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Working On It

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i still have not filled in this form. but. i have almost finished writing a short chronological about what happened oct and nov. it is so difficult for me to remember everything at once. i do have memory problems, especially in the sense that there seems to be only one event at the time to fit in my brain to think about. (eek this sounds too strange.) so i have to do it bit by bit. i can remember, but only piece by piece, not all at the same time. and working hard to figure out what has happened on which day. some days were just too full of things happening, seems like a whole week.

i need this 'review' of what happened when, as in the form they ask about 'the accident on date xyz' while the accident was another day but i had to go to hospital on the later date again, but it was not a new accident.

and i'm still trying to figure out what exactly they want to know with this form. if it really is what they ask, the answer doesn't fit into that one line. maybe i just have to use an extra sheet of paper. oh lord have mercy why am i so scared to fill in a form and maybe not fill it correctly.

i'm also working on telling myself that it is GOOD that i'm working on this form, on remembering and thinking through what-has-happened (and it is painful); and trying to avoid thoughts of berating myself for not having this finished yet.

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