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About Rayniverse

  • Birthday 10/22/1989

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  • Location
    New Zealand
  • Interests
    Guitar, Graphic Design

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  1. I've been sitting here for about 5 minutes wondering how I can tell you that you're not alone and that there is away out, even if that means finding a way out every single day, but it's hard to put in to words. If there is a single piece of advice I could offer you that I think is 100% genuine and has worked for me... it's to keep pushing yourself outside of your comfort zone, if you want something... go get it, nothing is coming to us automatically. I know the feeling of being alone most of your life, it's the one thing that still really gets to me. In terms of dealing with people I also thought the same as you, I must quit if I can't deal with people... I did a course on leadership run by Dale Carnegie Training (skills for success), it changed my entire perspective on interacting with people and opened my eyes to how many of us suffer through the same, and different problems, I would recommend checking it out and also see if your work could pay for it as it's beneficial to them as well, and I used to be someone who couldn't even stand up in front of a group of people let alone a room of them, and deliver a speech!. The feeling of accomplishing something that you thought was impossible, is the best feeling. I'm happy to chat if you ever want to :)
  2. It's hard but it's worth it, took me a while to open up to a stranger, and the having that weight come off your shoulders is one of the best feelings you could possibly imagine.
  3. Welcome DeeB! I met a woman the other week who told us her story of being in an abusive relationship, for years she struggled, waiting for things to get better on their own, so not to effect the kids etc, her story ended with her saying she wished she had fixed things sooner... and it takes a lot of courage. (she is now happily dating and enjoying life again, and she's in her mid 50's if that is any consolation) No one on this earth deserves to be treated in such a way, you deserve to do what is best for you, work up to making some small changes for yourself, and eventually you will not see change in such a bad way, but be patient & kind to yourself, because you really do deserve it. If my mother was in a relationship like that I would respect any decision she makes, because I love her and want her to be happy. You can do anything DeeB, the only limitation is ourselves.
  4. Tell us your story, Teddy... no better audience than us (or a counselor but that goes without saying!) :) Much luv, bruv!
  5. Woooo what a rollercoaster! I know that feeling. The trick with these darn medications is having them build up in your system, from what I have experienced. I recommend you stick with the medication, but don't take a sudden break from them, because you are essentially going to withdrawal from it which just makes things worse. If you are feeling better, KEEP taking them and use that time of peace to work on getting yourself better :), then you can worry about stopping your meds. Just an idea based on someone who's been through this before, and still am :) Also welcome to the forums my friend!
  6. Welcome ncheung good to see you are helping yourself by coming and chatting to us! It sounds like you could use someone to talk to, I would very much suggest going to see a GP so that he can refer you to counselling or even just go see a counselor... I know that can be a scary thought, I thought that too... I am a 6 foot 3 giant human being who feels like he has to be strong all of the time, so letting my guard down was scary... but so rewarding. My friend, you are making a good decision coming here, and I can't stress enough how helpful talking to someone can be. Now, I don't have too much other advice but what I can say is, you are not alone, you have many friends here who don't even know you yet, so stick around and get to know us, you don't have to make us happy, we are all here trying to do that for ourselves... and we welcome you to join us on our journey :)
  7. Folly, welcome :) Everyone is welcome here, and noticing that you are having problems this early is a good sign, I would very much recommend seeing a counselor, they are good at helping you make sense of things, life, relationships etc. This place provides great support, it's helped me many times, but the thing that has helped me the most is being encouraged to seek help, as scary as that might be. :) Even if you don't think you have depression per say, what you are feeling and doing can lead to making it worse, trust me on that one my friend. Have a great day!
  8. If you go on medication and do counselling (good to do in combination with each other) it gives you a bit of a window where you don't feel soooo bad that you can start learning how to beat it, just don't rely on the medication itself to be the remedy, you are what can heal you. :)
  9. Welcome it's good to see you here! I find this place a great help too. It's good that you are seeking help, very, very good!
  10. It's quite interesting you say that, because I smoked...green very often but it began to trigger my severe depressive episodes. I'd really like to go back, but I'd be trading the momentary pleasure for the risk of setting of days of horrible horrible pain Try Hypnosis... I'm being fully serious.
  11. What do you think about it now? Yeah how did this go?
  12. I can see the joy of life, but I cannot feel it.
  13. I feel disassociated all of the time too, I know the feeling of being able to see the the joy of life but not feel it, it is so very common with depression my friend! people just don't always see it or experience it in the same light, if that makes sense. If anything, I just think it is a sign that you haven't actually discovered where your passions lie yet, I am the same way.... but rest assured you are definitely not alone on this one. Have a smoke... of something... green... I find that helps me, personally.
  14. Thanks everyone, I am feeling much better for now, that was a wee bit of a rollercoaster I must say... I had stopped taking my medication, as my prescription ran out and I just forgot to go back to the doctor and get some more as I kind of felt ok without them... however after about day 3 I crashed, my depression came back so badly, as if I had never started taking meds.... now after a few days back on them I am starting to return to normal, not happy but not 'insanely depressed' which for people like us I guess we could label as happiness seeing as it's all subjective... hah never thought about it like that. Never stop taking your meds abruptly, I've learnt that the hard way, make sure you see the doctor about it first. Thank you for the post, I did see someone for a little bit and it was working well but I had to stop and things just hit a stand still, so I am going to be going back next week and keeping it a regular thing, I do get some excercise, I am a volunteer firefighter for my local fire brigade (in training) and it's been difficult not to quit because it's pretty intense and my depression can get in the way sometimes, but I'm still going at it! just!
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