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Showing content with the highest reputation on 08/16/2018 in all areas

  1. 2 points
    JessiesMom

    With depression and axiety

    It depends on how severe your depression and anxiety are - I think of meds as a way to put symptoms into abayance - so that issues can be worked through - but this is not true for all people. And there may be issues that can never be healed from - meds can make them easier to live with. I know two people who suffer from bi-polar disorder. One has been able to wean himself off his medication and is living farily well. He does not have a regular job and is able to adjust his life to the rythems of his disorder. The other went off his medication and went off the deep end. It is tricky - and you will never know what the result will be until it is too late. This is probably a conversation best had with your prescribing doctor and a therapist. However, it is not a good idea to just go cold turkey no matter what.
  2. 2 points
    @sober4life I know what you mean. I have been in this prison for a long time now. folsom prison blues by Johnny Cash perfectly describes how I feel
  3. 2 points
    I so feel for you. Living with depression is very draining. When I feel like that, I do extra things to take good care of myself like go to bed early, get a special coffee, read, leave the chores undone, take a nap, eat a protein bar for dinner. Good self-care can help us so much. Keep posting, Floor! People read your posts. They may be just not sure how to respond. We need all the positivity we can get. 🙂
  4. 2 points
    sober4life

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    I walk right after sunrise when it's in the 60s. Sometimes it's still dark and I'm walking around the cemetery track. The perfect mornings are when it's still dark and foggy. I like making my neighbors think I'm as strange as possible. I agree though. My favorite months to walk are October and November.
  5. 2 points
    BeyondWeary

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    No, I think it will get better. We change as we grow older - more wisdom, different priorities, maybe a need for a Higher Power, more experience in dealing with this illness. I have the hope of a better life to come after this one because of my faith in God. If I'm wrong, I don't really lose anything. Yet if others who don't believe in God (a relationship not religion) are wrong, I think they have more to lose.
  6. 2 points
    ViceCityKitty, I hope things have gotten better for you since your last post. I wasn't sure how to respond to it and I'm still not sure. I used to have a friend who was a Jehovah's Witness. I lost touch with her but it was interesting to learn about religion from a different perspective. I don't know if this will make you feel any better but I think that it's important to have friends from different backgrounds. I know what it's like to feel like you don't have approval from your parents and the hurt that can cause. I'm 37 years old and their opinion still means more to me than anybody else's. The only thing I've learned is that we can't always make them happy. We have to do what makes us happy as long as it's not harming us or someone else, we shouldn't worry. We always will though unless we're lucky enough to be completely 100% independent. I only know two people like that my sister and this friend of mine that came to this country when she was 25 and almost never goes back to her home. Even my brother is not 100%...he won't take my mother and father's money but he often seeks their advice for raising his kids and we babysit them a lot. (It's wonderful when I'm healthy...I hope they never see me really ill...). My mom is going on a trip with them and he said he didn't think I should go. I wasn't ready to go on such a massive trip anyway but it still kinda hurt. I guess I give him too many mental health updates for him to be confident in me in that department even though I am better than anyone else in playing with those kids. I can play for hours without getting tired as long as I'm not running constantly. All I just got back from a really nice trip but the last night was horrible. I only got five hours of sleep and the night before the last night I was one hour short of what I needed. I had to fake good health with my mom yesterday and it was so hard. I think I need a week to recover. But something happened that I want to share with you guys. Have you ever wanted to be with someone just because you loved their family? Well, my mom was married to someone like that once and he turned out to be a bad guy. I just met my best friend's son (my best friend is older than me...old enough to be my dad...it's weird I know). He was 31 years old and I was so relieved because I didn't like him. He told a really inappropriate story and it was like thank God I don't like him...but it was a little hard to sleep after I met him because I gave him the cliff notes version of my personality and how I never want to settle for the wrong guy. My weight makes me more self conscious than I used to be and he said I was beautiful. Now, guys, I know that's nothing but to me it was everything. No guy outside my family has said that to me for a very long time. I am so glad I can share this with you because I still don't have a new doctor and therapist yet and I'm getting stressed about that. I think I have enough meds to hold me over and my parents can take me to a doctor in an emergency but I'm still stressed. I could write pages on this site but I will quit for now. I hope everyone is doing okay.
  7. 2 points
    This has been happening more this month, but particularly struck me this morning. When I woke up, opened my eyes to a black kitty's face blissfully asleep just a few inches from mine. I'd almost swear there was a smile on those tiny kitty lips. I'll add this is a step up from his usual habit of resting warm, happy paw(s) on inconvenient places like my mouth, nose (either nostril) and eyes.
  8. 1 point
    My therapist and I have deduced that my gender issues are caused by my depression. This is because that my gender issues always only come after I’ve become depressed. In recent times my depression has been unpredictable as it comes one day and leaves the next, or even only stays for a few hours. Right now I’m outside a movie my family dragged me to because my depression was being taunted by one of the protagonists attractive self. I had to leave the theater. Honestly I don’t know what to do. Sometimes I wish I was born a girl for some reason. I know that if I were to transition it could never be the same as if I was born a girl. What really scares me is that this isn’t a constant thing. When I’m not depressed and my moods are fine I have no gripes whatsoever with my gender. I have a theory that my gender discontentment comes from a place of feeling unwanted, and I want to get the attention attractive women get. I don’t know. It makes me want to cease living sometimes. I just want whatever encouraging words or advice you can offer me. I need help.
  9. 1 point
    Scias

    Hey everyone, new member here

    I've been suffering from chronic depression since I was 15-16, I'm 28 now and it hasn't gotten much better. It's not an everyday thing but it always sneaks up on me every now and then; feelings of hopelessness, anxiety, self-loathing, fear of never being loved etc. I live with my family and work a barely above min wage job. I'm very sensitive and have issues with coping with rejection, I've never had many friends in my life and have always felt like a loner for the most part. At first it wasn't quite that way, but from middle school-high school onward I definitely was. I have no friends now outside of people I met online now. These feelings have always been there but I think it got worse after a rejection from someone I had a huge crush on at work. I tried online dating after that fell apart and I had no luck on there either. Over the last few years, all of these feelings soon started to turn into fits of pessimism, anger, resentment etc. All of my peers from school are married, bought a house, went to college and ended up with a good job etc, while I have next to nothing. It's gotten worse since now I'm close to 30; at 30 with little life experience and no relationship experience as well makes for a highly undesirable person. I can't afford therapy and I tried medication for a little bit but it did me no good. I've always been introverted and have a hard time forming lasting friendships that lead to anything. I've become weary and untrusting of others. I've had a difficult time forming new friendships online as well, I'm hoping this will be a more rewarding experience since this is a community that would understand and not judge my feelings, especially my negative ones. Thanks. Nice to meet everyone! I have a hard time really typing my feelings out without going into tangents or ranting so I tried my best here.
  10. 1 point
    JD4010

    I hate summer

    Most people love summer. All of that wonderful outdoor recreation! And they look good doing it, too! Summer is nothing but misery for me. It means itching (from bug bites and foot fungus) and sweat. Constantly. I don't look good at all in summer attire either. I can't wait for all of this heat and humidity to blow out of here so I can finally get outside and do things (while listening to others gripe about how "cold" it is).
  11. 1 point
    That's cool, Hopeless. I am glad they inspire creativity.
  12. 1 point
    Oscar K

    With depression and axiety

    I can't comment on meds since I never used them however I'm a big believer in what I like to call MEDaphors. Depression and anxiety play awful tricks to our fragile yet resilient psyches. My approach is to play a few tough, clever tricks right back to Old Man Depression. Anyone reading my posts over the past few years will see how I invoke a cave metaphor for depression. It's been quite helpful to me and occasionally to others. I constantly need to remind myself that depression can be a natural resource. I know it sounds a bit crazy but everything in this world is more than a bit crazy. Anyway this forum has helped me so much and I'm very thankful for the insights.
  13. 1 point
    lonelyforeigner

    With depression and axiety

    You can learn to manage anxiety without meds. It's not easy but doable... With depression it kinda depends on the underlying cause. If you've been depressed for a long time and it's not just the occasional episode it's obviously a lot harder. Many people do manage to get it under control with just therapy though so there is hope. If your depression is not at all circumstantial or related to your past then the underlying issue might be a chemical imbalance which like high blood pressure will require ongoing medication.
  14. 1 point
    @sober4life Sometimes I wish I could own a gun so that I could end it quick and painlessly. I won’t obviously, but still. When I’m a 80 year old depressed man then I might do it. My maternal grandfather who meant a lot to me never complained, he worked hard all his life. Then came a day when he had enough.
  15. 1 point
    It’s not about being lonely. It’s about having no one that understands you, that kind of lonely. When you feel stuck in your own little world.
  16. 1 point
    ladysmurf

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    I really don't know what the point is ...everyone has their own theory......but after so many years, I can honestly say that I wish I had not been born because I'm suffering and this is not the way I imagined life, nor do I think its fair that people suffer the way we do. But I try not to question it, otherwise it just drives me insane. Some people are just lucky, and others aren't. I guess it's just all random. I mean if we lived in a perfect world where no one got sick, k*lled, robbed, in fights, some are rich, others starving to death....so many people like doctors, cops, lawyers, businesses, etc would be out of job...so I suppose my only explanation is that some people are lucky and others aren't so lucky, and sh*t happens whether we like it or not.
  17. 1 point
    BeyondWeary

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    I don't want to be at work anymore but I need to be. Thank God it is slow today and I can be on this site. How come life is so hard? What is the point? to just get through it the best I can? wish things were better than that
  18. 1 point
    Just had some chicken soup. Wasn’t as good as I remembered it to be. Food isn’t very enjoying when you’re in my mood.
  19. 1 point
    @JD4010 Everytimr I hear Johnny sing I can feel his pain. I have been to similar things. I love his music. It speaks to me on a personal level. If there is one person I want to meet in heaven then it’s Johnny Cash. Folsom prison Blues explains my experience with school and life as a whole.
  20. 1 point
    Ever had one of those days when you wish you felt sick, or had a broken arm so you could have a legit reason to not go to work? Not because you want to stay home and goof off, but because you're just having a hard time 'adulting' that day? Yeah, that's today for me. I'm having trouble adulting today. I feel like a car with a faulty tie-rod end - the next bump or pothole could send my tire flying off into the blue yonder & leave me stranded. I really need to stop, put the car up, and fix it, replace that tie-rod end before it goes. So why don't I?
  21. 1 point
    ladysmurf

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    Yes we do change, but for those of us who have been dealing with this since we were young kids, not being able to work, or live a productive life ..I don't believe a higher power will help me out. if such a thing existed I doubt after so many years I'd still be dealing with this. But to each his own. I don't like arguing over religion on this matter. I respect peoples beliefs, it's just not mine...if it works for you and others good..its not my thing...
  22. 1 point
    @sober4life Hank williams is great as well. I’m so lonesome I could cry is such a great song. I have always felt a connection to Johnny cash. Sometimes I can hear him talk to me, it’s probably my unstable mind, but stil. I love his music. I have listened to his first 4 albums.
  23. 1 point
    samadhiSheol

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    Nice one riv! 😀
  24. 1 point
    HuronZephyr

    Could I be Depressed?

    I saw my doctor today and told him about the problems I've been having, including problems at work. He filled out a 'fitness for work' form that only requires identification of limitations/restrictions and not a diagnosis, as my employer will need to accommodate me, not for depression, but because of problems I have with focus, concentration and ability to do detailed work. All of which could be caused by the depression. He has prescribed Wellbutrin to see if it helps with my ADD and with my depression.
  25. 1 point
    bellerose

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    Been in a good place. I am feeling more confident that my life is going in the right direction. it's not perfect, not quite where i want it to be, but it's getting there. So many of my worries and fears have been hushed for now so i am taking advantage of it. i have been eating better. I am now 10 lbs. lighter than when i was at my heaviest. I am smoking tobacco only 3 days a week. I am exercising at least once a week. i am working on my crafts. things feel real nice. I like it.
  26. 1 point
    I think you are right. When I'm really depressed, I don't like myself or my life much at all. So I think it is natural to want to be someone else, thinking that it would be so much better. Yet I think that is an illusion but hard to see. Like it is greener on the other side, but it is really not. We take ourselves with us wherever we go or whoever we are.
  27. 1 point
    Sentinel2

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    Feeling better today, did some things during the day and did a good training also. Knowing bad days will come, i cherish the minutes that i am not suicidal.
  28. 1 point
    @sober4life I like walking all alone. I don’t like walking where there is lots of people. Every time I see someone I have this thought in the back of my mind of how hated I am. Everything about me makes me an outsider and we all know that people like outsiders, especially the elderly. I’m so sick of them pushing me around where I live, just because you’re old doesn’t mean that you can act like a ****.
  29. 1 point
    @JD4010 I sweat so much that sweat falls down my forehead. It got so bad today that I made a pool of sweat, that sentence doesn’t sound very good, oh well.
  30. 1 point
    JD4010

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    I can't wait for it to get cooler outside so I feel like walking again. I've been out a few times during this hot summer. I've had to carry a towel because I sweat so much. Heck, I sweat when it's 40 degrees (F) but at least it's not so horribly uncomfortable for me at that temp.
  31. 1 point
    ladysmurf

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    do you really think nothing will ever get better for us??
  32. 1 point
    @ladysmurf Yeah, I get you. I was stuck in bed until around 12 AM or so, it’s sick to be honest! I can’t get out of bed. It’s like there are invincible chains holding me back. It’s hard to explain.
  33. 1 point
    ladysmurf

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    Sometimes I do, and sometimes I don't ...it all depends how I wake up. Sometimes I go for a walk and it helps a bit, and other times I wont bother getting out of bed, because whats the point? Plus I don't always have the energy to walk or exercise ...
  34. 1 point
    @BeyondWeary I don’t feel better when I walk, so I don’t get the point really. I just keep it to keep my mind occupied, it’s still painful though. I know, I barely have the motivation to get up on the mornings.
  35. 1 point
    BeyondWeary

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    That's great that you can walk that much even when you are stressed. I need to get some exercise but have no motivation.🙁
  36. 1 point
    I've had a therapist for over two years and it sometimes does help but not that much. I work in a small company too which kind of a downside because most of my colleagues expect me to always interact but I'm so depressed and introverted. It make me stick out.
  37. 1 point
    velvetpuddles

    What Are You Eating? #2

    Peach pie with vanilla ice cream. The breakfast of champions.
  38. 1 point
    Well my friend you are in a bad situation. She should pay you for your services because she can not do what she does without the things you are doing for her. Be wise since she want pay you, perhaps you can use her card to buy things that will turn into cash later if she leaves you. That you can sell perhaps in the near future for money.
  39. 1 point
    First, I want to tell you that you are not a loser. You have children who are completely dependent on you and they need you to be strong. It's normal to feel that you cannot live wihtout this man, but you also do not deserve to be treated as such. I am sorry that the hotline was no help. If you are interested, I know a number you can call and talk to someone (free) and they can direct you to more resources to help your situation. PM me if you are interested. I am praying for you. Take care.
  40. 1 point
    SpiralingMind

    What Really Bugs You (7)

    When the Powers That Be move the place you vote to a location 1.7 miles from the nearest bus stop.
  41. 1 point
    20YearsandCounting

    Long D*mn Day

    It's gonna be a long d*mn day today. Today is my late day, I won't get home until after 7pm. I really need to remind myself I"m lucky. I need to count my blessings; for me, it helps. There is such a tendency to only see the negative, it's not deliberate, but it slips in when I'm not careful. I feel like I'm teetering on an edge again; walking a tightrope no one else can see. Last week was a little tough, but I"m lucky I was only subject to the by=blows of events, and not the actual focus of them. It makes me nervous, though; I wonder when it will be my turn to be the focus. But I cannot think like that, I just can't. I can't let that monster out of the bag. It serves no purpose except to trigger me; it doesn't help me prepare. I know this is a little dark for my Cas & Misha blog, but I missed posting Misha yesterday. I have to say I love Jared Padelecki's Sam Winchester, but for different reasons. Something about him reminds me of my son; sort of a gentle, quiet, intelligent, capable giant. Sometimes, I feel like this one below when stuff happens; I just sort of pray this to God sometimes, forgive me, LOL. I have to laugh at some point or I'll go nutter. I really do wonder at God sometimes. His def of good and mine seem to be slightly different.
  42. 1 point
    RiverLight

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    I passed my analytics exam!!!!!!! 97%! WOOOHOOOOOO! I got 2/70 wrong, not bad!
  43. 1 point
    justthinking

    Could I be Depressed?

    Have you reached out to anyone for help? Or looked into any resources?
  44. 1 point
    I agree with this completely. I'm usually completely embarrassed by my art and writing. But I'm trying to show it all anyway and figure out how to get some confidence and pride in myself, haha. Lovely painting, though! I really like it!
  45. 1 point
    20YearsandCounting

    What Are You Reading?

    Two different authors for me, both well done. Solomon Bull by Clayton Lindemuth; main character is Native American, cross country runner, independent stock trader, savvy hacker, and a bit of a counter-culture person. I enjoyed seeing things from his POV. 😎 The Gauguin Connection by Estelle Ryan; main character is on the Autism spectrum, and has turned her intense powers of observation into a career (think 'Lie to Me' cable series). There is a hint of romance towards the end of the book, but it is very subtle, and viewed within the framework of the main character's understanding. 😎
  46. 1 point
    I held a little baby and it stopped crying and smiled up at me 😁
  47. 1 point
    Camellia, I'm beginning to believe that my posts are to positive for some people, because I get very few replies. I want to thank you for responding to my post. I'm not trying to make anybody feel bad, it is just the opposite, if God can give me the strength to get up everyday and FIGHT for what is rightfully mine, I'm just saying you too can fight for what is rightfully yours.
  48. 1 point
    Work out at home. I got out of my (largely dysfunctional) head for a bit.
  49. 1 point
    hocico

    What's On Your Mind Right Now? (2)

    hmm what's this "Sir Patrick Stewart will be reprising the role of Jean-Luc Picard in a new series of Star Trek" finally the best captain has returned to the bridge 😮 😁😄🙀🕺set phasers to stun.
  50. 1 point
    Hi everyone! I didn't visit this board for quite some time, I thought I wanted to say Hi today to everybody, irregardless of wherever you come from! Last year July, I was heartbroken and feel terribly sad as my CO just had a new lady in his life. I've been loving my CO for two years now since 2016. That point of my life is the hardest as like fighting with a ghost, fighting with my own self. Where no one can see or understand what I'm going through. But I'm silently hurt, depressed and feeling troubled. I don't know how on Earth I can love someone that I never met, probably would never met at all, someone that is unreachable and didn't know that I'm exist, but I did. God given him power to almost destroy me and I tried to stay away from it. I totally deleted everything about him on my phone and didn't check on him online, including blocking his social media. It was hard, I missed him a lot. About 3-4 months after that, I came back to checking him online. I can't resist sometimes and the needs to see how he's doing is unbearable. From one day to another, I became more and more comfortable coming back to the CO fandom as he wasn't seen with his girlfriend. Add on, he had a new movie came out that time so I feel like, I need to watch that no matter what happened, I just don't care. The girlfriend remains invisible until I found out they had broken up earlier this year. So, as he's single again, I'm 110% back to the CO Mode especially now as he's busy promoting his latest film that will come out errr tomorrow? Hahahaha. This week, I got a lot of videos, pictures and news about him. I'm enjoying it but there's also discomfort in there. I found myself to be stuck in the CO bubble for the whole day, checking his updates in between works, and lose focus while I'm in office. Add on to that problem, my job scope in office has become lesser now, so I gets to daydreaming a lot. I think this is not good. For the past two years, I can concentrate on work just fine cause I'm super busy, but now I can't. My days become less productive. So I decided to be less attached to the CO effective from today. I'm planning to only checking him online during weekend, after that, maybe a month or never at all (if I could make it). I desire to be free from this. Please wish me luck guys xx
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