wouldn't have been interesting. Women characters are only good for romantic interests and should stay that way and have no other motivators than babies. A shallow woman wants to marry a shallow guy and it's all: No don't marry him he's so shallow. A shallow fat guy wants to marry a hot shallow chick and it's all: go you you deserve it after all the other success you're character has had earlier!

    Don't get me wrong it's perfectly enjoyable. You can criticise a piece of medium and enjoy it at the same time, ask Anita Sarkeesian.

    I mean, wouldn't it have been just great if Jennifer Garner had married the homeless guy after learning to be less shallow?

    /Proud feminazi that should be making movies

  6. Here it's + something after a short period of - something and lots of snow. But I'm glad it's melting, then the weather may become freezing again and END THE NASTY BLOODSUCKING DISEASE SPREADING TICKS!!! * Pant pant* And get the weird spiders that hog the chanterelles while you're at it!

    On another note, gloves make me feel cool.

  7. There are so many things that make everything so complicated, so many ideas that although good natured just adds to the guilt (I'm looking at you, "Not enough willpower", "not enough motivation", "Nobody likes negative people don't be so negative" "You have to like yourself first..."! (But I digress) (I like saying "But I digress" far too much))

    I think goals can be very helpful, but I just personally generally feel too "mentally elsewhere" most of the time to set any. It's hard to set goals that aren't too within your comfort zone they become meaningless but not too outside of it so it all becomes so daunting you'd rather drift off to Happy Land. And when I find myself in dilemmas, like I do as a rule, I just turn it off ("like a light switch just go click...")

    So that is to not-answer your question. That was more on the subject of setting goals and the difficulty to implement it in practice I guess, how to stop forgetting and stop making excuses without beating yourself up for making excuses and thus not trying enough and in this situation should I exercise self-compassion or beat myself up with my desk lamp? Both good options. At the end of the day the desk lamp isn't going to make the unwanted behaviour go away, self compassion (and this is compassion and NOT pity) will probably have a healthier effect and won't render me a bed vegetable so... I think one step is to stay in the compassion zone first and foremost and not cross the line into self-pity because that is just disguised punishment anyway.

  8. Instrumental piano versions of songs always including the melody of the song. I don't want to learn how to play the melody the end goal is for me to sing on top of the music and I don't need help! Which brings me to another thing that bugs me: vocal guides on karaoke songs.

  9. I wonder where this assumption that poor and sick people are happier than others come from. I think they are just as susceptible to unhappiness as anybody else. And why do people only talk about perfectionism when some of us don't want to be perfect but just good enough? Is it because I'm the only one not remotely close to perfection in this world?

    But what I really came here to say had to do with seeing mistakes in perspective. I'm learning to drive and whenever I screw up and make a mistake I feel absolutely crushed and feel like I should just quit already and think of all reasons I'll never be a suitable driver. But then I remember that some people drive through shopping windows, drive while drunk and do a lot worse. It is important to remember that certainly not everybody is perfect.

    (Not that I've drived anywhere near any shopping windows yet and I'm already shuddering at the thought. Can't glass just be forbidden?)

  10. Well, I try to see the situation as a kind of freedom. If it matters not what I do because I will never get out of this situation that I want out of I can just do what I want. There are some things that I wanted to wait with until my life was sorted out but then I just thought that is never going to happen so I have to do that thing now, before I no longer have the chance/ability to. :/

    I try to live life without wants and expectations. It might seem like a form of "quitting" and perhaps it is- I quit pressure and demands- but I like to think it makes me feel better and allows me to do what I think I'm meant to do. Sorry for sounding so abstract. I've never seen any professionals because I don't see how they can help with the root of my discontentedness. Too often have I gotten the feeling that people don't understand me when I try to explain so I'm just not keen on talking to a stranger and leaving feeling like I didn't get said what I wanted to get said and just be looked at in that faux-sympathetic I-honestly-don't-get-you way. Intuition shall be my new compass, nothing to lose right? I feel like my grammar is a bit off but blegh whatevs.

  11. Well Epic that is a difficult question. I think bad things happened even before there was such a thing as "news" but it is possible they can inspire others to do bad things I guess. I think "good" news really aren't interesting, I mean it's like you say the bad stuff is the rare stuff and the good stuff is stuff that bore us because we take it for granted.

  12. Not necessary do people think it's the "only" alternative, but one can also think it's the "right" alternative.

    For example, my home's a mess at the moment and I should/must clean. I haven't for various reasons but although not-cleaning is an alternative, it is preferable that I clean up before the messyness gets out of hand. And when I don't clean I feel guilty about it until I do. (Then I feel guilt for not cleaning well enough but that's beside the point...)

    I "should" clean because I want to and need to, not because I "should" because the messyness embarasses me and I want to please visitors and not have them come around while it looks the way it does right now. I think a lot of the times when we feel we "should", it's for others and not for ourselves. Not cleaning is unsanitary but really I feel I should clean so I won't be judged for not cleaning, ya know?

  13. I think there is a difference between creativity and inspiration and just writing or drawing. Inspiration is that spark that drives you to pick up a pen to draw or write. Creativity has more to do with the ideas. There's no joy in the activity alone if that spark isn't there.

    Drawing portraits for examples, it's really not that creative. You draw from a reference and it has little room for originality if you're going for realism. But one can still be inspired and I don't know about other's but I don't get good results if I draw/write without being inspired.

    I don't know what sparks my inspiration. Once I got an idea for a song I was struggling with when I was out walking but I don't generally get inspired when I'm out in nature, it just happened that one time. So I don't have one sure way of getting inspired. Everything starts with inspiration, creativity comes second.

    I think inspiration comes in waves and catching it is kind of like trying to remember what you dreamt last night. You just get snippets and you have to catch it before it's gone and if you stay real still you can catch more snippets... If that makes sense, I guess my point is that it's just elusive like that but the more you record your dreams the better you get at it, like with everything else. You just gotta be prepared when the wave comes.

    Even if I am out walking and get inspired doesn't mean the inspiration is still there when I get home. But don't worry I always carry a note book. But it's not a good place to get inspired to draw because I can't bring my drawing pad and my collection of reference images.

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