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reelwell

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  1. i found this post tonight after running into the word "anhedonic" while searching for a cure for many of the same symptoms you all have. i have been fighting fatigue, disinterest, loss of libido, loss of interest, inability to feel ... for about 2.5 years now. i will say that i'm winning, despite having spent the past week in bed, because i do have feelings again - good and bad ones; i have some sex drive and some interest in sex and possibly meeting someone and falling in love again; and i even went to the gym a few times in the past month. those are just a few of my successes. my battle started with a ruptured appendix, went septic, almost died but after 3 weeks in intensive care my "systems" began to work again. i have a theory, and you all may think i'm totally whacked, that a lot of modern medicines destroy important "stuff" in our guts. all those antibiotics they gave me to **** the infections that were ******* me, i think, killed some that my body used to "speak" to my brain. when i got back to work, from bed, i would read financial reports, comprehend them fine, but could not make a decision whether to buy, sell, or hold a stock. my "gut check" was missing. my palate had changed. i couldn't put a glass of red alcohol to my lips. i craved yogurt. my doc put me on a low dose of buproprion, atenolol, and modafinil. i think these are helping enough that i'm not going to give them up. over time i've rebuilt some of the 46 percent muscle loss i experienced (and all the weight i lost) and have managed to pull off some pretty cool things with a modicum of feeling. hang in there folks and check in with your gut.
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