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Showing content with the highest reputation on 08/01/2018 in all areas

  1. 5 points
    JD4010

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    That I will do. In fact, I was late to work because the kitties were being so friendly. I "had" to play with them! They are a couple of clowns. They, and my daughter, are the only reasons I keep subjecting myself to the hell that is my job.
  2. 3 points
    Feeling weirdly, I don't know...stoic? Nonchalant? Not in a bad way, just middle-of-the-road emotionally. My days have been pleasantly bland, so nothing's been flapping me one way or the other. I'm feeling...unflapped. I haven't even felt much anxiety recently. Little bits here and there. But as I read through the fine discussion above this, I feel like mentioning that anxiety has always been the burden on my back since at least the beginning of school. I was a terrified, anxious little girl. Depression came later, in middle school or so, I think fueled by years and years of chronic anxiety. What I'm feeling now is completely foreign to me.
  3. 3 points
    salparadise6132

    How Do You Feel Right Now #6

    Me too. A new pain every day arising out of the blue. It's like Bits and Bites - each handful, a whole new ballgame! (Apologies to all those in countries that don't sell Bits and Bites LOL!!!!
  4. 3 points
    salparadise6132

    How Do You Feel Right Now #6

    He's a dips***!
  5. 2 points
    Natasha1

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    Starting new thread. Last posts: WolfLady 4 I am at work and just want to scream. The boss is there talking with is beloved employees that always rub is back. I am not a back rubber so... Here I am listening to their nonsense. sober4life 9,679 It's one of those days where I'm completely brain dead but I have to be out all day anyway. Wouldn't it be nice to be able to say I need a break from everything and then just be able to do it. The stressful days never end. It's one right after the other until I break over and over again.
  6. 2 points
    @JD4010 Kitty playtime is crucial for me...and him. Even when I'm not in the mood, like you, I usually can't help myself. This is gonna sound weird, but when I feel I've got other "important" things to do and he wants to monopolize my time, I've usually made a conscious decision that cat business is more important. That often means Spot remains blissfully planted on my chest or in my lap. It means he'll be making muffins on me for 8-10 or even 15 minutes...even though I might have to pee. From one cat daddy to another, you're doin' good. An aside that, although those li'l claws get trimmed regularly - he's really good about it, particularly for a street kitty - playtime can mean some scars. More than one therapist has expressed...er...concern about those on my inner arm. Kitty is nine years old, but often reverts nine weeks old. Legs make a great moving target.
  7. 2 points
    Natasha1

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    Can you play with your cats?
  8. 2 points
    @JD4010 Same! It feels like I’m watching a movie or something. I’m just on autopilot until I realize that it’s late and that I have been just laying on the sofa for hours.
  9. 2 points
    Good luck Rose, I agree and very well said "a cross I have never had an interest in bearing..."
  10. 2 points
    I know. It’s my low self esteem combined with my depression.y psychiatrist is also going to be gone for 3 weeks. I’ll have to use the internet again. Dancing around definetely helps. Thanks for your comment by the way!
  11. 2 points
    Natasha1

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    Guess what? You are not trash. It is hard to see that in ourselves i know. The great thing is if the last 2 weeks have been horrible, you can only go up from here. Shania Twains song Up is in my mind now lol. Try putting it on and dancing silly around your home.
  12. 2 points
    Natasha1

    How Do You Feel Right Now #6

    New thread: https://www.depressionforums.org/forums/topic/154735-how-do-you-feel-right-now-7/
  13. 2 points
    TopekaK

    How Do You Feel Right Now #6

    Doing fine I guess. My doctor bumped up my prozac. We'll see how that goes.I just wish I had a reason to wake up in the morning.
  14. 2 points
    sober4life

    How Do You Feel Right Now #6

    I would make a smart ass comment to him like if things are so out of control here maybe you shouldn't have taken a week vacation. Maybe you should have done some work for a change.
  15. 1 point
    Rose Chavez

    PTSD CAN BE SUCH A CREEP!!!

    There are times where I actually feel like I have things under my control. Gerald (my ADHD) and my disorganized brain work together to accomplish the day in a methodical manor. My disabled body feels pain but, I can fight through it and use it to encourage my inner strength. However that adorable little a****** trauma always seems to show up. A simple phone call with my attorney that creates such a hopeful situation is somehow twisted into instant triggers. I hear my ex husbands cruel words, feel his hands around my neck choking me, see his disgusting face and I'm checked out. I am going down the rabbit hole and fast. I retreat into myself, become unusually quiet and am no longer able to focus. I have learned to apply my coping mechanisms, but I resent them too. When I am traveling that path of the trigger I know it is time to shut down. Earphones in, Bill Burr podcast,covers over me, deep breathing, shaking and rocking,,,I pass out, It is strange to do it sober, but a huge sense of pride when I wake up. This all seems so unfair, a cross I have never had an interest in bearing, but it is happening. Just another reason to be strong, acknowledge my afflictions, and be proud of myself for having made it out alive and well. My child still has her mother. His first wife unfortunately not so lucky. I survived and still am. I am awake, handling my business, smiling over my coffee and ready for whatever today throws at me. I know my limitations though. Today I stay home, go nowhere, keep my inside in control so that tomorrow I can make it to the specialist to keep working towards fixing my outsides. Wish me luck, everyday is a battle...."BASTOGNE"!!!
  16. 1 point
    I am 43, married for 17 years, and I think I am going through a midlife crisis and the menopausal change years. My marriage has been turbulent in the past but has gotten a lot better in recent years. We have no children. Overall we have a good life. I have been hit with a massive wave of nostalgia for the one person I loved before I met my husband. It was unrequited love, we were never in a relationship together, and I have not had any contact with him in at least 13 years. I have thought about him now and then over the years, particularly on his birthday, even though I am confident that it is probably a very good thing that I did not end up being with him. However, I feel that we did not end contact on very good terms, so many things left unsaid. This wave of emotions and longing I'm experiencing started with a brief but very nice and vivid dream about him and I now find myself gradually remembering details about the visits with him. My mind is full of "shoulda, coulda, woulda" thoughts, and I find myself hoping that with the insight I have now, that I made the most out of every moment with him back then. Since the beginning of our marriage my husband has known about this element of my past. I've read that this renewed sense of longing is common and I'm looking to hear from folks who are going through or have gone through the same thing.
  17. 1 point
    Leandra

    HI and Intro

    Hello everyone. I am new to this forum but not to depression and antidepressants. Even as a child I had issues but that is taboo in my family. Emotional or mental issues meant you were weak so you just sucked it up and kept going. As a child I had palilalia, severe anxiety and social interaction issues. In our time, it was just "being shy". As I grew older, I started showing signs of OCD (that poor stove) and hypochondria. I learned to deal with it until I had my daughter and after finally convincing my family doctor something was wrong, he started me on my laundry list of tried and failed SSRI's. Serzone, Zoloft, Celexa, Prozac, and other's I have lost names of. As I got older, my doctor decided to add benzos to it. This triggered bad reactions. I started drinking, and also cutting my arms up. Since I take care of my 2 disabled parents, plus working in a call center where pure hatred is spewed at you all day, it takes a toll on my emotions. As my dad starts shows different personality changes as he ages, I worry that I will wind up like him and be a burden on my daughter. So now I'm on Wellbutrin, which since it is new, I'm enjoying the buzz but waiting for the honeymoon phase to end and see how it affects me. I am enjoying not "feeling" right now. It's amazing to not have every emotion amplified to the point it is painful to breathe.
  18. 1 point
    JD4010

    Ruby

    @20YearsandCounting has been featuring the actor Misha Collins, who plays Castiel on the TV series Supernatural, in her blog posts. I like the Castiel character in the show a lot, but he's not my type. 😀 I thought to myself, "hey, why not post some of my favorite actresses in some posts?" Now your gonna get it. The actress' name is Genevieve Cortese.
  19. 1 point
    June322

    Hello from new member

    Hi! Welcome to the forums! Feel free to vent here all you want and ask any questions that you think perhaps one of us can help with. No one here is a professional and were all here struggling with our own demons but thats what makes this place great as we can all relate to each other one way or another. Some people have also been through this stuff for years and have gained some helpful tips on how to cope with the struggles. So feel free to share your stories and maybe someone here can help! I look forwards to your posts and best wishes to you and your wife! 🙂
  20. 1 point
    JD4010

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    Milwaukee? I think I know what you are saying here...one of the things that Milwaukee is famous for...? @MarkintheDark Gosh yes, kitty time takes precedence over everything else. One of my cats has great "claw manners", but her sister does not. I'm looking at my arms right now and some punctures and deep scratches. I'm singing along with Ted Nugent. But I don't care! These two kitties are my family life now.
  21. 1 point
    Epictetus

    PTSD CAN BE SUCH A CREEP!!!

    I also want to wish you luck, Rose. You have been through so much and are still enduring so much. You are an inspiration to all of us!!! - epictetus
  22. 1 point
    MarkintheDark

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    I feel zombie-like, numb. Yesterday's yard care marathon indeed wiped me out and I'm on automatic today, which may not be a bad thing. Feel like I'll do today what I need to do, but I'm like one of Dr. Who's cybermen. Here's proof. Apparently, I've been disconnected from my week. Received a call this morning that my dentist needed to change my appointment for tomorrow...and appointment I'd completely forgotten about, although it's sitting right there on my calendar staring at me. Sheesh.
  23. 1 point
    Kogent5

    What's On Your Mind Right Now? (2)

    I don't know how people live independently without feeling intense anxiety over every decision they make. I don't know how people make major decisions without being absolutely crippled with anxiety. I especially don't know how people do this when they live alone.
  24. 1 point
    sober4life

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    I feel like taking a trip to Milwaukee and never coming back because there is no real hope in my life. I will stick with my sobriety but I'm holding on by a thread. I need to see real hope soon!
  25. 1 point
    @JD4010 Family issues are the worst. I have a narcissistic father and my mother doesn’t really care about me. I wanted to **** my self every day when a I was with my father, I would have done it if I knew an easy and painful method. Same! I was always the weird kid. I never tried to fit in or follow trends, I was just myself and lots of people hated me for that. I was very sensitive though, one mean comment would make me cry and still does to this day.
  26. 1 point
    JD4010

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    I'm feeling........nothing. Maximum anhedonia. I have no motivation to do anything. Stuff at work just keeps getting worse and worse. I've been burning out anyway, but with some big problems looming on the horizon, I've bottomed out. I just don't care. "Three months to thirty". I can't afford to retire but honestly, I never will be able to.
  27. 1 point
    @Natasha1 I think i was born with it genetically. It didn’t start though to affect me until I entered sixth grade. My father pressured me to perform well and pressured me about getting good grades and all that. He abused me mentally and physically for 2 years.
  28. 1 point
    Natasha1

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    @JustAnotherSufferer As long as i can remember. It was noted on a grade 1 report card. Side effect so to speak of borderline personality disorder really. Makes sense based on my upbringing.
  29. 1 point
    That song is also very fun. I hope it helps!!
  30. 1 point
    Natasha1

    For the Right Reason

    When i was working with a Tony Robbins cd set many years ago, the first daily assignment was to write down two things id been putting off and take i think it was one small action towards those two things. You could always make it one thing and one action. Baby steps. Just a little bit and keep doing that little bit daily. Eventually increase the actions you take or the time you spend on it. Try it and see how it goes.
  31. 1 point
    ladysmurf

    How Do You Feel Right Now? #7

    i didn't sleep well, so i feel very tired.
  32. 1 point
    I feel like trash! These past 2 weeks have been some of the absolute worst days in my life. Lots of depressive episodes, anxiety and I may be having Insomnia again.
  33. 1 point
    Floor2017

    HI and Intro

    Yes, I so strongly agree and I pray that Wellbutrin be the right one for you for a very long time. I took Wellbutrin for about a year and I enjoyed it until I begin to develop a very dry cough that caused me to have to change back to Celexa.
  34. 1 point
    TopekaK

    How Do You Feel Right Now #6

    I know what you mean. It's like a new ache every day.
  35. 1 point
    Thank you all so much for your input. It is greatly appreciated and I will talk with my friend about what you have all shared with me.
  36. 1 point
    sober4life

    How Do You Feel Right Now #6

    My real life is like I'm the momma bird and everyone I know are baby birds constantly begging for something. This isn't what I meant when I said I wanted a family but it seems like it's this where everyone drains me or I go hide in the woods.
  37. 1 point
    idk that I have much to add to the two most salient points made. From what I remember as a teen in the same position is that pushing only made me withdraw further. In fact, it was worse, the accusatory-sounding quote I remember being, "What's WRONG with you?" It was a question I couldn't answer no matter how incessantly they asked/badgered. Secondly, DF would be a good forum for him and immediate help. Shifting focus, you mentioned Mom is separated and doesn't have emotional support. Perhaps floundering is too strong a word, but if she's having difficulties, an immediate, productive, positive action might be for her to seek professional help for herself, too. The right professional can give her tools to cope, some professional insight on her son's problems, and perhaps even recommend a more suitable therapist for her son.
  38. 1 point
    Floor2017

    Son's friend isolating himself

    Your friend son needs to be able to talk to people, who might be able to understand what he is going through, it is an excellent ideal for him to join a forum like this one so that he can see that it is alright to be able to talk about his depression and the frustrations it is causing him on a daily bases. Be patient with him and continue to try to find the right medication and therapist for him because he is so young and he should not have to live the rest of his life like this if there is help available.
  39. 1 point
    jsop4

    Son's friend isolating himself

    You can't force him into feeling better. Friends and family just have to let him know they are concerned about him and there for him when he needs them. friends should keep inviting him out and not take it personal if he doesn't come out or return a text ( I lost some friends who wouldn't forgive me for this). The right therapist and meds are key. Don't let your friend give up on that front until they find the right ones. Anyway you are a good friend for posting on here. I hope things improve for the young man. Encourage your friend to encourage her son to come on here and vent anonymously to people who probably have experienced many of the things he is going through.
  40. 1 point
    sabiflitch

    Son's friend isolating himself

    I can relate to your friend's son. I'm 24 now, but when I was 17 I admitted myself to a "hospital" because I had been cutting myself. Mind you, my mother was/is a prescription drug addict during entire growing up, and my dad is an emotionless man, so my depression/anxiety had been festering since I was about 7 years old. Anyways, when I was released from the hospital after 8 days, the doctors talked to my parents (who split up months before I came to the hospital) and they expressed how they needed to refrain from arguing in front of me, blaming me, or blaming each other, to just be mature and calm, etc... So next thing that happened on the way home, my parents of course (mainly dad) began to argue and I started crying in the back seat. Make sure his parents, your friend, aren't/isn't pestering him too much. Sometimes parents make jokes out of depression, even if they get a therapist for their kid. My dad always excused it "That's life. You have no reason to be sad, you're so lucky". It's a sensitive topic for me I guess, so I'm sorry if I sound rude at all. Sometimes therapists suck because they truly DO NOT listen. He clearly feels unable to talk to anyone about how he feels, and being a male, he feels even less able to express his emotions, and being a teenager and in your 20's is a nightmare. If he can get what he needs soon, he will be able to cope with whats to come. Everyone wants to know "Why are you depressed" or "Whats wrong?" But if they can't tell you, it's either because they feel like you won't take them seriously, make fun of them, or it's something to do with you/whoever they can't speak to.
  41. 1 point
    bellerose

    How Do You Feel Right Now #6

    I struggle so much in the morning when I need to travel across the city. Motivation is 0. Taking a car to the office instead of the bus again bc I can’t seem to get myself going no matter how much time I give myself in the morning. I’m at a volunteer position, so I need to stop spending so much money on this. It’s important I’m there for getting stuff on my application to grad school, but the cost of getting there is creeping up as my motivation goes down.
  42. 1 point
    velvetpuddles

    What Are You Eating? #2

    Tonight I cooked for the first time in a long time. I made (and am enjoying very much) fried zucchini planks from a zucchini my mom gave me from her garden, marinara for dipping, and garlic bread. Nothing fancy, but I'm happy since I haven't had it in me to cook anything for a while!
  43. 1 point
    JD4010

    Good Days

    Hahaha. I should start posting pix of 5th & 6th season Ruby. I have a huge crush on her, a lot like your fascination with Castiel I suppose. I find her to be extra, extra gorgeous.
  44. 1 point
    My handyman/hauler was available early and just got the delivery done. (He really earned his 60 bucks...and a brewski). Landlord/neighbor/owner's done for the day, too. And So Am I. Between that sh#t and the clueless therapist interview - still po'd about that - one of the most stressful days I've had recently. Likely I'll just f*****g hide for the weekend. (On a happier note, Spot saw me collapse on the bed and immediately jumped on me to give me kitty CPR for five minutes)
  45. 1 point
    KCDPN

    Alone for life

    I'm going to a movie event with my cousin later in July and I forced myself to make a Facebook again. I don't have anything in common with people my age but I'm still trying to talk to people. The issue is that my parents don't really let me do stuff or go out unless it's somewhere with THEM. (They think stuff like hanging out with friends are "white" things and since they weren't raised on it, they see no reason to let me do it)
  46. 1 point
    lonelyforeigner

    Alone for life

    What have you tried? Being on the introverted and nerdy side doesn't automatically doom you, you just need to find someone with similar interests. The issue being that many nerdy women are like nerdy guys, they're often passive and they'll sit at home and play video games instead of going out and meeting people.
  47. 1 point
    Hi again~ I am happy to report that I experienced significant improvement in the month of July and started feeling back to my old self again. I now consider myself to be 100% recovered from my SEVERE adverse reaction to Prozac. I'm happy, healthy, and drug free to boot! As I've stated before..........statistically speaking I am an extreme case of this drug gone horribly wrong, however, I've learned that statistics don't mean a damm thing to the people who are on the wrong side of them. So, if you suspect that you might be suffering from a severe adverse reaction to or withdrawal from an SSRI please feel free to PM me if you have any questions (I don't visit this often anymore). Healing thoughts to all! lov
  48. 0 points
    sober4life

    How Do You Feel Right Now #6

    It's one of those days where I'm completely brain dead but I have to be out all day anyway. Wouldn't it be nice to be able to say I need a break from everything and then just be able to do it. The stressful days never end. It's one right after the other until I break over and over again.
  49. 0 points
    JD4010

    How Do You Feel Right Now #6

    I'm getting grief from my boss (AGAIN) about not having an item on a meeting agenda...it's just an "FYI" item, nothing for action. But he's on a rampage now because I didn't include it. It's going to be one of those days.
  50. 0 points
    duck

    What's On Your Mind Right Now? (2)

    I am having a rough week since Monday. My mind is not settled. I tried listening to music etc. Finally, I gave in and took Clonazepam/Rivotril.
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