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smithci

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Everything posted by smithci

  1. Not helpful advice at all. Fighting your thoughts and memories makes things worse. It's about gently learning not to act on them and learning that they pass. I have wasted so much time and my mental health trying to 'fight'
  2. Your story is also similar to mine. I'm currently taking sertraline and it is not helping with enjoying things.. And has brought additional problems What is helping is mindfulness and once I have practiced meditation enough I plan to taper off meds and let myself heal from the anhedonia..
  3. You need options because the dating game is very rarely about the 'one date with one person' You could be talking to someone online for years thinking you are getting to know them but only by meeting someone in person do you actually get to know them. It's not desperate, someone you may not be so interested in online may give you big butterflies when you meet. Concentrating on just the one potential date on these things, that's when online dating becomes depressing and not fun as you are finding out by sounds of it
  4. Yeah she might be talking to other guys but that's what the sites are for. You shouldn't just concentrate on one woman either, talk to multiple women and keep your options open. These dating sites need to be treat more like a video game. It is a virtual world, people act very differently to how they do in real life on them. .. I used to take rejection on these things very personally and it was wrong and I was missing out on lots of other potential dates because of that
  5. I personally found therapy useless. I'm trying something else I'm sure it works for many others though
  6. I meditated this morning before work and I am starting to enjoy it. I am looking forward to practicing more
  7. Hi Trevor It's always good to read a positive quote than the usual negative. So thank you again. I feel depressed quite a lot but rarely feel anxious. So sertraline must be helping a little. I'm currently on 100mg I will taper off eventually very slowly. How did you do it? and thank you again
  8. I'm too depressed at the moment to play video games and watch movies too. What I am doing is just playing simple games either platforms or button bashing hack and slash etc, if they are even too hard for me I just tell myself it's because I am ill and can be compassionate with myself. With movies I watch ones usuall that I have seen before that don't require as much concentration. If anything at least it passes the time and gives my brain something other to work on than self pity
  9. I've started doing 8 week mindfulness from a book and only in week 1 the more I do it the more I'm able to calm myself and gently focus on one thing. I'm hopefully starting a group course in September and hope to come off my not very helpful medication in the new year if all goes well.
  10. : ( confused and scared, I'm still going to do it though
  11. 12:35 minutes in Zindel Segal explains how mindfulness can impact reward and positive emotion, still a hard sell to anyone who never feels positive 24 hours a day but what do i have to lose?
  12. Thanks Jaiho. Paxil was good for a number of years and years but it made me very arrogant and selfish that's some of demons I'm struggling with today. It was almost euphoric. I would do a switch but right now it is too risky because I am on a warning for my sick absence at work. I would maybe go back to paxil (horrendous start up effects) or try an snri such as venlafaxine. I'm carrying on with the mindfulness book it's early days but the parts on how to deal with your moods and thoughts are helping. I'm even considering doing an evening course in mindfulness starting in September.. My real goal is to be med free and experience real life. I'm 33 and have been on meds most of my adult life. I was med free most of last year and I had some of the best experiences of my life
  13. Because I have had really bad depression with suicidal thoughts. I am in the UK and the doctors are clueless with meds. Believe me if there was a drug better suited to my condition I would take it but over here you have to work with what you get
  14. I'm currently taking sertraline for depression and feel anhedonic and numb. Will mindfulness meditation be any good if I can't feel things / be genuinely interested in things?
  15. I only intended it to be for 6 months but it really hasn't improved anything. I have been numb to good feelings since trying all these different meds, with a few moments of contentment here and there. The only thing that scares me is the bad suicidal ideation I've had since being on these different meds and I'm worried it'll get worse if I come off. I have to resort to sleep meds every other night and if I don't sleep ok that's when I have my dark days. I know my depression is more situational than anything. I have some regrets about leaving my ex of 5 years and moving in on my own. But being numb to everything I don't see how I'll ever recover naturally. I am fairly confident of the mindfulness training. It's all about being more compassionate with yourself etc. You should Google it.. Best of luck.. Things are never as bad as they seem and I'm hopeful next year will be better than this one..
  16. I was on 50mg for 4 weeks and been on 100mg for about 4 weeks. Mindfulness is all about not trying to fight your thoughts but rather just noticing them and gently bringing your attention back to other things you're aware of.. Your breath, your body etc.
  17. Everyone is different, everything functions normally for me but I could take or leave sex to be honest. I'm not in a relationship at the moment but I'm still young and being single forever isn't part of the plan. I haven't felt true interest or excitement in anything either.. I'm giving it another few months in the mean time I'm learning the 8 week mindfulness program which seems to be helpful
  18. I too feel numb and dont feel passion for anything. Let me know what your psych says ?
  19. I stayed on strong medication way longer than I needed to. I wish I could undo that
  20. Thanks 16bit that does help. Are you on medication? How old are you if you don't mind me asking? I think part of my problem is isolation. I had the opportunity to go to a friends house tonight. But they would all be sitting drinking and smoking and some getting high. I don't have any real sober friends so I barely see anyone. I'd love to get back on a dating site or out clubbing and meet a nice girl and I'm in touch with some girls that I could possibly form more than friendship with. The problem is i'll just feel guilty because of having no positive emotions and lack of sex drive, everything still works but the thought of it is not exciting or pleasurable. My moods seem to be worse when I get really poor sleep, been worse since starting zoloft. I'm starting to get dependent on over counter sleeping meds for an OK nights sleep as the doctor won't give me anything.. I know if I could stop ruminating about feeling bad I'd sleep better but it's a constant cycle. Maybe I could try total sleep deprivation one night. I don't know but I'm getting really desperate
  21. Thanks but I can't see me lasting years managing to keep everything together, home, job etc
  22. Thank you for your reply. Since I started with all the meds the last few feel good things I have left have gone including humour and sex I can only feel sadness and boredom now. I don't know what's left to do
  23. I'm so tired of it all For the last 6 months I have not enjoyed life. I am not exaggerating. I have tried different meds currently in sertraline 100mgs and don't feel it's doing anything. Also tried therapy. Doing things I'd normally enjoy and going to work. I'm tired of keeping up the act. It's all for nothing.. Nothing gives me pleasure.. Even for a second. I look forward to the unrest full few hours sleep I get every night just to get to away from this hell.. There's no help for me left.. I love my mother and I can't take me own life but it feels like I don't have one and never will I'm crying my eyes out here but it's providing no relief
  24. Anyone? Things are getting worse and doctors and the mental health system in the UK are No Help
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