idkusername465

But you do. You're stuck at a job that constantly undermines your sanity, you're responsible for paying for a house you don't even live in, for a woman you're not even with anymore, all while being in perpetual debt yourself. And yet, day after day you do what's required of you and persevere! I'd say you're pretty damn strong!

Glad everything went well.

Hey Charlee, I'm so sorry to hear you're feeling so hopeless and sad. The weight of depression can feel almost unbearable sometimes. I'm glad you decided to get help for your depression, both in writing your problems here in the forums and seeking help in therapy. I hope your therapist is able lighten your burden and feel you with joy again. And don't worry about your message being "too depressing" this is the depression forums, this is where we come together and discuss our illness and how to get better. Never apologize for being yourself here and letting out all your thoughts and feelings. Also, I wanted to ask how you were able to tag your post with "depressed, anxious, depression, etc"? I don't know how to do it.

I'm personally thinking of going back to college so I can major in computer science so I can eventually become a software developer. Do you have any general tips for me? Sorry to put you on the spot.

I feel fine

to the forums Saprkzz! It was very brave of you to open up to us given your past experiences with therapy and other forums. I have been apart of this community for over 6 years and I can assure you that this is one of the most welcoming places you will find on the entire internet! The people here will listen to you and won't judge you like so many have in your personal life. We just "get it" because we've been through it ourselves. I'm so sorry to hear you've been hurting for so long. The weight of panic attacks, depression, and anger must be immense. I can only imagine what you're going through. Feel free to continue to share your story with us and we will help you to the best of our ability. Wishing you the best!

to the forums! Feel free to browse the forums and read everyone's stories. And don't be afraid post your feelings, we will listen and not judge you.

I haven't spoken to you in the chat room in a while I hope everything is going well with you!

It's truly amazing how one day we can feel like the weight of the world is on top of us, and the next day we can feel ready to punch life right in the face. Wishing you the best of luck Sober!

I stopped using social media a few years ago and I haven't looked back. I'm much happier without it, and I think more people should consider taking a break from it.

I'm going on vacation this week. My grandparents will be there and they can be a little toxic sometimes especially my grandfather. Hopefully everything goes well. Wish me luck!

A little introspective. A little sad.

I've always been soo terrified I would become that person who becomes so destructive and toxic to not only himself, but to his friends family that people begin to actively believe they lives would be much better without me in it. I think many of us who suffer from depression share this fear. Reading this thread just makes me incredibly sad. Sadly, in the end, the others are right, you need start treating yourself as the #1 priority and make sure your mental health is being taken cared of. Best of luck to you!

So I'm finally making some friends in my program. The trouble is I have a tendency to become obsessive, jealous and just insecure. I start obsessing over how and when people contact me, how often they contact me, and I just all around find myself obsessively checking my phone to see who has or hasn't contacted me. I try to distract myself and keep myself busy but that only helps a little. One of the advantages to not having any friends at all is I felt free from constantly evaluating whether or not people liked me. Now I'm in this perpetual state of... waiting, just waiting for things to happen. It's hard to explain I find myself constantly worrying if I'm even good enough to be friends with these people. I ask myself "Do I deserve this? Do these people even like me?" I also find myself jealous if people I'm friends with are talking and laughing with others as I seem to think they will replace me with them. I know these things stem from a complete lack of self confidence and deep-rooted insecurities but knowing that doesn't really help me.

This is a good topic, I was wondering the same thing. I will be in the work force pretty soon so I can use some tips as well!