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Showing content with the highest reputation since 01/02/2012 in Blog Comments

  1. 6 points
    Man of Sorrows

    Close Call

    Don't let the depression win. You are in control of your life, not this illness. You are in control. Reach out and get the help you need. You can overcome this. I believe in you.
  2. 4 points

    Just a poem.

    And Jalen gives light And rights dark wrongs And Jalen gives life When singing these songs The dark was in, and now its out For brother Jalen, I punch and shout!
  3. 3 points


    Fear has to be depression and anxiety's cousin. Fear is a major trigger for me. I did lose everything in the 5 years. It's hard to get past but with support from each other we can and will.
  4. 3 points

    Been Awhile, Weather, Oh & a Small Rant

    I can't speak for others, but I appreciate that you spend your personal time to help people here, so thank you.
  5. 3 points

    I Hate Mornings....

    I'm taking my girls camping for two days Monday and Tuesday. I wish we could have done it over the weekend. I would have liked not to have missed two of the last days at APH. But it has to end sometime. I just hope I'll be able to stay present while we're camping. Our family friends who I'm going less (and his girlfriend who I have not met yet) is a nice straight guy but he is quiet and have very limited range in conversation. And so I spend a lot of time in my head or trying to start conversations for what she has little place to go. I do not have money for this, and luckily he knows that in his helping take care of some of the cost. I want to treat us at least a contingent last hurrah, something good for the girls and maybe even a good memory for me. Then I can deal with the next day when I get back. My poor wife is coughing, doesn't feel well, and is taking herself in the girls to get passport photos for their plans trip to Albania at the end of this month. Life makes no sense at all right now. I really wish I had better to give them. I keep thinking to myself, what does it mean to love myself, and how could have helped? Isn't it nice and great that I now know I have a right to pursue my own values and beliefs and Ambitions? Yeah, wouldn't it be nice if I'd known that 10 years ago. And it seems quaintly funny that I keep posting here hoping for some kind of catharsis or step forward.
  6. 3 points

    Close Call

    How are you doing now Jalen? Worried about you ! ! !
  7. 3 points

    Leaving DF for Now ~ Farewell and Thank You

    Best wishes to you River Light!
  8. 3 points

    Snowy White Christmas!

    OMG girl! it is literally starting to snow! no joke!!!!!!!! lightly but it's there!
  9. 3 points

    Snowy White Christmas!

    yay!!!!!! I don't even mind shovelling it so bring it on!!!
  10. 3 points

    Snowy White Christmas!

    I agree River! I love it. I'm a little jealous. It's been minus 18C here and no snow lol. I think it's supposed ot start up tomorrow. cross your fingers for me and enjoy that white beauty you have!!!
  11. 3 points


    I sure will keep y'all in my thoughts and I might even try out a prayer or two for you! I can tell you from experience that anxiety level during the day is directly related to the amount and quality of sleep you get at night. Insomnia = anxiety. Hopefully her doctor is one of the good ones and treats the insomnia first. If you guys can get her sleeping right, chances are great that her anxiety symptoms will fix themselves. Good luck to you, your mama, and everybody else in your family!
  12. 3 points

    A Day In a Cult

    The line between religion and cults is basically non-existent. You could make the argument that all religious sects are cults. All of it freaks me out and makes my legs want to run away.
  13. 3 points


    Anita is 1000% right...we put so much pressure on ourselves and allow others to pressure us about these sorts of things....but in the long run, they tend to matter only a little, if they matter at all. You're still you, no matter the outcome of these exams. Good luck anyway, though!
  14. 3 points

    ..Mulligan, Please?

    LOL. Maybe he's demonstrating the phrase carpe diem! To seize the day, jump and have a fantastic day/life full of adventure! Hehe =)
  15. 3 points

    In Love With Me or Not?

    Congratulations on having a access to the feeling of love and floating in the air. I had crushes but never really fell in love. I wouldn't close the door on love. Maybe there are things to be learned from this turn of event? Perhaps there were red flags? I believe your next relationship will be much more satisfying because this event will help you know yourself better and improve your ability to filter out guys like him.
  16. 3 points

    Abuse Throwback

    I know you're hurting @RiverLight, break-ups stink no matter what. There's always a dream broken. But just a comment on that conversation.. You did say yourself that you don't wish him to contact you and he basically said the same thing back to you, perhaps in different terms.
  17. 3 points

    Tired Son/ Lonely Man

    You.re no monster, Empire. If your father treated you like sxxt, you're nothing like him. You won't agree I know. But you ARE Fxxxing Awsome. You are important to me. And though we're both just pseudonyms online(and I really DON'T have a soul) I MEAN IT. I don.t know if things get better or not.. But you're no monster. World would be a better place with more people around like you. People who actually care.
  18. 3 points
    no good relationship

    Ugh, the birds are chirping...

    I plan on being alone cooper my dog loves to watch the nieghborhood fireworks i wish you the best today
  19. 3 points
    That relationship you're building with yourself you mentioned last time? I bet that hasn't felt so ****ing good! Keeping this strictly positive, you * have a nice and perhaps even timely reminder of what you are leaving behind * you didn't M***** anybody though probably would have had a very good defense * obviously are swimming in saintly virtue
  20. 3 points

    Note To Your Stupid Self...

    I’ve found myself in this kind of situation before. It’s hard to believe that it’s the depression, and not just people truly not liking you. And sometimes there are those around you that are jerks and make you feel bad. That’s not your fault. It’s theirs. If you do something nice and they don’t appreciate it, it’s their problem. Those people are missing out on a good, caring friend. I’ve had to move away from those kinds of relationships myself. And I’ve been able to find better, caring people for it. If those who are around you are too unwise to value your friendship, I do believe that there are others out there who will. And give that “little tiny voice” a mic. It knows what it’s saying. It’s the depression. You definitely count in this world. :)
  21. 3 points

    The Noise Inside

    Hi Lady M, I know what you mean about everything taking so much effort. Racing thoughts while trying to sleep won't leave me alone as well. You're such a great person and a great friend to me, and yet I'm helpless to help you... It's such a bad feeling, not being able to help a friend in need. :( But you'll get through these rough times. I know you will. (((Lady Mozzer)))
  22. 2 points

    Futility and void

    ...Ahem..just wanted to say that though all the above is true enough, I tend to go overk ill when my mind goes on a tangent breaking orbit into the great unknown.. and I am truly sorry for the negative outbursts. Sorry @Depressedgurl007. You deserve better than my puerile explosion. Season's greetings and all that. I mean it boys and girls, I hope next year will be better for all of us.
  23. 2 points

    Petty Things

    So a guy came up to me and one of my lady friends the other night and gave me a piece of paper that said he was homeless,no food etc. (you know the story) and that he was mute and couldn't speak...the sorrow I felt in his eyes was true... luckily I speak sign,and conversed with him a bit about life in general etc. I gave him what I had in my wallet (Im a spend money for the day kind of guy,and am really good at math so everything is covered anyways and at the end of the day any money I have left over,I don't feel I need anyways) but I gave it to him...and some random guy was like he's probably on meth etc. And I laughed at him,I didn't care what his burdens was,the only thing that mattered in the moment...was he needed help,and I had it to give. Don't care much for the details...bc the point is much simpler than the reasons for him to ask or me to give...you got them some gifts,that's all that really matters isn't it? You thought about them when maybe no one else did...and the small anxieties,well I can relate too. (Little background on me I have PTSD) and I wanna hang out or enjoy places,events or things with people but it's hard...sounds and movement put me in a survival state of mind again and it's so heavy in the civilian world,but I overcome it sometimes with shear strength or will... speaking to others isn't my thing and I'm a silent kind of guy...but I throw on a smile and speak to people if I need too. And it really isn't that bad in the end...of course PTSD is funny in the sense that it is gonna be there anyways no matter what I do to overcome it in the moment I still come full circle to fight it again whether it be 5min or 5hrs, my brain is just wired different now from being in a life or death situation for too long... doctor's say it's as "simple" as that lmao 🤣... remember what I said about the present and how the past and future only exist in that state? ...once it's over with,you'll be like it wasn't that bad or that was simple/easy,why did I worry...so think about how everything will go right and if it doesn't work like that (bc it usually doesn't) turn it into something fun,a game or an adventure for you and your family in the end...change it up a bit...good or bad,it will atleast be an experience rather than a chore...or a burden 🙂 wish you luck!
  24. 2 points

    Epic Fail

    I'm really sorry you're going through such a rough time JD. I hope you can keep hanging on and things get better for you very soon.
  25. 2 points

    Waiting for the Ice Queen

    When will the lakes freeze over and will you be going ice fishing further north?
  26. 2 points

    Waiting for the Ice Queen

    Thanks for sharing my friend and you took some really nice photos
  27. 2 points

    "Just be Happy"

    I can relate. Thanks for speaking your mind JD.
  28. 2 points

    Depression Fraud.

    You are not a fraud... depression and anxiety are equal opportunity demons and have no prejudice with regards to race, gender, ethnicity, or socioeconomic background. Your pain is valid and needs no qualifiers, prerequisites or justification.
  29. 2 points

    Wow. Long time, no blog. I'm grateful for...

    Hey guys : ) I've tried this too over the years... I wonder if there's one important element to making it "work". I think maybe we tend to write down the things we feel we SHOULD feel grateful about. It seems like an obvious thing to do, because given depression, it's sometimes hard to FEEL anything much, let alone gratitude. But I think this subtle difference (what you you genuinely FEEL grateful for and what is stuff you "SHOULD" objectively feel grateful for) is a huge difference. When we suffer from depression, people point out to us all the time what we "should" feel grateful for. It's not a help. It's an additional burden. So if we do this to ourselves - and it can be so subtle - it can creep up on us in a gratitude list, even without us meaning to do it... I think it can be quite damaging and it can certainly make the task of keeping a gratitude journal turn into something crappy. I think true gratitude - the stuff we FEEL is often not the stuff everyone else (including us?) thinks we should be grateful about. For example, I'm grateful that when it rains there are less people out and about, cos I don't like crowded places. Or, I am grateful that I have a few colleagues at work that are incompetent beyond belief. Their presence in our company means that anyone who's vaguely skilled and competent is not under any pressure, because "OMG look at such and such's work". In theory, my boss needs to let them go - their work is a nightmare and an embarrassment to themselves and the company and customers comment on it all the time. But my boss can't bring himself to do it. So, given that the situation is what it is, I'm actually grateful for their presence, cos it massively takes the pressure off me and my other colleagues! Anyway, my point is that I think it's quite a bit of work to unearth the (weird, funny, counter-intuitive and probably often somewhat embarrassing) things we truly FEEL gratitude for, instead of making a goody-two-shoes list filled with all those "shoulds" that mean nothing to us, because depression makes them feel hollow and distant.
  30. 2 points

    A failure at life

    I so empathize with you allalone6...I feel like I've failed at life too (not saying that you have, just that I can relate to how you're feeling) I'm here for you if you ever want to talk (((((((Hugs))))))) Tim Tim
  31. 2 points
    I firmly believe that your story will resonnate with someone so don't worry too much about rambling! I am sometimes not the best at finding the right words, so sending you a virtual comforting hug!
  32. 2 points

    Me and My Traitorous Body

    Can you make your regular workouts (if you can, I know that can be difficult) very very light exercise until it's a habit and things improve?
  33. 2 points

    Firefox Jokes

    Hell, I just love foxes.
  34. 2 points

    Firefox Jokes

    cute. :)
  35. 2 points

    My Talents

    Carter said it all! I second everything he said! Really enjoying reading you blog posts, thanks for posting them, looking forward to more!
  36. 2 points
    Well I commend you for getting out of it! You care about yourself enough to not tolerate a sub par relationship.
  37. 2 points

    Void, self-esteem

    Personally, i'm not a fan of the language of recovery and all the bulls*** nomenclature that goes with it. Self love may just be the most loathsome, like it can be found at the pointy end of some arduous, lonely journey instead of what it really is, the reflection of everything that is given. As for Acceptance, that's just what people who have a hard time accepting anything nonetheless insist you do for yourself. It's wafty and useless. Funny how actual, real, durable acceptance never utters it's own name.
  38. 2 points

    Religion ~ Is There a God?

    Nice to know he likes you. I'm still the comic relief in his nasty comedy.
  39. 2 points

    Sweetness Doesn't Belong in Business

    It was... it is! There is no reasoning with unreasonable people. It turns out though, after speaking with HR, that when I return I will report to someone else, her husband and co-owner of the company. She herself is a co-owner of the company so there is no one above her, just equal to her, and that's her husband. So we'll see how this one goes.... hopefully he's not at all like she is!!! :/
  40. 2 points

    we need to love ourselves more

    I like how you talk about yourself in a narrative form in your blog. Makes it interesting. You should write more.
  41. 2 points

    Gins Of The Father

    Yeah so far there's been something keeping me in check. I certainly don't drink as heavily as I used to but I'm drinking pretty frequently lately, something that I haven't done before. Every 2 days or so it seems to be, sometimes a full bottle of alcohol, othertimes 3 bottles between me and a friend, and othertimes just 3 pints. It just worries me cause I always feel like I could end up getting like that if I don't watch myself. Just like how I fell into having recreational drugs everytime I went out years ago. I've since made a promise to myself never to touch drugs again (except for cigarettes) and I haven't now for about 3 years. Again, what I was doing wasn't that bad compared to some of the heaviest stuff around but it got to the point where I couldn't go clubbing without any for fear I wasn't 'myself', and I always did as much as possible in one night until I was almost passing out. There's always been something I'm 'addicted' to so I'm very wary of issues. Anyways, thanks! Glad you liked the title :P
  42. 2 points

    Im a loser

    You're definitely not a loser. You're a treasure waiting to be found.
  43. 2 points

    Another Lesson Learned

    Maybe she had some hidden reason for not responding. (Nothing to do with you).
  44. 2 points

    What Is Wrong With Me?

    I once had an internship where I was perceiving the people around me as hostile. Later I realized I didn't enjoy that kind of job, and I understood that it was my own hostility that was being reflected. Even while being cordial, speaking only when spoken to can come off as having a superiority complex. Maybe acting so defensively can create the opposite effect of what is expected. I'd try doing the opposite, taking a little bit of expansion, not confining myself to a corner, taking the initiative. It might even make work more enjoyable.
  45. 2 points

    Planning For My Departure

    It's perfectly normal to want to escape an unfulfilling life, but death is not the solution. I know it's frustrating to work hard for years to get better and not see any result. During depression we need to be surrounded by a team. It's ok to shop around for awhile for the right professionals with whom things click. I'm sorry your coworkers are so unhelpful. Loneliness can be devastating. Anyone with untreated depression suffers from this. It's difficult to be well with others when we're not well with ourself.
  46. 2 points

    Planning For My Departure

    Don't do it. There is no "sign" (from what?). You are not garbage, you deserve the best. You seem deeply in depression. It's an illness, like any others. I'd seek treatment. You probably harbor trauma from deep inside your past. The situation with your coworkers is likely a symptom, not a cause. If you tried therapy in the past and it failed, it's because you didn't meet the right therapist for you. When I met the right one, I found myself laughing of relief after each of the first sessions, having uncovered key factors that had led me to depression. I felt my anxiety decreasing, because I managed to unburden myself from bad habits and thought patterns. I understood my history finally, what kind of childhood I really had. That's how meeting the right therapist feels like. He wasn't the first one I consulted, it took me many years to find him.
  47. 2 points

    I Did Something Tough Today

    good for you, I hate freeloader. you did good
  48. 2 points
    Lady Mozzer

    The Noise Inside

    Thank you Nataya.Your very kind words help. :) (((Nataya)))
  49. 2 points


    me too. I'm in total I don't want to be here anymore mode. sorry about your fine - I agree you should have had a warning.
  50. 2 points

    Finally Quit Trying....

    I think it is very difficult for one to continue forward if we don't let go of our past. Sometimes the thoughts of the beautiful past hold us back, because we hate the change that occurred. Acceptance. Last night I read that some people have maladaptive attitude. I think I am one of those, but thank you for everything you write. By giving me the chance to respond I realize some of my own issues. That is why I love this place. Since I came my view of life did expanded and I am grateful. If you wish to try some CBT look for a site called the mood gym. I believe it is free. I know some people find it even more useful than (talk) therapy.
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