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Cristi89

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  1. I am going through the EXACT same thing! My friends and family keep saying "Just keep trying, it has to work out" and that doesn't help at all. I'm unemployed, went to college for a few years as an English major but it was just not for me. All the education you have sounds wonderful :) I'm hoping to find a job in the animal care field, that's my dream job but until that happens I've been searching for anything. Temporary jobs like data entry or being one of those people who sit in a model home all day and pass out brochures if people show up. Basically anything to provide income for the time being, to ease the pressure of finding My Dream Job. I try not to think too far ahead, take things one day at a time. When I think about the possibilities of never getting a job, I get so overwhelmed I become so hopeless and think I'm supposed to die. So for my own health, I avoid that. My first priority is myself. A job isn't worth making my life miserable. I have been dealing with depression and adhd most of my life. It wasn't until I started therapy and medicine that my social anxieties and negative views of everything got any better. It gave me the boost I needed. Considering life involves coping with people and situations everyday, the tools and insight I'm gaining is priceless. Hope any of that makes sense lol I hope you find a job you love and are passionate about, and not just one your depression wants :)
  2. Thank you :) Its a work in progress. When I don't fall into my black hole, I realize I have an illness that will take time and a team effort to recover from. i just have to keep climbing out until that hole gets filled up! It's just really hard to stay tough and positive. Maybe I'm putting too much pressure on myself to get a job NOW when really I need to focus on me. I thought I was ready but maybe I'm not.
  3. Thanks for the responses :) I actually am in the process of having an awful day. So that's quite a burden. I just don't have that conviction things will get better and its all gonna be worth it. Most days I'm fine and hopeful (that took time and effort) but days like today come and I just think I'm supposed to die. Which is totally illogical obviously. Thanks for the advice! Actually I love animals... for over a year now I volunteer at an animal shelter. I'm good at it, it's rewarding and fulfilling. The only thing is, I'm also trying to get a job in the animal care field (I'm unemployed) so being told no after so many job interviews just knocks me down every time. That's actually why I'm feeling pretty crappy today. It's my passion, so I figure since it means so much to me, it makes sense a setback won't feel very good.
  4. Hi all.. this is my first post!! :) Wasn't sure where else to put this. I've been lurking on this awesome site for a few months now. It really helps to see other people share their stories and see I can get better too :) I've struggled with depression beginning as a teenager and now as a young adult. It was like I didn't get the guide book to Life. It wasn't until I hit rock bottom and wanted to die that I realized my limited coping skills CLEARLY weren't working. I started therapy and read an amazing book by Dr. David Burns called Feeling Good. Seriously saved my life. Anywho, it's only been 4 months since I sought medical attention. I started therapy which I love. That's when I found out I have ADHD which explained some of my hardships growing up. I take Effexor everyday for my depression symptoms but its also worked wonders on my anxiety. I still have some days I wake up and feel like someone turned my mood down way low. I'm working on stringing those good days together. I was wondering what other people do to build their self esteem. Somewhere in my life I had it engrained in me to be self-degredating and it's a very hard habit to shake.
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