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unawaredeprssed

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  1. i don't even know if i wanna accept it as an illness or as anything else for tht matter.... it less tumultuous just to dissassociate from the feelings and pretend everything is ok lol....................... goddd daaang this disease to heck
  2. for me sleep works as an escape route from depression... i take a tablet of melatonin and go to sleep at nights. I sleep longer when i have feel depressed ....simply put my bed is where i go and stay to get away from it .... even if temporarily. After i wake up my mood goes from negative to neutral so i guess in a way it feels better.
  3. felt like i stood my ground better at work became active enough to post on these forums won a pc mp game after several defeats ​
  4. HI every one Im a rather newer member of DF and wanted to share my thoughts on this important topic. I recently found out i've had depression for many years (since childhood) . Finding this ofcourse was no fun. When i was going through my roughest/most dangerous bouts, it was God who words i used to rescue myself from darkness. I repeated His praises to give my mind some sense of much needed peace/stability. It was Him who i would turn to when i felt extra lonely. I don't know if im the best person of my faith or not. Many a times after getting a little better, i would just forget about .... or would not have enough time in my busy day to praise Him. He helped me , listened and was there. I wish to be a better servant of The One who helped. Depression is a might beast... to slay i believe we need an unshakable faith, persistance and help of the Almighty these are my thoughts/beliefs on subject of depression and religion. Feel free to share yours. unawaredepressed
  5. thank you for contributing everyone... right now my goals are to decrease my negative thought patterns and to learn to be more active/involved ... also i gotta say im kinda almost envious of the people who cry... i feel like crying at times ... never can.... i know crying lightens a heavy heart but its the weirdest thing... no matter how hard i try or bad i feel, there are no tears .... ​ im also envious of that smiley right now ​
  6. .... what if you're scared to make that decision?scared if you would be able to handle whats coming next or not?
  7. luis thank you for taking the time to read and reply to the post the co worker situation feels bad at times b/c she has major depression (unrelated to work) and despite it she somehow manages to work ~50 hours/week while i can only grind it out for ~16 hours/week ...i am very new to being aware of depression but as i recently started reading more and more about it i always thought my poor work ethic and general laziness/inactivity is due to depression. after seeing people like this in the world who work like crazy night and day even when suffering makes me think a part of my inactivity could just be due to my upbringing and personal beliefs i got diagnosed with depression in 2011 ... a year has passed by and i feel like i haven't tried my hardest to face the world (one example being through work) and i wonder at times if part of that is just my laziness ... have anyone else ever had this feeling? its a feeling i wanted to express infront of the outside world thank you any and all for reading/replying my post
  8. i have found practicing affirmations after waking up and before going to bed help
  9. for me prayers/meditation really help ... they seem to make me positive if only for a short while
  10. i really like the original post ... lots of inspiration compacted in a short speech (thumbs up)
  11. i realize this might seem strange to many but in my case, from a young age, i was never taught for some reason the habbit/importance of hard work.I was raised in a very loving, affectionate and supportive environment but my parents were always at work and also didn't believe much in being forceful /strict with kids (which i believe is necessary at times) I am 25 and learned that i' ve had depression. Im well aware getting out of it requires work but i don't have that sense of work ethic or being active mentality i see in so many other depressed people that helps them go on with life. I am aware that depression itself actually rots away a person ability to be active and to work but i find that having been habituated to that belief system PLUS having depression completely dessimates any productivity level i have . At times when i don't feel depressed and i know i have to get a lot of work done, i don't simply b/c its feels like going against my habituated mind set ............. The biggest thing that gets me about this at times when i see someone like a co worker of mine who has depression and had several extreme bouts work like 50 hours/ week and i work avg 16-24 hours ... it feels really bad. it really sucks b/c depression by its very nature just ends up giving more power to this habbit :verysad3:​ I just wanted to throw this out there. Any ideas, comments, suggestions on this?!
  12. i woke up today at 7 pm ... i had gone to bed at 4 am last night....i slept 15 hours ... b/c of depression... b/c of one abnoxious emotional b**** at work..... i did my job ... even went the extra mile... all just to be disrespected and degraded ​
  13. I think one thing that made a difference was a decision I made. I always get caught up thinking how far 'behind' my friends I am. BINGO!!! thats exactly what i feel thts why im always rushing things up.. i feel that every one around me is 'ahead' of me somehow and i have to hurry up if i am to be at the same level as them. everyone always telling me to slow down
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