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Everything posted by ReticulatedFear

  1. I've had a fair few times that I've really missed feeling utterly defeated and just wanted so badly to have a good cry, I really find that it can be addictive or can feel like the only thing that can be a sort of release, that numbness is a feeling I truly hate though I feel so cut off from the world and just leads down a dark path in my case at least, hope you feel better
  2. I've was diagnosed with major depressive disorder and serious anxiety with it about 5 years ago, since the last year or so, I've recently gained a new "quirk" to put it nicely, I now find myself very often getting dejavu and getting myself on horrible tracks of remembering what I tell myself was just a bad dream and not real, some interchange with my life and others are just completely different stories that have never happened, but as I was remembering them they seemed so real and I was genuinely worried about this, it has died down a lot but I still get these weird fantasies and it's scary, I never had to deal with anything like this before. While I don't think that it is a very likely thing to have your state of mind change drastically, I do believe that a mental illness is able to evolve and possibly develop new symptoms over time if not treated well or through self medication. Mental illness is something I've never seen as easily definable or set in stone it's something that can get better or worse depending on the circumstances.
  3. Hi there I'm new here, I've had depression/ anxiety for about 5 years now but recently had a new symptom that has been bothering me as of late. I've always been a bit of a day dreamer and would fantasize a lot about a lot of different things, but as of late I've found some of the things I've been imagining have felt more like something that I had been remembering than imagining this May be hard to understand if you haven't experienced it and for the most part doesn't bother me too often, but sometimes the things I'm "remembering" are rather unpleasant, and if they turned out to be true would make me feel Terrible, both because of it happening and me forgetting it in the first place I usually realise if something is just imagined it made up relatively quickly but the fact that there's some serious anxiety about some of these things makes me upset that this is happening to me, I meann I wasn't exactly the greatest around people as is without things they say triggering false memories. My memory is pretty bad and the anti depressants I take make it worse I believe but I find it difficult to not fill In gaps of my memory with imagined events that happened, I even remembered a whole "story" if it could be called that, I have forgotten a lot of it but some still sticks with me, theres good and bad memories I get usually ones that are neither good or bad and even sometimes some nice ones but I really would prefer not to have any Sorry if I'm rambling, in summation I was just wondering if anyone has had this or a similar problem and if they had any advice or examples of what helped them. Thank you for reading, and of course any and all replies would be very much appreciated do please have a nice day all
  4. Hi,I'm new here but have had issues with depression and anxiety for about 5 years now, I'm 19 and recently started a new course for higher learning after leaving school before finishing. I feel like a real dropkick as of late, it seems like every time I see an attractive woman, or rarely a guy I can't help but check them out, this might not seem like a bad thing in small doses, but I made someone feel uncomfortable due to me checking them out a little too much. Sometimes I just can't seem to help myself to take a peek every now and then, I didn't realise I was noticed at the time but now that I've been informed indirectly I feel like such a jerk. I don't want to objectify, disrespect, or otherwise make someone feel awkward, but I can't get the nerve to talk to let alone apologise for my actions, I only did it one day, and I wasn't excessive by any means but I still believe she was offended, now that some time has passed I still feel extremely guilty for what I did. Im not 100% positive that she was really bothered by it, and if i apologise out of the blue if it would just possibly start drama that I don't believe I could deal with. if i just stop looking at her and try to be respectful when the opportunity arises can i respect myself again? I realise this is a pretty pathetic problem but any replies would be appreciated.
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