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About Lynn1954

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    Sometimes Chicago, sometimes Pittsburgh!!

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  1. I have some encouraging news for you. In my experience, 10mg did not help me enough, but 20mg helped me perfectly. So, even though you've been on Lexapro this time for four to five weeks, you've only been on 20mg for a few days. So, keep calm and carry on with 20mg daily for a few more weeks. The relief and happiness you need might come to you if you continue for more weeks. Good luck!
  2. Lynn1954

    How Do You Feel Right Now #6

    @salparadise6132 Here is some encouragement, as you requested, to end the toxic friendship you mentioned. You CAN do it, and you'll feel so much better, as you said that the friendship makes you feel horrible, Do you plan to do a direct announcement "I'm not going to continue this friendship", or a fade-away by not answering the phone, declining invitations to get together, etc.
  3. Lynn1954

    I dont want myself

    Dear LittleKid, You are smart to post your message here, because there are many compassionate and kind people here who do understand all the pain in your life. If you stay and post more messages, you'll receive a lot of answers that will help you to handle all your challenges. You're very overwhelmed now, and your mind is swirling with tons of trouble. There are ways to calm down, feel better, focus on one problem at a time, and you need some guidance and encouragement to find the strength to do that. Please tell me more about two things you said "No one understands me." and "I can't even talk to someone." Give me an idea of who you've tried to talk to, who you've tried to ask for help. Tell me how your parents fit in your picture: possible source of help and comfort, or totally clueless, or abusive? Tell me about the adults at your school: guidance counselors, any teacher who you like and might confide in? People your age: do you have brothers / sisters, cousins, classmates, neighbors who you can talk to? Your best first step is to find at least one trusted, competent adult who can guide you, and at least one person close to your age who feels like a friend to you. Please let me know if you already have one adult and one peer to start with, or if you will need some help to find an adult and a peer to be on your side.
  4. Lynn1954

    The "How Do You Feel Right Now?" Topic (5)

    Hello, JD, Just sending you some compassion and caring today. It seems your recent struggles are more acute than some previous times that were challenging but manageable. I'd like to do my part as an Internet friend to help you. I'm not sure what help that will be. It's pretty clear that what you need and want is to keep your job. So, can we help you make a plan that balances specific tasks plus recommended mind games for yourself that will reduce the pressure both factually and figuratively? When I've struggled with work challenges, it helped me to ponder each task against two criteria: does this task need to be done excellently, or does it just need to be done? I believe you've always been a perfectionist, but some tasks can be done sufficiently and safely without perfection. Does that concept apply to your situation?
  5. Dear KaitoKid, I'm sorry that you're physically sick with a cold or flu. I'm also sorry that you're feeling mentally and emotionally challenged with depression, anxiety, or other feelings that you lead you to think about and possibly hope for dying. Are you a teenager? Some teens have diagnosed depression or anxiety, others just have intermittent feelings and frustrations that are typical of that age, but should also be discussed. You asked a specific question, whether declining medicine for a physical ailment means you're wishing and hoping to die. But the answer requires looking at your bigger picture: it's best to discuss your mental health with your parents and your family doctor, and discuss with a counselor or therapist, and then possibly, if indicated, consult a psychiatrist. These three professionals can determine if you are diagnosed with depression or anxiety that requires ongoing treatment, and determine the best treatment plan for you. In general, emotionally healthy people handle minor physical illnesses with either medication methods, or non-medicated methods such as sleep, rest, water, soothing foods, etc. and neither method is related to wanting to live or die. Because you're currently associating your physical illness with your state of mind, it would probably be best to discuss this with your parents and the other professionals mentioned above.
  6. Ok, understood! Then, I'm thinking, don't even analyze it or figure out why, just enjoy the feeling. I'm happy you've found some relief, and I hope it lasts a long time!!
  7. Hello, Kort, Yes, I can assure you that you're not alone, you're not crazy. I've had experiences similar to you. Don't worry, and just enjoy that job and enjoy that feeling! You are not crazy!! Many people with depression love their jobs. I've not loved every job I had, but one of the jobs, where I worked a long time, alleviated my depression symptoms and I was happy when I worked there. Depression is not always 100% pervasive 24 / 7. Situations, distractions, and one's current thoughts and attention can make depression feel better or worse. Finding activities that alleviate depression symptoms is one of the biggest goals of therapy. Also, Lexapro is one of the most effective meds for depression, it's the med that I take. So perhaps you've finally found the med that's right for you. I believe when you say that doctors and psychiatrists are mystified, BUT they shouldn't be. The combo of meds, therapy, and activities is the entire protocol to alleviate depression. So, you are one of the success cases!! Maybe they just don't see such success very often!! Keep loving your job as long as you possibly can. Some people do love their job / career for a lifetime. That could be you!!
  8. Lynn1954

    The "How Do You Feel Right Now?" (4)

    Sadness today. I got a little comfort by eating cookies. My mind is agitated today, racing thoughts. On some days I do have peace of mind, but not today. I want peace of mind. I want my problems to go away.
  9. Lynn1954

    The "How Do You Feel Right Now?" (4)

    Dearest BabyGoth, Your Dad is so wrong, and unfortunately he is a dangerous man. I'm going to make a suggestion, please consider it before rejecting it, or at least discuss it here. Perhaps you or your brother should report your Dad to the police for physical abuse, or get someone that you know to report him on your behalf? Before discussing all the pros and cons, right now in the U.S. there is a growing movement to speak up and report all kinds of abuse including physical abuse, domestic abuse, bullying, and sexual abuse. My growing awareness of this leads to my suggestion. How old are you, and how old is your brother? Do you know the proper channels in U.K. for reporting this abuse? You're in my thoughts, BG.
  10. Lynn1954

    The "How Do You Feel Right Now?" (4)

    Thank you, all, for being here and making this thread a comforting and welcoming place to be. It's a refuge. So many people here, with troubles of their own, reach out to others with kindness, compassion and wisdom. I'm always impressed that folks here often know each other well, remember and understand each other's stories, and answer with genuine personal attention, and not trite cliches and platitudes. People who feel that no one listens to them in real life come here, and people really listen to them. It's wonderful!
  11. Dear GAJ, I totally understand what you're saying and how you feel, because I've experienced that same feelings as a woman when I'm at a first date with a man. I feel insecure and quiet. Here is the good news: you should not change your personality at all, you don't need to. The only thing you need, for now, is a simple plan that involves a handful of questions to ask, a handful of interesting or humorous stories, and most important, a plan to be as kind and thoughtful to your date as you possibly can. Most people don't mind the usual first date questions (where you grew up, went to school, work) but you can plan a little more conversation-producing questions: "What was the best vacation you've ever been on" or "Right now, where is your fantasy vacation destination?" or "Did you ever have something make you laugh so hard that you couldn't stop laughing?" if you like this idea, I can suggest a few more questions. Interesting or humorous stories are easy: maybe you have a few of your own, or just surf the Internet for some of the latest trending topics. Being kind and thoughtful: listen to her. Do some old-fashioned things like helping her with the chair, helping her put her coat on. (If she expresses independent objection to the helping stuff, then don't do) I have more very effective advice if you're still there and you answer my reply.
  12. Lynn1954

    Where is my spark?

    Dear Ruthless, You're not alone, so many of us feel the same way that you feel. Sometimes it's comforting to know that you're not alone in this feeling, but we all wish and know it would be more comforting if the feeling just went away! If you have genuine depression, there are many choices that include medications, therapy and learning coping skills that can help you. Please write again an tell us more about you. Lynn
  13. Lynn1954

    The "How Do You Feel Right Now?" (4)

    Bad day, so sad, so depressed, why am I feeling this way?
  14. Lynn1954

    The "How Do You Feel Right Now?" (4)

    Hi, Everyone! I'm feeling lonely, and unmotivated, so I'm grateful that a few of you are on this thread at the current moment, "in real time". Lynn
  15. Lynn1954

    Depression and Work/Career

    P.S. hey, morecoffee, your username gave me a great idea and I'm going to make myself a fresh cup of coffee right now!