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Showing content with the highest reputation on 04/22/2021 in all areas

  1. Thanks NJ. I'm limiting time on several things that are not helping. Doesn't mean I'm disappearing though. I know I have some friends here and that's good. I just need to find a way to not just use this site to comisserate and complain about depression. There has to be a better answer. I'm tired of the one I've been using the past several years. I got some very hard reminders of what's important several times the past couple of years. The one that keeps coming back simply comes down to this. Get on with living or get on with dying, but stop sitting in limbo. I may not unfuk my brain but I have to get up and unstuck myself.
    3 points
  2. Free education and training packs. Download them to your PC. Mostly lecture stuff in video format with lecture screens in PDF format. Some have labs and the software they help with can be found for free also. At least what I'm looking at. Only very product specific stuff for big ticket hardware and software is at cost and that cost is ridiculous. The training courses for free are decent and cover the whole gammit of things out there so they are worth looking into. There is FreeCourseWeb, Udemy, Lynda (30 days free). Many of those course can also be found on bittorrent sites for free. Many colleges now offer quite a few free courses. In my case I'm looking at some of the "Cloud" training and associated tests. I have more complete courses, exam prep material, and mock exams, than I can do the rest of the year. I've been collecting them for a while. Now it's time to start them. If anyone needs help finding any kind of training stuff let me know and I'll help out.
    3 points
  3. I’m so sorry to hear that your feeling down and out, I hope your feeling better real soon! And remember you always have caring friends here to lend you a helping hand!
    3 points
  4. I need to buy a bike too. Tomorrow I´m going to the woods, last time I was there my anxiety disappeared.
    2 points
  5. Glad you are feeling better
    2 points
  6. Slept from 7 to 11 pm, been up all night... it's 4 am I don't know whether I have anxiety or something wrong with my heart. Went for a bike ride in the woods. Darkness is comforting, though. Basically I feel anxious... not too bad, but it's not good enough.
    2 points
  7. I have no illusions about love. It's either desire or obsession I have - even though I don't do anything out of the ordinary. I haven't talked to that person properly for decades. An oopsie happened in my brain and I fell in love way back then; I have a terrible religious upbringing which also contributed to basically emotional destruction - loathesome. Loathesome. Abhorrent ignoring of my mental issues by my parents when I was a teen. Now I finally plucked up every ounce of courage I had and basically "crashed through the door" in a manner of speaking by blathering out all in a vague confession in some text messages. Not sure it did a lot of good, rather it makes me feel terror. I am terrified by the only person I truly miss in this damn world. This is not right, but I feel less fear when I'm threatened with violence than talking about these feelings. I am so ashamed and I hate myself so much.
    1 point
  8. No need to be rich per se, just self-sufficient (or financially independent). Still, the problem is that we always need something from someone, whether it be food, clothing, Internet, medical help, car repair, etc. It's pretty much impossible to be truly self-sufficient nowadays, and it doesn't sound like much fun to be so anyway...
    1 point
  9. When mini lion goes out into the garden she sits on a chair like a human She copies everything I do. Awww
    1 point
  10. The way the human mind works is we tend to focus on bad things sometimes. For example if you drive somewhere you will most likely be bothered by a crazy driving car than notice all the other cars that drive good. There are a lot of nice people out there but first you must overcome yourself. You will lose a lot of energy because you are fighting yourself because you are equally matched with yourself. You can try positive self talk and think like a champion.
    1 point
  11. It doesn't sound like an "oopsie" to me at all. You like someone and you confessed to them. It might not had the outcome you were hoping for but still you did NOTHING wrong! Rejection sucks. Feels awful. But it takes a lot to be able to tell someone we have feelings for them. So I think it was brave of you for doing that. Im sorry your parents didnt show you the understanding you needed when you were young I know how that feels . im in my mid twenties and the older I get the more I feel like my childhood traumas weigh me down. I hope that you can soon learn to have more compassion for yourself and have that some love you had for that person and show some of that to yourself. as corny and cliche as it sounds I do think that sometimes the love we need the most is from ourselves.
    1 point
  12. Yes I think it was Covid. The rash is starting to fade. I'm starting to feel better. This was the most nasty vicious thing I've ever had.
    1 point
  13. Well, so far today I had a burst of energy this morning and got a couple of chores done. Now, I'm having a cuppa and feeling a bit anxious I have to take a shower in a minute and then head out for mini lion supplies. I don't feel good about the fact that I'm spending more time looking after the house and garden at the moment than I am taking care of myself. Perhaps that is normal these days
    1 point
  14. Today I gave the bathroom a really good cleaning. Currently working on some laundry.
    1 point
  15. Honestly I feel like telling you , don’t attend therapy with him, go to therapy by yourself, find strength in yourself before letting anyone else in, regardless of whether he is your husband, mum, dad, whatever. X
    1 point
  16. Rach4masaya

    Trouble sleeping

    I am so sorry your mom gas passed. My mom died when I was 17. I still miss her everyday. I keep her picture by my bed. I often think about how I would like to talk to her or what life might be like if she was here. She treated me good as well and was kind. I wish I had her to talk to. I wish I could tell her how feel. I’m sorry for your loss. She must think the world of you and think of you like you think of her. Thanks for sharing that dream. I’m glad you had a sweet mom too.
    1 point
  17. oh my goodness - that's exactly what I was worried about regarding our own therapy! He had had a small side flirtation going on the side, and I knew he would manipulate our therapist, which he did!
    1 point
  18. It happens sometimes and it is very nice of you to give her a present for her professionalism
    1 point
  19. We are only human:)
    1 point
  20. I feel like a windshield wiper, when rain comes in your life just wipe it away so that you can see
    1 point
  21. Floor2017

    Sad, hazy and fearful

    Wow, I hate to hear that things have been very difficult for you. It seems that you have been trying to find a job but nothing had open up for you. I suggest you keep on trying and look at it from a different perspective. See yourself doing the kind of work that you enjoy and start developing happier thoughts that can help your overall mood. Because there is one thing that you can control and that is how you feel about yourself. Never, beat yourself down because there might not be anyone there to help you get back up. Stay positive and good things can come to you. Be blessed my friend
    1 point
  22. Hey 2deep. I'm glad you're finding other outlets to be a positive thing for you.... It doesn't matter if you dip in and out a bit here. I don't think anyone's gonna judge. You do have friends here and we ain't gonna forget you that easily, if at all People tend to remember who stood by them when the chips were down
    1 point
  23. APFSDS

    Exercise! #2

    Resting my feet for the challenge. I'm almost thinking I should go for 50 km. I could do it and it will make my feet into tomato-parmesan ... but it could also be worth it. Worst thing about it is my feet are busted and the rules include paved roads. Cheese grater here I come!
    1 point
  24. sober4life

    Work Thread

    I'll be honest I've never heard anyone in real life say I'm a people person. I think it's just something people say on tv.
    1 point
  25. I need a hero

    Work Thread

    Guys! I just took a HUGE step forward. I finally deleted the voicemail of me being placed on suspension for a mistake! I used to play it every once in a while and I used to do it for no other reason other than to remind myself of a mistake that DOES NOT define me! It feels so up lifting to do it!
    1 point
  26. feeling numb and unmotivated. really tempted to spend the day in a dark room watching TV. my husband is having an off day due to very poor sleep. I'm finding myself slightly more sensitive but able to control my reactions a lot better bc i'm also kinda numb. It's easier to just be like, whatever I'll just do "something else". That something else is usually sitting for hours on end hopping in and out of reality. My brain is very drawn to rumination right now. I have to catch myself and then try really hard to pull away. Keeps me frozen in my seat.
    0 points
  27. I do have an idea even though I was never tested because I'm so afraid of everyone. Whatever I have gone through so far has been the worst stretch of 13 days of my life. I think the rash is starting to fade but I'll be honest I'm almost afraid to say that. What else will happen? I told everyone I came in contact with over the phone and so far nobody else has gotten sick. I've been hiding here ever since.
    0 points
  28. Thank you I'm trying with everything in me to get better. I have to be better by Friday because that's the day family will show up the day after 14 days since I started getting sick. If I'm not better than this on Friday I'll be waving goodbye to this place.
    0 points
  29. I feel very scared and very hopeless.
    0 points
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